Miscellaneous: Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede,... - FML

By Anonymous - 26/09/2013 16:19 - United States - East Hampton

Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede, placed it on his tongue, and then swallowed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 761

You deserved it 3 610

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 11:55 - United States - Louisville

Today, I saw my dad pick his teeth with a toothpick from a new box. He ate the food he got out of his teeth and put the toothpick back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 609

You deserved it 2 893

By Anonymous - 19/03/2012 00:49 - United States - Dansville

Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 975

You deserved it 4 106

By UUUGHHH - 05/02/2016 20:33 - France - Villejuif

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 172

You deserved it 2 719

By yesikilledit - 20/11/2018 13:30

Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I tried to pick it off but it crawled into my hand and stabbed my skin with its sharp legs. I screamed like a little girl because I had a centipede on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 355

You deserved it 337

Happy meal

By ollierocks96 - 17/12/2009 21:43 - United States

Today, I was eating lunch outside with my friends, when a spider fell on one guy's back. I glanced at it and opened my mouth to warn him when another guy flicked it and it went into my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 559

You deserved it 3 026

Hair-raising

By what the fuck????? - 17/02/2022 16:01 - United States - Denver

Today, while at a restaurant, I watched in horror as my daughter picked a hair out of her food and continued eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 268

By feckingnasty - 26/01/2018 19:00

Today, I watched my husband pick his dead foot skin and say, "That's a keeper!" before putting it in his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 653

You deserved it 464

By thenotsomanlyman - 07/03/2011 16:17 - United States

Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 692

You deserved it 41 684

By rb - 01/05/2011 06:02 - United States

Today, I washed my hands and reached for the towel but felt something sticky. It was a house centipede. It exploded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 774

You deserved it 3 584

By somuchforthat - 19/02/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 706

You deserved it 2 519

Next

Top comments

rick1 8

Friday 27 September 2013 2:54

... Why would someone even willingly do that? Nasty.

sarah6786 14

Friday 27 September 2013 2:56

Protein. Several legged protein.

Comments

KylarStern19 7

Friday 27 September 2013 5:45

Is your dad Bear Grylls?

StormyZero 11

Friday 27 September 2013 5:46

Mmm protein.

worldclassrager 39

Friday 27 September 2013 5:53

Centipede's contain poison...I think...Docbastard would know better than me but anyway.... If they do contain poison I don't think your father would do that again...

swedeNix 13

Friday 27 September 2013 6:35

Proteins?:)

WhiteRaven16 7

Friday 27 September 2013 6:52

Ick. Think of the bacteria. But It could always be worse I guess.

immunetoinsanity 23

Friday 27 September 2013 7:04

Sounds like a nutritious snack to me, tell daddy grills to save me some!

immunetoinsanity 23

Friday 27 September 2013 7:05

That sounds delightful. Did it crunch? Those are my favorite. Almost like potato chips, but with a lot more protein.

norwegianboip 17

Friday 27 September 2013 7:31

What. The. ****.

bigmammajamma69 4

Friday 27 September 2013 10:27

I'd really love to know more about this guy...does he eat bugs regularly?

freezeangel 11

Friday 27 September 2013 10:38

I don't even...

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You deserved it 3 441

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I agree, your life sucks 48 464

You deserved it 5 679

Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down I received a text that said, "Turn around." It was her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 503

You deserved it 70 835