Miscellaneous: Today, I was yelled at by my mum for not wanting to get a spray...

By vampire - 16/06/2011 20:53 - United Kingdom

Today, I was yelled at by my mum for not wanting to get a spray tan for my cousin's wedding because if I don't, I will "shine like a beacon of disrespect" among the other attendees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 398

You deserved it 3 572

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous Cunt - 24/11/2012 19:38 - Netherlands - Blaricum

Today, my mom had a tantrum and screamed at me over my use of bronzer. She called me a selfish bitch and claimed that I'm somehow slowly giving myself skin cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 013

You deserved it 17 625

By Sally - 22/08/2011 00:17 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 899

You deserved it 69 426

You what now?

By ashley anne - 16/10/2022 04:00

Today, I was called a wimp for getting a sunburn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 150

By fuck you retail - 27/05/2013 20:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a girl at my tanning salon was ranting about how expensive it was and how she wished there was a cheaper way to get a tan. I joked, "Like from the sun?" She angrily called me a "sassy bitch", screamed to my boss about me, and then threatened to sue us when he kicked her out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 609

You deserved it 4 547

By Anonymous - 17/01/2014 23:52 - United Kingdom

Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 043

You deserved it 6 792

Besties for life

By no cake for me - 07/11/2012 07:31 - United States - Jackson Heights

Today, my best friend told me that I wasn't invited to her wedding, saying that I was too pretty and that I would outshine her at the ceremony. I laughed and said that she was being ridiculous. She eventually confessed the real reason why I wasn't invited: apparently I'm an annoying bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 850

You deserved it 26 048

Bridezilla

By Anonymous - 29/05/2022 04:00

Today, I’m supposed to be a bridesmaid at my sister's wedding, but she doesn’t want me in the photos because I’m over a foot taller than her and the other bridesmaids, and it will look silly in the photos. I told her I won’t even bother attending, and mom actually took her side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 157

You deserved it 111

By deadmedia - 30/08/2009 00:39 - Canada

Today, my best friend informed me that I could not be her maid of honour because I "wasn't as pretty as the other bridesmaids" and she wanted her wedding photos to have "consistency". FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 011

You deserved it 3 869

By wat - 20/09/2013 05:52 - United States - Santa Ana

Today, I went to visit my overly-posh mother for the first time in many years. Upon arrival, she kicked me out because my outfit did not follow the same color-scheme as her decor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 707

You deserved it 3 302

Doormat blues

By Anonymous - 11/05/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, my mom spent an hour lecturing me on how I'm a doormat who lets people walk all over me, and that I needed to be more assertive. So I stood up and told my dad, no, I am not going on that forestry camp he wants me to go to. Mom sat silently by as he screamed and grounded me for the entire summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 116

L3Paparazzo 7

Friday 17 June 2011 1:52

its okay not to look like a Oompa Loompa :P

artc91 0

Friday 17 June 2011 2:00

Wow, i really can't figure out why that matters.

Comments

mansnoop 0

Friday 17 June 2011 6:22

jersey shore

mansnoop 0

Friday 17 June 2011 6:22

jersey shore

Consequences 0

Friday 17 June 2011 6:30

Should've not wasted your time going. Dont want to embarrass mum after all.

lovely220 0

Friday 17 June 2011 6:32

who's getting married? snooki?

xxLifexx 0

Friday 17 June 2011 6:53

hen i read this i totally thought Snookie but FYL for ur mom worrying about your looks , you might look good but what about her hmmmm?

Complaining 13

Friday 17 June 2011 7:02

That makes complete sense.

firestarter31 0

Friday 17 June 2011 7:08

dont british people melt when they tan?

elmski87 0

Friday 17 June 2011 8:20

well clearly not.

Ausha313Fierce 0

Friday 17 June 2011 7:31

Tanning is pointless anyway....

ncvolley123 8

Friday 17 June 2011 20:27

how would u know? Tanning doesnt really make a diffetence for u

ehssoccer 0

Friday 17 June 2011 7:51

hey I say mum too!

DrJesse 10

Friday 17 June 2011 8:08

how does not wanting a spray tan make her a hippie?

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The Top

Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 644

You deserved it 5 885

Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 540

You deserved it 51 165

The Top

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 789

You deserved it 2 554

Today, I went to the store to buy a phone I saw last week. I looked around a little first, then continued to the electronics section. I couldn't find the phone I saw, so I went to leave. Halfway to the exit, I was detained by security and grilled for ages over my "suspicious behaviour". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 169

You deserved it 3 687

Today, while working as a waitress, an attractive woman sat at one of my tables. When she paid, I decided to be bold and write my number and "Call me" on her receipt. She put in a complaint to my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 3 566

Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend. I called him and started yelling at him over the phone. He told me that if I wanted to end the relationship I should just hang up the phone right then. Before I could say I still love him and don't want to break up, my phone battery died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108 360

You deserved it 26 547

Today, I had to cancel a first date due to tornado weather. The guy texted me, saying never to contact him again, and then blocked me. This is the fourth time this exact scenario has happened to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 664

You deserved it 191

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 004

You deserved it 28 780