Love: Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me...

By vagina dentata for christmas, pls - 25/01/2013 18:51 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 773

You deserved it 5 049

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To each his own

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Absecon

Today, my boyfriend took me home for the first time. His place was covered in Insane Clown Posse stuff, even the toilet bowl. He's an undercover Juggalo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 416

You deserved it 4 905

By WasZumTeufel? - 01/01/2013 00:55 - Germany - Kabel

Today, my boyfriend took me to his house and introduced me to his parents. He also showed me around his bedroom. I think he forgot to remove the dartboard on his wall, taped to which was a swiss-cheesed printout of one of my Facebook photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 554

You deserved it 3 925

By Anonymous - 01/07/2009 19:18 - United States

Today, I was in my new boyfriend's apartment for the first time. As I was flipping through his photo albums, I came across one full of disturbingly candid pictures of me. I found some as early as my trip to the state fair, three years ago. I met my boyfriend two months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 169 435

You deserved it 11 013

By Anonymous - 28/11/2011 03:00 - United States

Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 644

You deserved it 4 159

By Bailyboo - 26/01/2012 23:50 - United States

Today, I admitted my fear of small spaces to my boyfriend. His response was to immediately lock me in the hall closet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 169

You deserved it 4 767

By noooo - 08/08/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 022

You deserved it 2 707

By Lizofsmeg - 11/05/2012 05:03 - United States

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's flat. As I came out of the toilet he walked over, took my hand, looked at me and whispered, "You washed your hands. Good." in an extremely creepy manner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 220

You deserved it 3 226

By Anonymous - 22/10/2012 03:19 - United States

Today, I got to drop off my boyfriend at his newest place of residence: jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 247

You deserved it 5 171

By MaydayManic - 10/08/2011 13:11 - United States

Today, I finally went to my boyfriend's house to meet his family. When they were giving me a tour of the house, I noticed a Nazi flag on my boyfriend's bedroom door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 077

You deserved it 5 048

By Wet dreamer - 17/01/2018 19:00

Today, I slept in my boyfriend's room for the first time. I also wet the bed for the first time in a decade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 937

You deserved it 778

renaee 13

Friday 25 January 2013 23:21

*Shudders* In this case I wouldn't want to know what went on behind closed doors...

ghirahim 5

Friday 25 January 2013 23:22

LOL at op's name ! But that's seriously creepy...

Comments

Shmatterhorn 38

Friday 25 January 2013 23:33

He sounds like a keeper.

gc327072 30

Friday 25 January 2013 23:37

Oh god, that video is pure gold. "..Well ya know... grape just sorta sounds like... rape..." "UGH! GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER, SIR!"

perdix 29

Friday 25 January 2013 23:40

**** him willingly and you'll ruin his rape fantasy. Joke's on him! Hahahaha!

TheDrifter 23

Friday 25 January 2013 23:49

Don't forget to give him a safe word before you start on him. Oh, and untie him after, things get awkward if you forget. It does seem awkward that he put a sign up to let his mom know what he wants you to do to him though, be sure to correct that behavior before you leave.

Ponecake 18

Saturday 26 January 2013 2:02

FLǕGGȦ∂NKđ€ČHIŒβǾLʃÊN

_Burnett89 9

Friday 25 January 2013 23:52

Obviously wasn't that serious if you're now sitting here posting about it on here

Tempest151 11

Saturday 26 January 2013 0:02

You're probably the first girl he ever tricked into going back to his room.

KiddNYC1O 20

Saturday 26 January 2013 0:11

What did he say? "Oh, sorry, typo. Rap, it's rap".

DocBastard 38

Saturday 26 January 2013 0:14

I'm guessing your new boyfriend is a teenager, because no adult in his right mind would have anything taped to his bedroom door. If that's the case, he probably has a twisted sense of humour and you need not worry. If he IS an adult, you should be prepared to rub the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again.