Love: Today, I was making out with my boyfriend, when the Taco Bell...

By Aphrodite - 23/01/2010 21:13 - France

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend, when the Taco Bell I'd eaten for lunch came back up for round two. Undigested rice and beans got stuck in his hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 141

You deserved it 7 743

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By ColdHeat - 16/04/2011 19:18 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. His partly digested nachos decided to make an appearance halfway through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 305

You deserved it 4 636

By serendipity1027 - 30/10/2010 13:40 - France

Today, while my boyfriend and I were fighting in the car, I paused to take a bite of my burrito. Just at that moment, he slammed on the brakes, causing me to deepthroat my burrito. I threw up all over myself. He won the argument. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 824

You deserved it 8 895

By kady - 04/01/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was holding my hair back while I threw up. The smell then reached him and caused him to throw up in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 944

You deserved it 6 641

Taco Bell, huh?

By tanya - 25/10/2010 12:32 - Canada

Today, I was in a rush and forgot to flush the toilet after taking a huge dump. After coming home from work, I checked my Facebook to find myself tagged by my boyfriend in a photo. The photo was of the toilet, with the caption, "This is what Taco Bell does." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 155

You deserved it 41 034

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 493

You deserved it 318

By Anonymous - 28/11/2017 15:00

Today, I saw my 32-year-old boyfriend of 4 years pick his nose and eat it. The booger in question was attached to his nose and he sucked it out spaghetti-style. He then tried to kiss me. I still feel my stomach churning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 147

You deserved it 588

By HaleyIsabelle - 08/03/2010 20:54 - France

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 462

You deserved it 3 712

By Pierceew - 19/09/2009 05:22 - United States

Today, after making out with this guy, our tongue piercings got stuck together. After about five minutes of trying to unlock them, I accidentally vomited a little in his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 605

You deserved it 37 809

By SMS123 - 25/06/2010 19:42 - United States

Today, I was eating lunch with my boyfriend when I started choking. My boyfriend took it as an opportunity to sneak food off my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 482

You deserved it 4 789

DINOSAURS!!

By Anonymous - 13/04/2020 23:00

Today, I tried to cook an extra healthy, vegetable filled meal for my boyfriend and I. Not only did we notice the vegetables were off a little too late, but he also found my hair in his bowl. We had to settle for turkey dinosaurs and spaghetti loops instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 150

You deserved it 900

davidhasmorefun 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 2:04

so I am guessing he didn't go south of the border after that.

HoesInaBox 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 2:01

how did you not feel it coming? >.< FHL

Comments

zelly05 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 7:48

eewww FHL

omgtooweird 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 8:25

**** ur life, u didnt get thrown up on. i feel foe him. **** his life

xloveissuicidex 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 8:57

Can I Have A Makeout Session Like That? Haha Yummm;D

captaintaco 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 12:49

YDI for posting this on here for me to read while I was at taco bell. oh the irony.

ndiesal 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 15:34

For him, n

ndiesal 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 15:36

Shit... typing on an iTouch - somehow bumped the save button But anyway, for him, making out will never be the same (at least with you anyway lol)

Ownord_fml 10

Sunday 24 January 2010 15:57

There is a Taco Bell in France ?!!!! :D In Paris I guess.. Well, anyway FYL (both of you) ^^

Bloonbloon 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 16:31

Thanks for sharing. Ugh

NewJoisey 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 16:54

@Ownord. No, she does not live in France. FML does not share locations and their headquarters is apparently in France, as stated above by the staff.

Ownord_fml 10

Monday 25 January 2010 19:36

Thanks for pointing it out to me ! Though they usually put it in "Nord-Pas-de-Calais", not in "Île-de-France" so I was tricked D:

EgonSpengler 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 16:59

seriously why does FML have so many stories about vomiting? why are you all vomiting you disgusting bastards?

DonkeyDelight 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 17:32

What so you don't vomit?

EgonSpengler 0

Monday 25 January 2010 16:27

i vomit when i'm sick. i dont vomit at the drop of a hat you *******

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, my roommate drew a giant red penis and scrotum on our refrigerator, using what he thought was a dry erase marker. It was a permanent marker. I just renewed my lease. I get to look at a red penis every day for the next year and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 216

You deserved it 5 147

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 63

The Top

Today, I found out you really can burn down a kitchen by boiling an egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 474

You deserved it 840

Today, I'm confused. My incredibly hot coworkers thought I was repulsive for the past two years, but now that they've heard through the grapevine that I'm in a serious relationship, they won't leave me alone. I can't get through the day without being hit on. I hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 165

Today, after finishing a bottle and a half of pure cranberry juice to flush my bladder for a possible infection, I've been spewing liquid shits all day, my asshole burns and it hurts to sit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 545

You deserved it 5 753

Today, my boyfriend came in my room dressed as Harry Potter and declared that he was going to put his basilisk into my chamber of secrets. And yes, that was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 261

You deserved it 8 253

Today, my son no longer tries to sneak in and out of the house at inappropriate times. Now, he just brazenly walks out, ignoring me when I ask where he’s going, then walks back in at like 4 in the morning, and again ignores me because he’s still on his phone to someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 1 052

Today, as I was texting a friend, I was going to warm up some cold pizza. As I got finished with a text I put the pizza in the microwave and set the timer. After the timer ran out, I opened the door and smelled burnt plastic. Turns out phones aren't meant to be in the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 248

You deserved it 61 675

Same thing different taste

Taco Bell, huh?

The Taste of Love

DINOSAURS!!

Top comments

Comments