Work: Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school...

By anonymous - 31/10/2014 23:28 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 854

You deserved it 2 711

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 01:31 - United States

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 876

You deserved it 7 649

By whotouchedyou1 - 26/08/2014 02:37 - United States - Cypress

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 197

You deserved it 11 769

By Acu7519 - 16/04/2018 15:00

Today, at my job as a 2nd grade teacher, I was explaining to my students how I'm pregnant and will have to take a break from teaching after I have my baby. One of my students replied with "Ooooooooohhh Ms. Johnson had sex!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 200

You deserved it 851

By pencilskirt - 22/03/2019 00:00

Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 302

By Anonymous - 03/08/2016 18:50 - Canada - London

Today, even though I'm overweight, I was feeling alright about the way I looked in the historical costume I'm required to wear by my job. A little kid came in and asked me if I was having a baby. Guess I don't look as good as I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 709

You deserved it 1 419

By actually just constipated.. and stupid - 04/03/2015 15:03 - Tunisia

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 367

You deserved it 37 991

By Anonymous - 04/05/2014 23:28 - United States - Madison

Today, I was at the bar. A man started to hit on me. He claims to have a fetish for pregnant women. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 774

You deserved it 6 017

By Fangirl#1 - 29/10/2018 22:10

Today, students were permitted to wear costumes at my school, but only about half of us did. In 4th period a guy asked me, "What are you supposed to be?" I wasn’t wearing a costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 520

You deserved it 326

By embarassed - 20/03/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, I dragged my son along with me to a work party because I didn't want him home by himself. Halfway through, he stood up and made an announcement about my pregnancy. I had to explain to all my coworkers and my boss that I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 041

You deserved it 10 510

By Not-pregnant - 20/04/2014 17:21 - United States - Melbourne

Today, my dad made me stick my gut out and walk around awkwardly, just so I'd look pregnant and let him get away with parking in an "expectant mothers" parking spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 619

You deserved it 4 888

devildog562 33

Saturday 1 November 2014 6:15

The principal was just jealous you didn't have his baby. Or he's mad that the teacher is having his. Take your pick.

PossiblyInDanger 24

Saturday 1 November 2014 6:15

It's okay. I was almost kicked out of school for a few stitches drawn on my face.

Comments

cellycrunk 16

Saturday 1 November 2014 14:04

Maybe the teacher took the selfie with you to show the principle and complain.

demonfacee 14

Saturday 1 November 2014 14:18

Principals are stupid sometimes, how should that make anyone uncomfortable? I brought a fake cigarette to school on accident and I surprisingly didn't get in trouble.

ImTheAlpha 30

Saturday 1 November 2014 17:23

This one guy at my school dressed up as a security guard. it was also a fat suit with a fake plumber butt. The actual security guard found it absolutely hilarious. your principal must be oversensitive, or hate you.

ThunderTheRad 14

Saturday 1 November 2014 21:33

What kind of school does OP go to? They don't let you wear costumes in schools past elementary.

ImTheAlpha 30

Sunday 2 November 2014 1:22

My school does as long as it's not too overly sexual or inappropriate, and you're not wearing a mask. High schoolers oddly enough dress up in costumes and go to school in them more than middle school kids. hmm.