Work: Today, I was talking to my boss and he said I was awesome. He...

By missedfistbump - 20/03/2013 14:31 - United States

Today, I was talking to my boss and he said I was awesome. He went to fist bump me and I missed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 625

You deserved it 8 678

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By KN - 25/06/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 887

You deserved it 12 554

By Anonymous - 03/02/2016 15:06 - United States - Ventura

Today, after a badly misjudged hand signal, I accidentally hit my boss in the face instead of high-fiving her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 222

You deserved it 3 163

Dat ass

By brandonborgie - 10/08/2021 04:01 - Australia

Today, my boss slapped me on the ass and said, "Good work, princess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 260

You deserved it 126

By ChrisC - 10/07/2009 21:21 - United States

Today, my boss came to my cubicle to give me my annual performance bonus. I was asleep at my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 442

You deserved it 62 216

Nice to know

By Sarah - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 182

You deserved it 1 800

By gt - 23/09/2010 00:52 - Canada

Today, my boss fired me because I corrected him after he misspoke during a meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 799

You deserved it 35 785

Unnerved

By Greenskies - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - France - Corneilla-del-vercol

Today, I was talking to my boss at the end of an awesome internship. He said he was really satisfied with my work, and that he had considered hiring me. Turns out he decided not to because I smile too much, and it freaks him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 989

You deserved it 1 998

By Anonymous - 03/05/2013 15:00 - United States

Today, my boss fired me for acting "inappropriately" at work. I gave him a hug. He's my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 301

You deserved it 8 686

By Anonymous - 08/07/2016 22:09

Today, my boss reprimanded me for a huge screw-up that he was responsible for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 823

You deserved it 843

By Anonymous - 09/06/2014 21:20 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I went to work in my best outfit for the big corporate party we were having later in the day. When I arrived, my boss said, "You missed one hell of a party yesterday!" Shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 734

You deserved it 10 897

NessieMonster188 17

Wednesday 20 March 2013 18:54

I guess you're not so "awesome" after all

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 20 March 2013 18:56

So we went from a handshake in the 70's to a high-five in the 80's to a fist bump now. What the hell is next? "Hey, great job!" *grabs ankles*

Comments

ajeppsen 25

Wednesday 20 March 2013 21:36

You're boss sounds awesome.

kawaiisakura 12

Wednesday 20 March 2013 21:54

I'm not seeing much of an FML here...

jgriff79 23

Wednesday 20 March 2013 21:57

Here's looking at u kid.

meloman95 7

Wednesday 20 March 2013 21:57

lol that shit happened to me today too. Not with my boss though.

spikekutter 9

Wednesday 20 March 2013 22:19

why would a boss fist bump you after an interview.. thats really unprofessional..

fuckery16 13

Thursday 21 March 2013 3:30

read the fml over again

sonnyrosa 32

Thursday 21 March 2013 6:04

Calm down princess... not everyone is a corporate drone. My first interview out of college, my chef high fived me when he gave me the job.

pwnman 33

Thursday 21 March 2013 1:48

Well, all what I must say OP is; act like your dizzy the next day you go to work. That-a-way, your boss can understand.

Lvl_8 7

Thursday 21 March 2013 3:22

-8 Charisma

Ayanpatel95 7

Thursday 21 March 2013 5:12

U hit his face

maszaros 9

Thursday 21 March 2013 5:34

Who cares?

thehowiie 6

Thursday 21 March 2013 5:48

guess who's fired?

Keywords

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Today, my laptop was slow so I used my husband’s laptop. I went to the bedroom and found it opened, so I moved the trackpad and it powered on. The first thing I see is a page with redhead porn, and another tab with nude redheads. You know who else is a redhead? The new girl at his job he tells me not to worry about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 132

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I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, I’ve noticed that my boyfriend gets progressively more short-tempered and grumpy as time goes on, until we get to the Friday before we drop my kids off at their dad's house, then for that weekend he’s downright happy, until we have to pick them up Sunday night then he starts getting grumpy again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 142

You deserved it 669

Today, I watched my mother pull her pants down and, using her hands, feel her butt crack to check if she'd had had an accident. She then pulled her pants up, went into the kitchen and touched stuff in the refrigerator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 276

You deserved it 339

Today, I found out that the doctors accidentally perforated my left ear drum performing a routine wax syringing. I was at the doctor's for a completely different reason, having crushed my pinky at the gym. They can't fix either and my finger needs surgery, which can't happen until next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 915

You deserved it 143

Today, my mother-in-law told my fiancé that I had to leave and wasn’t allowed to live there anymore. I own the house. She’s mad because I locked the door so she couldn't walk in anytime she wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 941

You deserved it 357

Today, my husband and I once again argued over expiration dates. He says I’m paranoid and wasteful. I finally gave in and ate some food I wasn’t so sure of. Well, his innards must be made of vibranium because I’m currently in the fetal position on the bathroom floor after puking for an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 988

You deserved it 278

Today, I was turned down for a job as a cashier at Best Buy. I worked like hell to get into and then graduate from one of the top Telecommunication schools in the country. I spent all my time with extracurriculars to help my resume instead of partying like my friends. I can't even be a cashier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 406

You deserved it 4 295

Same thing different taste

Dat ass

Nice to know

Unnerved

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