Miscellaneous: Today, I was at the pool, casually flirting with one of the lifeguards....

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By Anonymous - 11/08/2009 08:58 - United States

Today, I was at the pool, casually flirting with one of the lifeguards. He said that he would gladly give me CPR, in the event that I needed it. I laughed and thanked him, stating that it was a sweet idea, even though I wouldn't be needing assistance. I then choked on my bottled water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 939

You deserved it 44 873

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Baywatch

By Anonymous - 02/10/2017 19:30 - United States - Stony Brook

Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 354

You deserved it 517

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 00:14 - United States

Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 449

You deserved it 7 723

By Anonymous - 04/07/2014 19:04 - Netherlands

Today, on my first day as a lifeguard, a man had a heart attack in the pool. I jumped in, pulled him out, and even went to the hospital with him. He seemed genuinely offended, saying "You should've let me die." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 968

You deserved it 3 438

Surprise

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 19:14 - United States

Today, I was drinking a bottle of water. My friend came up from behind and scared me, causing me to inhale and choke on the water. Lacking air, I passed out. I awoke to him on the ground laughing his ass off. I almost drowned drinking a bottle of water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 343

You deserved it 4 365

By mathii - 23/07/2011 23:52 - France

Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 779

You deserved it 6 173

Sick moves, bro

By Fish - 19/03/2009 15:47 - United Arab Emirates

Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 302

You deserved it 55 381

By megan - 01/04/2015 17:56 - United States - Lutz

Today, it's April Fool's day. I had to take a CPR class, and everything was going well. We took a break and I went to get a drink of water and started choking. They thought I was making fun of the class, and made me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 216

You deserved it 2 477

By anonymous - 10/06/2009 22:50 - United States

Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 740

You deserved it 4 678

By Higgs - 02/06/2009 19:10 - United States

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 159

You deserved it 6 242

By t - 17/05/2011 03:26

Today, I got a really bad cramp while I was swimming in my neighborhood pool. I started to go under until the lifeguard jumped in and saved me. I guess it would have been great, if I wasn't a fellow lifeguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 773

You deserved it 6 161

Heartless234 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 16:18

Aw that's embarrassing. Hey sometimes I choke on my saliva :D.

mannix_fml 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 16:12

It was mean't to be, dum dum!

Comments

kati3baby 0

Sunday 11 April 2010 7:52

haha #19, you are a bad flirt and how embarrassing LOL much

hassenpfeffermmm 0

Thursday 22 April 2010 21:11

I smell desperation.

jayjay88 2

Tuesday 12 October 2010 15:13

This is weird, you don't give someone CPR if they are choking anyway. Therefore this isn't an FML. :)

personguydude17 0

Monday 27 June 2011 23:47

what did you do eat the bottle

PrimeStarscream 30

Thursday 28 July 2011 1:51

Haha, karma sucks.

PedoPancakes 7

Friday 20 January 2012 1:31

You know your cool when... ;) At least you could tell him it was just an act... :D

Waspinator1998 21

Friday 13 December 2013 6:26

Looks like you made his day.

KittyChesire 12

Saturday 1 March 2014 19:12

Op should have said 'you leave me breathless'

doglover100 28

Sunday 9 March 2014 15:09

Choking on water sucks, you can't drink water to help.

fleckney26 25

Saturday 21 June 2014 8:15

It could also be a threat, bring that correct CPR breaks your ribs.... Just sayin'

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Same thing different taste

Baywatch

Surprise

Sick moves, bro

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