Miscellaneous: Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched...

By Gale - 13/01/2009 15:01 - United States

Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched it come back down and hit me in the face. Gravity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 873

You deserved it 52 955

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Same thing different taste

By untitledentity - 24/05/2009 16:03 - United States

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 688

You deserved it 19 934

By Anonymous - 17/02/2014 02:29 - United States - Hedgesville

Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 531

You deserved it 62 955

By ouchmyeye - 10/06/2011 04:59 - United States

Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I walked on my balcony only to find my boyfriend throwing rocks trying to wake me. He didn't see me and threw a rock right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 702

You deserved it 5 124

By Anonymous - 04/02/2014 18:00 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, as I came home from school, I saw a little rock in the road. I kicked it, intending to send it sailing into the bushes in front of my house. It went wide and sailed straight into a window instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 492

You deserved it 16 790

By jadakorn - 11/07/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 176

You deserved it 29 387

What goes up…

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 11:10 - United States - Grand Junction

Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 773

You deserved it 10 799

By hopeless - 27/06/2011 14:09 - Canada

Today, I was playing tetherball with my younger brother. I get really competitive, so I threw it as hard as I could. It came around and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 771

You deserved it 54 156

By BOOMerang - 24/09/2009 21:39 - United States

Today, I played with a boomerang my first time. I didn't believe that when you threw it, it comes right back to you. It flew back all right. And broke my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 431

You deserved it 45 452

By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 16:57 - United States

Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 570

You deserved it 13 143

By swirkishly - 24/11/2011 16:06 - United States

Today, I was walking through my house when I noticed bits of plaster falling from the ceiling. Against all logic, I looked up, receiving a fragment directly in the eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 993

You deserved it 10 014

Timmytwofinger 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 3:06

if it's any consolation i think i just pissed myself.

sai_fml 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 8:42

Wow you have an impressive arm...very very difficult to throw a rock straight up and down... You should put some of that training diligence into the "dodging" component of the excercise

Comments

michelleissexy 0

Wednesday 11 May 2011 13:03

Next time try a can of paint or a brick. You'll remember to move then...

sarahboo88 0

Saturday 14 May 2011 2:27

dumb ass

majorbob10 0

Monday 27 June 2011 16:06

I nominate you for a Darwin Award!

majorbob10 0

Monday 27 June 2011 16:09

I don't believe any of you realize the GRAVITY of OP's situation...

Bridget615 0

Friday 22 July 2011 4:17

Didnt it occur to u tht wen a rock is hurling towards ur face very quickly tht its a sign to move out of its way...duh?

Bridget615 0

Friday 22 July 2011 4:20

Didnt it occur to u tht wen a rock is hurling towards ur face very quickly tht its a sign to move out of its way...duh?

domking1315 20

Saturday 23 July 2011 20:06

Today, I decided to punch my twin that lives in the mirror. Stupidity.

BloodyMary666 24

Thursday 1 September 2011 18:58

I´m speechless right now. What the f*ck?! This is without a doubt the best FML I´ve ever read.

BloodyMary666 24

Thursday 1 September 2011 19:03

Argh, I meant "dumbest".

Renae123 0

Monday 5 September 2011 23:15

What made you think it wouldn't come Back?

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The Top

Today, after the seventh morning in a row where my son threw a fit because he wanted to wear summer clothes, I put him in shorts and a tank top and put him outside. He got the message and changed into long sleeves and pants. Ten minutes later, cops pull up. My nosy neighbor called CPS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 84

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 373

You deserved it 6 871

The Top

Today, while alone in the childcare centre I work at, one of the children farted bad enough to trigger my morning sickness. Because I was alone, I couldn't leave the room, which resulted in me throwing up into a 2-year-old-sized toilet, while 12 toddlers either watched or ran wild. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 954

You deserved it 1 873

Today, I was feeling depressed, so I decided to go snowboarding with friends to cheer myself up. I fell on the first trail and broke my dominant wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 853

You deserved it 581

Today, my dad decided to clean my 20 gallon fish tank. I had 6 fish. One of them was called a transparent fish, clear with a bright orange tail, which was my favorite. My dad didn't see it, and dumped the water out along with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 914

You deserved it 3 923

Today, I can't sit down for a book or some TV without my wife coming up and moaning at me to "get a hobby, get out of the house once in a while, you never do anything anymore." I have a healthy, balanced social life, but maybe I want to relax in my own house for once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 77

Today, I was babysitting a little boy. I opened up a new bottle of bubbles and it was all goopy and gross so I said, "Eww!" The boy then asked, "What's "ew" mean?" I replied, "Something gross and yucky." Then he pointed at my face and say "Ew! Ew! Ewwww!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 617

You deserved it 8 908

Today, I had to deal with both ants and aunts. It was my great aunt's burial, and so I had to deal with my OTHER great aunt, who is a judgmental Karen. Later on, I tried to get a snack from the pantry. There were ants crawling everywhere, which I didn't realize until I almost ate an ant-infested pop tart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 176

Same thing different taste

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