Miscellaneous: Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML - FML

By Anonymous - 02/06/2011 04:17

Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 616

You deserved it 18 376

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Fake news!

By Anon - 28/11/2023 14:00 - Canada

Today, after I tried to plan a surprise party for my friend, and a series of miscommunications and accidental reveals, it turned it into a surprise party for myself. I walked into a room filled with people shouting, "Surprise!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 194

The hair of the dog

By Anonymous - 20/06/2024 16:00 - Australia

Today, my friends threw me a surprise birthday party. I was genuinely surprised—and also genuinely hungover from celebrating my birthday alone the night before because they'd all told me they were busy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 122

By TanjinaRubbaiyat - 15/01/2010 08:49 - Bangladesh

Today, I was dumped at the surprise party I threw for my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 081

You deserved it 3 014

By Killme - 13/07/2016 02:10

Today, as a birthday present, my friends threw a surprise party for me. I was so surprised, I pissed myself in front of everyone, including my crush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 142

You deserved it 2 122

By nofriends - 09/02/2016 05:17 - United States - Boise

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he wanted to throw me a surprise birthday party. The only issue was the fact I didn't have any friends to make it happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 089

You deserved it 1 963

Perfect

By Anonymous - 17/11/2009 02:40 - United States

Today, I had a surprise birthday party thrown in my honor. All of my friends and family had been invited, and all of the details were perfect. Who threw the party for me? My ex-girlfriend who I dumped last week for "not being thoughtful enough." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 055

You deserved it 58 111

It's the thought that counts

By Blade83 - 09/08/2024 12:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, my friends threw me a surprise birthday party. The problem? My birthday is tomorrow. I spent the entire evening pretending I was surprised and happy, all while knowing they got the date wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 159

You deserved it 575

Hush, Mother

By Anonymous - 06/07/2024 22:00 - United States - Reno

Today, I went to a surprise birthday party for a friend. Everyone was hiding and waiting to yell "Surprise!" when I got a call from my mom. I was loudly discussing family gossip and trying to get my mom to hang up when the door opened. Everyone yelled "Surprise!" and then turned to stare at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 1 064

By Anonymous - 26/01/2010 18:55 - Canada

Today, my family threw me a surprise party for my 29th Birthday. My brother-in-law sent me a text telling me they were all waiting for me to arrive. Thinking it was at my sister's home, I drove two hours there. It was actually at my parents' house. I missed my party and they ate my cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 363

You deserved it 8 722

I hate surprises

By Anonymous - 29/09/2024 20:00 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, my friends threw me a surprise birthday party. They shouted "Surprise!" as I walked into the room. In pure shock, I dropped the groceries I was holding, including a bottle of wine, which shattered. I spent the first 10 or so minutes of my party cleaning red wine and glass off the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 96

Next

Top comments

RecklessJellyBea 7

Thursday 2 June 2011 12:24

I'm surprised you were even invited.

redbluegreen 40

Thursday 2 June 2011 12:11

And you're genuinely surprised it's come to this?

Comments

ydnar 5

Thursday 2 June 2011 15:19

I like to tell people i'm planning a surprise birthday party for myself never really followed though on it or posted on the internet to let everybody know. Just wondering were you so surprised that you punched yourself in the face? That would be a good FML.

Leigh_Badd 1

Thursday 2 June 2011 15:22

Surprise...??

SteelCladAngel 0

Thursday 2 June 2011 15:25

maybe op has multiple personality disorder and one personality threw the surprise party for ops other personality/personalities

rhpsfan9 10

Thursday 2 June 2011 15:50

did u buy yourself presents and a cake? least you'll have first dibs on it!

TKrisha_fml 5

Thursday 2 June 2011 15:53

I bet nobody came to the party but your mum

whyXD 13

Thursday 2 June 2011 15:55

I love surprise party's!!!!!!

jj05 0

Thursday 2 June 2011 16:17

sorry man. that sucks.

Pinkanani 12

Thursday 2 June 2011 16:45

The real FML would be if no one showed...

Capt_Oblivious 10

Thursday 2 June 2011 17:15

Were you surprised to see yourself there, or were you more like 'why were THEY invited?'

ivan_m25 0

Thursday 2 June 2011 17:53

what's the word I'm looking for here? umm... LAME!!!!!!

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 3 960

Today, my wife upset herself by ringing my best friend to see if he would lie about where I was, and he did. Now my wife thinks I get my friends to lie for me to cover up my cheating. I’ve never once cheated. This feels like the next level up from cheating on her in her dreams, because she's crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 131

The Top

Today, my colleague introduced herself and said, "I know how nerve-racking first days are!" Which is nice of her, except I've been at this company longer than she has. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 147

You deserved it 324

Today, I had to deal with a snobby rich woman who asked me to cure her daughter's "unhealthy obsession" with playing outside instead of watching TV with the rest of the family. She called me a liar when I said playing outside is a normal thing for a 6 year-old child to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 139

You deserved it 938

Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 665

You deserved it 3 299

Today, the lady whose son I babysit sent me a text, saying she left a gift for me for all the hard work I've done. I found a beautifully-wrapped box where she said the gift was. It turned out my actual gift was cookies sitting right next to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 749

You deserved it 3 805

Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 578

You deserved it 6 006

Today, as I was driving to work, I got a flat tire. While attempting to replace said tire, I got mugged. The guy took all my money, my iPod, cellphone, and CDs. When I finally called my boss to explain my situation, he fired me. Why? Because I was late and had an "overactive imagination." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 039

You deserved it 2 512