thankyou, finally someone with some common sense and decency.

Your parent is not your friend, they are your parent. Playing the friend just ends up with bratty children. A child isn't in need of a friend, they have plenty of those on the playgrounds. They are in need of a parent, an ADULT, a SUPERIOR to look up to. As a friend, sure, you get respect to a degree, but no where near what you need. Your father never gave you ANY responsibility, never really punished you? Hate to break it to you, but you ARE spoiled, and I'm willing to bet you're pretty bratty. A couple parents around here try your "friend" method. One mother refused to tell her children "no" because she "doesn't want to hurt their feelings" and "doesn't want them to know what it's like to be without." Now we have a little whiny bitch of a daughter who demanded her independence, and her mother let her live in a trailer on their property, and a little psycho of a son who frequently spurs phonecalls from teachers who demand the woman to control her child, but she refuses. Another mother also let her daughters have whatever they wanted. Recently, the eldest (the one my age) helped her father oust her from her own home. Friends are chosen people. Friendship is made and broken easily, especially with minors. You can not IMPOSE friendship. As a friend, your child is not OBLIGATED to listen to you; they can just stop being your friend. That is one of the basics of such a relationship. Meanwhile, as a PARENT, as an AUTHORITY, you can impose your will and your child is obligated to obey, because they are the child, and you are the parent. Granted there are some pretty psychotic ***** out there doing some awful shit to their children, I won't deny that. I'm speaking of parents who act like parents and do not actually enslave or abuse their children. My parents often beat my ass, grounded me, sent me to my room, took my things.... I had to pay for what I did. I am by no means traumatized or sooo hurt or any of that stupid shit. I do what I'm told, when I'm told, and as I'm told. Not just by them, but by other superiors in my life (teachers, club leaders, etc). There's no coddling in parenthood. No "Well, if that is how you really feel, I can't BLAHBLAH" Did they beat me black and blue? Did they completely strip me of my individuality? Did they horribly mutilate my developing mind? No! And, certainly there were times that called for talks rather than actions. Do I feel subject to their every beck and whim? Of course not! In fact, they quite encouraged me to speak my mind, but taught me a little thing called "tact." Without tact, there are dire consequences (such as an ass whipping lol). Respect and subtlety are key. And "beating the shit out" is obviously exaggerated. We all really mean just spank her. I must ask, though, how the HELL is extra chores and a scolding too harsh!? She did WRONG, she must learn what happens when you do WRONG. The REAL world will not be as forgiving if she pulls that kind of shit. Boy who cried wolf...

Your method will evidentally trigger a chain reaction that will result in the child gaining a plastic form of respect for you out of fear of being oppressed. The only way you will be able to gain any TRUE form of respect would be to gain the child's trust so that they have an understanding of your life as much as you have an understanding of theirs'. In this manner you will also be able to avoid circumstances where the child would be unable to talk to you about certain issues due to a fear that has arisen from your so called "desired" respect. Although, I agree that we should not spoil children. I believe we should educate them on how important certain things may be in life. As opposed to simply punishing them and leaving them in the dark for them to figure out what is right and wrong. This will result in them coming up with their own form of redemption or justice, which in many cases may be catastrophic. I believe that a parent should be friends with their children because this results in a genuine form of mutual respect for one another. As opposed to the fake form of respect that you wish to receive from the child, when excommunicating with them in the manner that you have stated and seem to support. I consider my father and mother to be my friends and would like to consider myself to not be spoilt. I help them when they ask me to and we have a mutual understanding for one another's feelings and personal space.

You completely missed the majority of my post, specifically my examples of parents who try your little "friend" stunt, and what happens when a child has a friend instead of a parent. Again, you can drop a friend. You can't drop a parent. You don't get respect when you **** up. This is how the world works, pansyboy. Or do you think your boss is going to sit down and have a calm talk with you instead of firing your ass when you screw up? You really think it's impossible to trust/respect parents who choose to act like parents and not like best buddies forevers? Hm! You have enlightened me! I was totally just lying to myself when I said I respected my parents because obviously I was just oppressing how abusive and hateful my childhood was because I got my hand slapped and told "No" on occasion.

Pansyboy? In all honest your mentality is not mature enough to even attempt arguing. So you may read this quote instead "The simplest way to stop a flamewar is to breathe deeply, swallow your bile and just LET an idiot have the last word." farewell Idiot.

The comments u write r so long

You just dropped to their level by calling them an idiot. That means you have the same mentality. Actually being called a pansy is probably a lot less immature rather than calling someone an idiot after being called out as being a pansy

i think that's illegal