Miscellaneous: Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede,...

By Anonymous - 26/09/2013 16:19 - United States - East Hampton

Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede, placed it on his tongue, and then swallowed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 761

You deserved it 3 610

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 11:55 - United States - Louisville

Today, I saw my dad pick his teeth with a toothpick from a new box. He ate the food he got out of his teeth and put the toothpick back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 609

You deserved it 2 893

By Anonymous - 19/03/2012 00:49 - United States - Dansville

Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 975

You deserved it 4 106

By UUUGHHH - 05/02/2016 20:33 - France - Villejuif

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 172

You deserved it 2 719

By yesikilledit - 20/11/2018 13:30

Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I tried to pick it off but it crawled into my hand and stabbed my skin with its sharp legs. I screamed like a little girl because I had a centipede on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 355

You deserved it 337

Happy meal

By ollierocks96 - 17/12/2009 21:43 - United States

Today, I was eating lunch outside with my friends, when a spider fell on one guy's back. I glanced at it and opened my mouth to warn him when another guy flicked it and it went into my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 559

You deserved it 3 026

Hair-raising

By what the fuck????? - 17/02/2022 16:01 - United States - Denver

Today, while at a restaurant, I watched in horror as my daughter picked a hair out of her food and continued eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 268

By feckingnasty - 26/01/2018 19:00

Today, I watched my husband pick his dead foot skin and say, "That's a keeper!" before putting it in his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 653

You deserved it 464

By thenotsomanlyman - 07/03/2011 16:17 - United States

Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 692

You deserved it 41 684

By rb - 01/05/2011 06:02 - United States

Today, I washed my hands and reached for the towel but felt something sticky. It was a house centipede. It exploded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 774

You deserved it 3 584

By somuchforthat - 19/02/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 706

You deserved it 2 519

rick1 8

Friday 27 September 2013 2:54

... Why would someone even willingly do that? Nasty.

sarah6786 14

Friday 27 September 2013 2:56

Protein. Several legged protein.

Comments

sanecatlady 13

Friday 27 September 2013 3:18

I read that if you eat insects they have to be still alive or cooked while alive or immediately after being killed because they go bad really quickly, like lobsters. Although one centipede probably won't hurt him I hope your dad doesn't get sick.

ifavela89 13

Friday 27 September 2013 3:23

what did you say? maybe he likes bugs and it was suppose to be a secret lol

jw90 18

Friday 27 September 2013 3:33

Mmm protein

gracehi 31

Friday 27 September 2013 3:38

Today, I spent hours preparing a delicious meal of roast leg of lamb, complete with white wine glaze, gravy, and roast potatoes. I ate the meal with my grateful boyfriend, savoring every bite slowly, and going back for seconds, until I simply couldn't eat anymore. Feeling very satisfied, I decided to read some FMLs while I digested. I read one about a man who ate a centipede, and threw up every bite...my socks are soggy. FML

neeni88 23

Friday 27 September 2013 3:43

YDI. Don't you know by now that you shouldn't read FMLs while eating or digesting?

gracehi 31

Friday 27 September 2013 4:10

Well, I certainly do now.

gracehi 31

Friday 27 September 2013 6:37

Btw, just so everyone knows, this story is fictitious, written for entertainment...except for the part about the roasted lamb...it truly was delicious :p (that was me licking my lips...mmmmm...mmmm...MMMMMMM)