Money: Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so...

By fmlguy - 10/12/2010 03:19

Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 259

You deserved it 86 250

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Her revenge

By Anonymous - 25/02/2020 22:00

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 710

You deserved it 771

By John - 19/11/2011 17:50 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 488

You deserved it 5 110

By manhood fading away - 25/12/2016 20:24 - United Kingdom - Heckmondwike

Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 190

You deserved it 772

By holla1787 - 04/12/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 545

You deserved it 2 820

Christmas Watts

By Conflicted as hell - 23/12/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I’m trying to figure out how to spend Christmas with my wife and kids… and my girlfriend. I’m planning to divorce my wife in January, because doing it on Christmas would hurt them all, but I don’t want my girlfriend to know I’m married or else she’ll leave me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 2 440

Sweet relief

By Anonymous - 17/06/2016 03:00

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 625

You deserved it 1 566

Run away, now

By Anonymous - 15/12/2016 04:50

Today, my girlfriend gave me a choice of having a circumcision or breaking up with her. Either way I'm going to lose something I hold dear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 428

You deserved it 1 081

By Anonymous - 24/09/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 800

You deserved it 13 648

By R281780 - 14/02/2016 15:53 - United States - San Jose

Today, my girlfriend is locked in the bathroom crying because I didn't buy her anything for Valentine's Day, even though Friday, at her suggestion, we agreed not to exchange gifts because both of our birthdays are a week away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 416

You deserved it 4 169

Instagone

By Anonymous - 02/01/2018 22:00 - United States - Lyons

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of almost four years was breaking up with me when she captioned an Instagram post saying, "Who else besides me is going into 2018 single?" I had already bought an engagement ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 317

You deserved it 346

GoingLesbian 0

Friday 10 December 2010 9:05

Does she have expensive tastes? Or are you seriously that indecent?

thatgirl503 0

Friday 10 December 2010 9:04

wth?

Comments

poelovesyourmom 0

Saturday 11 December 2010 17:06

you're an asshole

poobare2015 0

Saturday 11 December 2010 17:09

loser!!!!!!!!

Brooke4494 0

Saturday 11 December 2010 18:16

my boyfriend did that we never got back together...

zepirothica 0

Sunday 12 December 2010 1:17

I hope she kicks you in the balls and steals your car.

meli13zech33 0

Sunday 12 December 2010 3:25

your an asshole. if i were ur girlfriend (thank god im not) i would slap u so hard u wouldn't be able to feel ur face for a week.

nicole317 0

Sunday 12 December 2010 6:24

wow. that's ridiculous. seems like ur an a$$. u should break up with her. she deserves better.

MDNL 0

Sunday 12 December 2010 6:48

someones a shallow peace of shit. :p

KamilleBlack 3

Sunday 12 December 2010 7:32

U should break up with her anyways cuz ur wasting her time by making her think she's not dating a selfish douchebag. Ur an ass. --'

ameliabeth09 0

Sunday 12 December 2010 7:49

Douche bag

basketball03 0

Sunday 12 December 2010 7:52

ur prob a greasy bastard anyways

Keywords

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The Top

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 362

You deserved it 5 630

Today, I came home early from business trip to Paris, where I bought an engagement ring. I was going to take my girlfriend of two years out and propose to her. I sneaked into our house as a surprise and… she was having sex with another man. Now I have a ring that I can only return in France. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 492

You deserved it 4 181

The Top

Today, a man came up to me asking for my name. Thinking he was trying to hit on me, I rudely gave him a fake name. He thanked me and walked away. I continued to watch him leaving until I saw him ask another woman for her name and took out a wallet and showed it to her. It was my lost wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 845

You deserved it 64 710

Today, my wife filed for divorce. Last month, she was diagnosed with stage 4, terminal, inoperable cancer. We got a second (confirmed) opinion. She has maybe six months left. She told me she doesn't want to spend her last remaining days on this earth with me. Our 33rd anniversary was in May. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 808

You deserved it 218

Today, I went to the mall and saw a really cute guy. I acted all cool and started doing a sexy hair flip. On the way back up from my hair flip I hit my head on a cellphone stand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 065

You deserved it 58 915

Today, at work, I was called into the office by my supervisor, on whom I have a massive crush. He called me in to get my password to make some adjustments on my work account and asked me what my password was. I had to hold eye contact with him and tell him my password is his full name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 650

You deserved it 46 191

Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "That's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "Push a little harder" while dissecting a frog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 694

You deserved it 28 270

Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think they were more surprised by the box of naughty toys under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 052

You deserved it 11 497