Sex and Intimacy: Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first...

By illequipt - 16/03/2009 03:20 - Canada

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204 569

You deserved it 32 066

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:56 - United States - Huntington Park

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 466

You deserved it 9 862

By Photagrapher - 18/08/2010 04:09 - France

Today, my girlfriend asked for a picture of my penis, so I sent her one. Then later on, she asked for one when I was hard, the first one I sent I was hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 615

You deserved it 17 783

By arctic1 - 27/05/2009 09:45 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 327

You deserved it 68 710

By Eddie - 07/08/2011 19:43 - Israel

Today, I took my clothes off in front of my girlfriend for the first time. She made a weird face for a moment, then burst into laughter. She couldn't stop laughing, no matter how hard she tried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 906

You deserved it 4 923

By Anonymous - 12/08/2015 02:23 - Israel - Tel Aviv

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, I pushed all the way in. She said, "Stop teasing me, put everything in." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 295

You deserved it 4 522

By fruitoftheloom - 09/03/2015 05:13 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, my girlfriend took off my pants for the first time. She was more impressed by the pattern on my boxers than by my cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 966

You deserved it 7 323

By tigerbyrn - 30/05/2016 15:35 - Canada - Scarborough

Today, as I was about to meet my girlfriend's parents, she thought it would be funny to grab my junk and give me a hard-on right before they walked in. I couldn't hide it quickly enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 068

You deserved it 2 096

Like a virgin

By chchboy - 22/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 154

You deserved it 7 122

Bazinga

By Anonymous - 20/03/2009 15:07 - United States

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we were hugging when she put her feet on my feet. We started walking around like that and I said, "This is hard to maintain." She replied with "So's your erection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 692

You deserved it 17 084

By herve - 22/05/2009 19:50 - Lebanon

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 024

You deserved it 11 617

jackaaa 0

Monday 16 March 2009 12:02

Aww baby penis.

Puolukka 4

Monday 16 March 2009 12:23

Maybe it was the first time for her to fool around with a guy like that period and she just didn't know what it's supposed to feel like/what it feels like when it's not hard?! She obviously has never touched a penis before...because even if it was pretty small you can still tell if the guy is hard or not... o.O

Comments

plethora 3

Monday 16 March 2009 13:32

Haha #10. Puppetry of the penis?

csigabajnok 0

Monday 16 March 2009 13:34

Well, it seems you have a certain ability that allows you to fulfill her wishes even before she utters them. Use it wisely! ;)

Faced159 0

Monday 16 March 2009 13:35

Don't worry about it brother. It's hard to tell that through jeans anyway. And she was probably just saying that to heat up the moment more. She probably wasn't even paying attention to it.

null_fml 11

Monday 16 March 2009 13:46

Yeah, they're... jeans. That's the real problem. Blame the jeans.

daniellap 0

Monday 16 March 2009 14:24

actually it's true that you can barely feel anything through jeans my ex boyfriend definitely wasn't small, and through track pants, dress pants, etc. I can feel him being hard immediately but through jeans? nopes!

dang_fml 0

Monday 16 March 2009 14:33

hahaha omg lmao @ #10

tehhotness 0

Monday 16 March 2009 14:51

Am i supposed to conduct with my penis?

YouCantBreakMe 9

Tuesday 28 September 2010 5:10

Family Guy!!!

Zic_fml 7

Monday 16 March 2009 15:17

Whahah, I don't think the problem is in your willy, I think she wasn't even paying attention to that.

pupeto2005 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 21:51

sara942 0

Monday 16 March 2009 15:29

what kind of underwear were you wearing? at first I didn't realize when my last bf was hard because I was used to guys wearing boxers, and he wore boxer briefs. those definitely mask erections...especially through jeans; it's harder to tell through jeans than any other kind of pants.

vonstrangle 0

Monday 16 March 2009 15:44

maybe you should start wearing tights so your ego isn't hurt for the silliest of things. (jeans are thick and very constricting) also, you're girlfriend sounds like a bit of a bimbo. "get hard for me" baha righhhht