Love: Today, I wanted to impress my girlfriend with a cool fire breathing... - FML

By Anonymous - 09/06/2010 04:41 - United States

Today, I wanted to impress my girlfriend with a cool fire breathing trick I learned online, and ended up burning half her room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 169

You deserved it 64 348

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Same thing different taste

By 117halo12345 - 17/12/2015 21:37 - United States - Sedgewickville

Today, I was showing my 4 year old some of my fire magic tricks. I ended up getting 2nd degree burns on my left hand and burnt off half of her hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 282

You deserved it 21 736

By blck - 01/01/2009 02:53 - United States

Today, my girlfriend tried to clean out the fireplace with a vacuum cleaner, she sucked up a bunch of embers which set the vacuum on fire. After a crying for a bit, she went back to finish cleaning up only to find that some embers she dumped in a bucket melted through and set part of the carpet on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 680

You deserved it 3 929

By failure as a parent - 11/05/2013 21:19 - United States - Bound Brook

Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 426

You deserved it 6 290

By CandlesSuck - 02/11/2009 03:44 - Canada

Today, I invited my girlfriend to come over, telling her I had a surprise. I filled the bathtub and lit a lot of candles to be romantic. She gets here, and we start doing our thing. Until we smell something burning. It was my hair. I now have a bald spot on the back of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 820

You deserved it 29 366

By Anonymous - 04/08/2019 22:00

Today, my girlfriend threw boiling water at me to get me off my phone. It worked, but now I'm burned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 974

You deserved it 288

Cook out

By Anonymous - 28/01/2023 12:30

Today, to impress my date with dinner, I spent hours prepping and cooking. Just as I was about to serve her, I realized I'd left the stove on and my kitchen was on fire. As the fire trucks arrived and my date looked on in horror, I couldn't help but think, "My cooking is so hot it literally set the house on fire." FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 462

Technically…

By I followed her orders! - 04/12/2023 07:00 - United States

Today, my boss told me to not burn the place down while she was outside. When she came back inside, I accidentally started a fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 477

By Anonymous - 30/11/2011 03:13 - United States

Today, I decided to light a candle in my room. Since fire intrigues me, I put an old brochure into it. Paper burns fast, and now my carpet has a big, black burn mark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 288

You deserved it 72 534

By fireman - 06/10/2010 09:31 - United States

Today, I went over to this girl's house that I really like. I was planning on cooking her dinner. In the process, the grease in the pan got too hot and caught fire. We ended up having to call the fire department. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 198

You deserved it 8 411

By Anonymous - 01/08/2011 04:28 - United States

Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 159

You deserved it 5 786

Next

Top comments

pianoman05st 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:00

you don't do a trick like this inside a house glad she's pressing charges

menother 2

Wednesday 9 June 2010 11:58

This is why you don't learn FIRE tricks from videos online that could easily be doctored. Although you probably need one now. Doesn't it take YEARS of practice for someone to learn this kind of trick in the real world?

Comments

Lisa89 3

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:16

YDI... for playing with fire, INSIDE her bedroom

lettertjes 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:16

Well that's dumb.

LOL_Noobs 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:20

never play with fire?

brainonska08 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:23

they say "don't try this at home" for a reason!

hhknighter 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:39

better get back online and learn how to find a lawyer

Rik_fml 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:40

Doing a fire breathing trick you got from the Internet is stupid enough,but doing it indoors just goes to show how much of a retard you really are.YDI

Jenmaree 9

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:44

Indoors? YDI idiot!

wolfman860 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:44

are you retarted? your supposed to do it outside

Mirorbo 26

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:51

Darling, you KNOW it's a bad idea when "fire breathing trick" and "online" are in the same sentence.

texassmile05 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 12:51

YDI... Ya moron.

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The Top

Today, I got home from visiting my long-distance girlfriend. I spent $366 to get a plane ticket to visit her for the week. The day after I arrived there, she broke up with me and I had to buy a ticket for an earlier flight home. With fees and penalties, I paid around $550 to be broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 712

You deserved it 5 223

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him "Meow" over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin, and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 634

You deserved it 68 713

The Top

Today, my baby threw up all over my homework, which I worked really hard on and is due tomorrow. Moral of the story is don’t have a kid when you're in high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 1 186

Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 616

You deserved it 35 196

Today, I broke my arm, and posted a picture of my X-ray on Facebook to show everyone how bad the break is. Nobody even asked me if I was OK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 867

You deserved it 39 496

Today, I came home from a business trip and was greeted by a foul smell. I soon found out my husband accidentally let the milk go bad by leaving it out all day, then tried to solve the problem by "balancing the temperatures" by putting it in the freezer. Oh honey, no. Just no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 711

You deserved it 1 955

Today, while driving to my girlfriend's house, I passed up a stop sign without stopping. A car passing by honked. I honked back several times and flipped them the finger. Turns out it was my girlfriend's dad trying to say hi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 212

You deserved it 65 151

Today, my boyfriend's brother and his fiancée decided to preach to me about how I need to read the Bible because I'm agnostic. I'd be fine, if it wasn't coming from two 19-year-olds who dated for 5 months, got pregnant, got engaged, lost the baby, and still wanna get married, "so they don't look bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 873

You deserved it 2 426