Miscellaneous: Today, I was the designated driver. It was also my birthday party.... - FML

By Anonymous - 06/07/2011 11:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I was the designated driver. It was also my birthday party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 201

You deserved it 5 410

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By thedd - 18/08/2009 04:44 - United States

Today, it's my 21st birthday. All my friends showed up at my house already drunk, so I had to be the designated driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 169

You deserved it 3 901

By happy bday - 17/09/2010 04:02 - Canada

Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I'm now in charge of driving my friends home after they've had an awesome night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 003

You deserved it 9 396

By Anonymous - 15/10/2011 18:54 - United States

Today, I learned that when I got my driver's permit, I agreed to be the designated driver for my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 360

You deserved it 4 244

By Starter656 - 24/12/2017 06:00

Today, I'm the designated driver for a Christmas party I wasn't even invited to. Not only do I get to watch people have a good time, but I'm also supposed to not get involved in the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 393

You deserved it 816

By IhatebeingtheDD - 15/10/2010 14:08 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver for my friend's 21st birthday. On the way home from the bar, he threw up all the pasta and tequila he'd had onto the back seat of my car, and told me it was part of his whole party plan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 452

You deserved it 4 086

By Anonymous - 25/08/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 146

You deserved it 3 487

Booze don't cure the blues

By Anonymous - 18/02/2021 07:58 - United States - Edison

Today, it was my birthday, and even the person who seemed excited about me finally turning 21 and can legally drink forgot. Guess who got drunk alone tonight? This guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 168

By BirthdayBoy - 28/03/2015 03:42 - United States - Madison

Today, I was uninvited from my own birthday party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 984

You deserved it 3 144

Party hard

By Coldflame - 06/03/2010 15:22 - United States

Today, I was designated driver for my friends. This entailed standing around in the cold for 3 hours, not drinking, dealing with drunk people, and oh yeah, I almost forgot, cleaning up vomit from my hair, my clothes, and my new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 136

You deserved it 7 527

By good friend - 27/12/2013 06:35 - United States - Missoula

Today, my friends and I had our Christmas party. I ended up being the only one sober, and had to drive each and every person home. There were 15 of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 531

You deserved it 5 818

Next

Top comments

nahgemoohc 17

Wednesday 6 July 2011 15:59

shit!! well, happy birthday!!

NomOnShroomz 14

Wednesday 6 July 2011 16:02

Well hopefully you'll still get *musical note* birthday sex, birthday sex *musical note*.

Comments

annihil8or 15

Thursday 7 July 2011 4:20

Leave the bastards there and drive off

Relentless_J 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 4:28

that sucks for you, but you kinda deserve it for agreeing to be DD.

GrahamAker 3

Thursday 7 July 2011 5:01

so?

i_eat_you_now 3

Thursday 7 July 2011 6:59

WHAT?

KODIREYES 2

Thursday 7 July 2011 9:55

your friends are messed up

TrollinAllDay 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 10:11

Should just got drunk and wing it.

modernknight 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 10:29

don't feel bad, I spent my entire 21st year in Iraq. when we finally got back my friends threw me a Bday party, plus going away party, and designated me as dd as well. that's the infantry for ya!

mArkoman134 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 12:09

happy late bday?

pinkredneck30 2

Thursday 7 July 2011 14:26

sorry dude. happy birthday..... i'll be your desi driver next time. I know it sucks when the celebration is for you but everyone parties for themselves. at least you had a party. haven't had one for me since I was 12.... I'm 32! I'm not the party type, but that's one day a year where I would love too. but I know it would end up the way yours did. family... got to love them... or do you? lol

Anna_conda 2

Thursday 7 July 2011 15:40

Lol I know how that feels OP - I wasn't allowed to drink at my birthday party because I had to be designated driver for my Dad after his work Christmas party which happened to be on the same night. :-(

5
6
7
8
9
10
11

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight

The Top

Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 646

You deserved it 80

Today, I wanted to show my friends my cat’s “high-five” trick. I held out my hand, and instead of a high-five, my cat scratched and bit me instead. I yelped, and my friends burst into laughter. I had to bandage my hand, all whilst they joked about “cat training.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 375

The Top

Today, I got demoted at my job. Instead of working with patients, they want me to file. The thing is, I'm a volunteer; I work for them for free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 059

You deserved it 3 788

Today, yet again I was made to feel how talentless and boring of a person I am. I have great academic achievements, making me one among the top 0.02% youth of my country, but am so uninteresting and introverted that people don't want to be friends with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 735

You deserved it 239

Today, I'm travelling across the country with my family. My grandma thought it would be a good idea to take her shoes off. It's been 5 minutes and my eyes are watering from the stench. We still have over 200 miles left until we get home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 981

You deserved it 1 573

Today, my ex broke up with me because his mom didn't like me. He was visiting me across the country at the time, and still had a few days left. He had the audacity to still ask to sleep with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 68

Today, it's my 18th birthday. As I moved out of home to study, and currently spend 95% of my wage on rent, I asked my mother for any amount of money as my gift. I desperately need new shoes and underwear, and haven't eaten for two days. Instead, I got a pair of earrings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 940

You deserved it 578

Today, in a restaurant, staff asked me to fix my skirt because multiple customers complained my buttcrack was putting them off their food. I thought the waiter was using fake complaints to justify his rudeness, but when I got up to fix it fully, half the restaurant applauded me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 2 040