Love: Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when...

By Scottrick - 01/03/2009 17:55 - United States

Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 146

You deserved it 15 623

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By twit - 16/03/2009 01:14 - United States

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 237 618

You deserved it 39 125

By erockinthesuburb - 19/02/2013 01:49 - United States

Today, I purchased a box of girl scout cookies from a coworker. I wanted to save them for later at home, so I placed them on my desk and then headed to a meeting. When I returned, there was an empty box sitting there with a post-it note saying, "Thanks!" Nobody will own up to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 437

You deserved it 6 356

Annoyed

By musicman2005 - 30/03/2009 04:41 - United States

Today, I was at work, about to go to lunch. There were some girl scouts out front selling cookies. I told my manager that I would be using a different exit, and when he asked why, I told him that girl scouts really annoy the crap out of me. The girl scouts out front were his daughters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 945

You deserved it 64 520

By hatemylife - 19/07/2011 06:24 - United States

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 044

You deserved it 6 954

Kinder stranger

By Me. - 11/04/2013 00:45 - United States - Ramona

Today, as I walked out of the local store, I noticed a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudged her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needed it more than me. After looking at it, she yelled, "PEDOPHILE!", punched me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 461

You deserved it 12 717

By Anonymous - 26/06/2010 00:29 - United States

Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 521

You deserved it 51 617

Freak in the streets…

By grocerystalker - 16/11/2012 05:58 - Australia - Newcastle

Today, I spotted a girl I have a crush on while grocery shopping. Before I could go over and say hi, I noticed her walk over and stroke a few kitchen knives through plastic wrapping. Then I spotted her in the dog food section sniffing rawhide bones with her eyes closed, looking very happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 518

You deserved it 3 432

By grossesfesses - 15/05/2013 06:58 - France - Compi?gne

Today, in the doctor's waiting room, a little boy asked me for a cookie. I told him that I didn't have any. He replied, "But my mom says that ladies with big butts always have cookies in their handbags." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 876

You deserved it 6 422

Yummy

By Sisi - 29/08/2016 16:49 - United States - Mesa

Today, my roommate left a bomb looking package of cookies on the kitchen counter. My sweet tooth got the best of me and I made that split second decision of, "Oh, I'll just have one." Halfway through it, I noticed the fine print, "For dogs" on the package. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 519

You deserved it 11 328

Snack time

By oops... - 12/09/2014 05:50 - Canada - Sylvan Lake

Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 606

You deserved it 29 762

lamarr 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 20:05

lmao i love how excited you got over cookies

Fleur_fml 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 20:03

Seems like you had some explaining to do. xD

Comments

scb197 0

Monday 2 March 2009 21:55

damn all ya'll, now i have a hankerin for thin mints

inextremisdream 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 1:59

This is my FAVOURITE. XD

jreece22 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 3:19

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

ohguru 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 8:30

best one i've read in awhile. hopefully she understood!

ajscott 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 11:52

#2: double entendre intended?

kbtoys 2

Tuesday 3 March 2009 13:15

Classic case of hilariously poor timing. ;)

TheKitchenSink 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 16:26

This is the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life.

EmoGeo 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 22:02

Oh snap. that's hilarious.

Pjbc 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 22:11

hahahahhahhaahhahaha YEAH! giggle

Vonnick 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 0:34

What is this I don't even... I love stealing phrases.

Keywords

Cheating Love Relatable Work Money My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

USA, USA, USA, and more precisely Philadelphia. That's where we're landing today. When I first discovered Justin, on 9gag or an awesome website like that, I knew exactly this little guy was perfect to fit in the FML illustrated section. His crazy, c...

I agree, your life sucks 8

You deserved it 8

Hello, you lovely people! This week is yet again brought to you from our French website, so strap some baguettes on your arms, get the accordion out of storage and assume the mandatory position. While you do so, we’ll be off skateboarding, and the...

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 3

The Top

Today, I had amazing sex with my new boyfriend. Later, my husband told me I'd betrayed him, even though he had told me it was okay, because he heard it. I’ve been forced to hear to him through the thin walls of our house, having sex with my ex, for almost a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 098

You deserved it 2 244

Today, I had awful morning sickness, and I asked my husband if he'd get me a drink while I went to the bathroom. On the way back, I witnessed him spitting in the glass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 541

You deserved it 2 924

Today, while watching The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh with my 5 year-old, I realized why the kangaroo's name is Kanga, and why her son's name is Roo. Kanga-Roo. Get it? Yeah. I didn't until today. I'm 47. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 597

You deserved it 52 889

Today, my landlord emailed me, stating that she hasn't been receiving my rent. After some investigation, I found out she's been using the money to buy booze, and hasn't been putting it into the house owner's account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 909

You deserved it 2 888

Today, my 16 year-old son has to sue his great uncle and step aunt for theft and extortion of his father's estate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 283

You deserved it 94

Today, I was talking about an essay I'd written for a class that was due to be turned in online days ago. I thought mine was well written and I'd even finished it a couple of days early so I wouldn't forget about it. After a few minutes of talking and feeling proud, I realized that I forgot to turn it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 440

You deserved it 9 200