Intimacy: Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with...

By killmenow - 10/09/2012 17:52 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 276

You deserved it 77 688

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By imustbegay - 09/05/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 361

You deserved it 10 405

By Marc - 06/02/2012 21:43 - United States

Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 941

You deserved it 2 189

Crusin' for a bruisin'

By burr415 - 20/04/2012 22:55 - Sweden - Hägersten

Today, my friend was waiting outside the store while I bought a newspaper. Through the window, I saw two guys getting physical with him, so I went outside and they took off. I muttered, "Yeah, I thought so." They then turned around and beat the crap out of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 660

You deserved it 26 443

By Anonymous - 24/07/2013 20:56 - United States - South Hadley

Today, I was buying condoms but was a little embarrassed so I went to the self-check. I scanned the condoms, then a magazine and tried to put the condoms under the magazines to hide them. The store guy saw me, thought I was shoplifting and I was kicked out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 846

You deserved it 15 941

By RahiYeah09 - 17/09/2009 18:45 - United States

Today, I was in the 'intimacy' section of Walmart. After grabbing 2 boxes of condoms and a vibrating ring I turn around to see my ex boyfriend's mom. I smile awkwardly and put my head down as I walk away, causing me to colide with his dad and send my 'goodies' all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 281

You deserved it 7 193

Shy boy

By Oops - 24/10/2009 13:14 - United Kingdom

Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 988

You deserved it 6 825

Awkward

By Anonymous - 07/01/2012 06:30 - United States

Today, I found out what it's like to have your boyfriend's mom find your hidden stash of condoms in your car, then spend the next two hours shopping with her. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 597

You deserved it 7 233

By anonymous22kittylicklick - 20/08/2011 04:44 - United States

Today, I was at Target deciding what chap-stick to get when an old lady violently hit me with her umbrella and kept yelling at me saying, "You are too young for this! Think twice!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 486

You deserved it 2 845

Considerate

By BadLuckLad - 22/10/2014 22:38 - United Kingdom - Portsmouth

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 390

You deserved it 3 890

By Anonymous - 31/12/2015 22:33 - United States - Washington Crossing

Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 807

You deserved it 7 451

MonsterCommenter 4

Tuesday 11 September 2012 2:09

You sir, have reached level 99 of Assholishness and YDI.

mpsteve137 15

Tuesday 11 September 2012 2:10

I wish I could hit YDI twice. Douche.

Comments

Mysterion345 11

Tuesday 11 September 2012 6:20

Did the guy have like super hearing or something I mean shit if you muttered it then he shouldn't have heard it. Now on the other hand if you yelled it..... but seriously charge that bitch with assault.

HungerGames95 13

Tuesday 11 September 2012 6:22

Yes god forbid she not have more children.

bananahammock9 0

Tuesday 11 September 2012 6:30

Well considering it was 100% none of your business... YDI Who are you to judge anyone? How do you know she was even a teenager? I'm 30 yet i look like I'm barely 20. And FYI not ALL teen parents are the same.

naughtylez82 4

Tuesday 11 September 2012 6:34

Haha ydi

22wafflesXbabe22 0

Tuesday 11 September 2012 6:48

You sir, are a douche bag. Just sayin.

brewmasterg 34

Tuesday 11 September 2012 6:53

Looks like she learnt her lesson. Did you?

Mauskau 35

Tuesday 11 September 2012 7:15

I'd've done the same because I know a girl like that, but only if I know them.

mahli08 6

Tuesday 11 September 2012 7:35

You deserve it for being a douche. You know nothing about her or her circumstances. The kids could have been her siblings or she could have been raped. Even if they are her kids, Who cares, as long as she is a good mum.

xgetxbentx 13

Tuesday 11 September 2012 7:42

Ydi, it's really never "too late" to start using protection, at least she's learned her lesson, assuming that they're even her kids and not her younger cousins, siblings, nieces/nephews or kids that she's babysitting.