Health, Embarrassing and Love: Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After...

By Anonymous - 17/08/2010 07:10 - United States

Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 602

You deserved it 4 901

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Same thing different taste

Hott

By hotheadslav - 21/06/2015 01:59 - United States - Warsaw

Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door, I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it, so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably, shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 923

You deserved it 4 504

By SaMike - 01/09/2009 01:12 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 742

You deserved it 4 743

Could go either way, tbh

By Anonymous - 14/09/2024 12:00 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, while on a first date, I leaned in to kiss her, but my lips somehow brushed against her nose instead. I panicked and ended up kissing her forehead like a grandma saying goodbye to a child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 321

Sharing is caring

By Anonymous - 11/08/2021 00:01

Today, I was making out with this guy when my nose started bleeding, and it got on his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 100

By stoych - 08/10/2012 07:14 - United Kingdom

Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 094

You deserved it 5 961

By Anonymous - 25/05/2019 20:03

Today, I went straight from a kickboxing class to a first date. I coughed and a tooth that must have been knocked loose during free sparring fell into my hand, and I got blood on my shirt and the table. My date had a blood phobia and passed out, breaking her own front tooth on the table edge FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 334

You deserved it 405

First dates

By Tytonic - 20/01/2020 05:00 - United States - Havertown

Today, after my first dinner with my new girlfriend, I was using a toothpick when I fell, stabbing the roof of my mouth. She then laughed at me, as there was so much blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 869

You deserved it 413

By alisaav - 08/08/2014 07:40 - Thailand

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 267

You deserved it 13 656

By RitaDahhlinnnng - 25/08/2009 23:56 - United States

Today, I had my first real date with my first serious boyfriend. I was nervous because from past experience. I learned my lips were a bit ticklish and I usually giggled a bit during kissing. Well, we started making out and I thought was I doing pretty good hiding my laughs. Until I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 010

You deserved it 10 831

By Anon - 30/01/2009 11:39 - Canada

Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 342

You deserved it 7 441

Vehicle 1

Tuesday 17 August 2010 16:12

one time my nose randomly started bleeding when I was making out with someone and we just laughed about it. if she is worth your time she will understand.

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 17 August 2010 16:12

you bloody idiot

Comments

capnbzarr 43

Tuesday 17 August 2010 20:04

Could be worse--you could be Stan Marsh. At least blood doesn't smell as bad as vomit. Pretty funny, though.

BrittanyBamWooo 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 21:08

42 WTF XD hahahha

artisticninja713 13

Tuesday 17 August 2010 21:10

From a nerds pov that is so win.

j5p332 6

Tuesday 17 August 2010 21:20

dude, get your blood pressure checked...

blahzz 4

Tuesday 17 August 2010 21:39

So when you go down on her is that shit gonna pour outta your nose like a flood?

WTFuckles 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 22:09

Shove a tampon up your nose next time, it's great for nosebleeds.

nerdsgetmehot 22

Tuesday 17 August 2010 23:24

#100 Actually, they really are! They're meant to be absorbent (obviously), so they do the trick...

alienbread 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 23:04

could be worse you could have farted in her ear.

Ju99ernaut94 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 23:45

it wouldve been ironic if her name was Mary lol Bloody Mary

snoopcatt12 0

Wednesday 18 August 2010 0:09

I hate to say it but i must.... "white people"

foreverspellman 0

Wednesday 18 August 2010 0:33

hmm... just tell her your nose was manstrating. I'm sure she will understand. just explain that guys are different, instead of bleeding out through the vajayjay like girls, we bleed through our faces from time to time.