Intimacy: Today, I was walking through Macy's with my girlfriend. I stopped...

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By Noname - 17/03/2009 10:16 - United States

Today, I was walking through Macy's with my girlfriend. I stopped to admire a mannequin's ass, joking with my girlfriend like I was touching it. Then I slapped it. It wasn't a mannequin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 666

You deserved it 211 452

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Same thing different taste

By ohcrap - 02/06/2011 10:05 - United States

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 253

You deserved it 36 418

Christmas shopping

By Anonymous - 26/12/2019 20:00

Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 315

You deserved it 228

By notmydad. - 08/05/2010 10:07 - Philippines

Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 267

You deserved it 3 678

By pizzafreak18 - 21/06/2010 14:21 - United States

Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 078

You deserved it 55 000

Comforting

By imaginationdarling - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Phoenix

Today, I was at my retail job and we had to change the mannequin's outfit. I had to hold her while my manager grabbed the new outfit. I rested my head on her naked plastic chest, and it was the closest I've got to affection in years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 773

You deserved it 7 378

Been there, done that

By Christine - 30/12/2024 15:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I mistook a mannequin in a store for a real person and apologized when I bumped into it. A staff member saw and said, "Don’t worry, he’s used to it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 116

By grabber - 09/08/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 365

You deserved it 11 015

By Anonymous - 24/07/2009 19:06 - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my friend when I saw my boyfriend in Victoria's Secret - with another girl. They were joking and laughing, and I was really pissed off. So I stormed into the store and slapped him. He looked up at me with an angry and confused expression. It wasn't my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 885

You deserved it 91 393

Classic move

By Anonymous - 01/04/2022 20:00 - Canada - Saint-jérôme

Today, I walked up to my friend and slapped her ass, because that’s what we always do. Turns out, it wasn’t my friend, it was a total stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 1 229

By anon - 05/04/2017 04:00

Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 725

You deserved it 764

dammn 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 20:02

HAHAHAHAHAHAH , smooth . did she slap you back ?

amirn86 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 20:03

How do you not realize that someone is alive LOL Ditto #1

Comments

Classic_ 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 3:58

are u insane...must have been a hard ass for it not to be noticable

konekohotaru 0

Monday 30 March 2009 1:54

How do you not notice that?

nnnnn12345 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 6:01

that's hillarious, you retard

usmcprill 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 5:27

wow. really, just...wow. how can you not tell the difference between a mannequin and a human. I hope she hit you really hard for that. YDI

master_fml 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 10:10

i love how next to this page there is an ad for realistic mannequins lol

michserena8002 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 9:51

OMG my man has done that crap to me too.. lol

ChrisCrimson 0

Friday 17 April 2009 5:46

For future reference Noname's stories are all made up.

KittyKUNTagious 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 2:03

Wow, awkward thing is, there is a pic of some mannequin's for sale too.

dirtskootin713 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 7:40

so wat yo gf do?

FreakOnaLeash 0

Friday 24 April 2009 2:25

LOL

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 27 441

You deserved it 11 394

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You deserved it 4 849

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 140

You deserved it 304

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I agree, your life sucks 28 919

You deserved it 3 172

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I agree, your life sucks 70 585

You deserved it 688 863

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I agree, your life sucks 829

You deserved it 204

Today, I had to give a 63 year old man a shot. He started bawling before I even brought out the needle. I tried to get him calm down. Then he grabbed the needle, threw it at me and ran out the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 803

You deserved it 3 228

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I agree, your life sucks 1 762

You deserved it 174