Love: Today, I was stuck sitting at a cafeteria table next to the girl...

By WishesWasDeaf - 31/01/2010 01:35 - United States

Today, I was stuck sitting at a cafeteria table next to the girl who broke my heart and her boyfriend. I got to overhear the conversation, which included, "I want to go to the car" followed by, "Me too, but I don't have a condom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 844

You deserved it 3 384

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Same thing different taste

Considerate

By BadLuckLad - 22/10/2014 22:38 - United Kingdom - Portsmouth

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 390

You deserved it 3 890

By ditched?? - 06/08/2010 09:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were driving around town in his car. To my surprise he took me out to lunch. As we were leaving, a girl walks up and asks if he had room for one more for a ride, sadly he only has two seats in his car. Guess who had to walk! FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 364

You deserved it 5 717

By killmenow - 10/09/2012 17:52 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 276

You deserved it 77 687

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 22:18 - United States

Today, driving home, my girlfriend and I decided we were finally going to have sex. We got in the backseat, then I opened my condom to find it was already broken. We ended up playing connect four instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 735

You deserved it 5 684

Awkward

By Anonymous - 07/01/2012 06:30 - United States

Today, I found out what it's like to have your boyfriend's mom find your hidden stash of condoms in your car, then spend the next two hours shopping with her. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 597

You deserved it 7 233

By socialix - 19/04/2015 01:03 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 724

You deserved it 3 424

What the F, lady?

By Anonymous - 01/09/2012 00:49 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, the girl I went on an awkward date with two weeks ago showed up at university and started smashing my car with a bat. She then broke down in tears and alternated between declaring her love, and cussing me out for "cheating" on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 195

You deserved it 2 500

By marmarr - 15/05/2011 05:20 - United States

Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down I received a text that said, "Turn around." It was her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 503

You deserved it 70 830

By ish - 14/08/2009 04:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me in the parking lot right before a baseball game, then convinced me to still go to the game in tears. After the game, we were walking back to the car and he goes, "so, how about some break up lovin'?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 915

You deserved it 9 283

I'm not the main character in this scene

By Anonymous - 21/12/2023 00:00 - Norway

Today, I went to the movies with a girl I like, then we went to grab a bite afterwards. She spent most of the time telling me how much she dislikes my best friend because he hooked up with a new girl. I then found out the two had been "talking" for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 114

blkwhtrbbt 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 9:32

why didn't you move? stuck how? like some prankster glued you to the seat?

nom_nom_nom 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 10:03

awww ): Who says that she was his ex girlfriend, though? Maybe she turned him down. Either way, that sucks, bro. I hope things get better for you. Then maybe she'll be jealous.

Comments

SnickerVonBicker 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 13:09

perdix, its all about serena

headphone84 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 14:38

get over it! if they don't do it in their car then they will do it somewhere else. either way you get nothing

tj41567 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 14:47

I would not turn into a psyco shoot him in the car and finish screwing the girl but it's a thought

QueenCrunch 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 15:04

Well, if she gets pregnant...is that revenge enough for you?

DeepSouthEmo 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 15:29

Shoot them until they team-kill you then boot them from the table. it works every time

dckbtch 2

Sunday 31 January 2010 15:54

just move away! or tell your mommy. whatever floats your boat.

DeepSouthEmo 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 16:07

confucious say: man who fish in other mans well often catch crabs

xiFlyx 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 20:20

LMAO that made me lol 

linamerri 0

Wednesday 17 March 2010 6:25

cumdumpster

linkjp 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 16:16

Find someone else, sometimes things don't work the way you want.

arizdegenerate 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 17:00

I would've gotten up, took a condom out of my wallet, turned around and handed to the guy then said " **** her, I did." Make her look like the **** she is and let him know he's getting your sloppy seconds