By creepermagnet - 06/04/2009 19:39 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
I agree, your life sucks 399 842
You deserved it 46 096

creepermagnet tells us more.

creepermagnet 0

Let me tell you the rest of the story: this actually happened a couple months ago, but I just discovered this site. First off, there was NO second date. My God. Right after he said that, I told him I wanted to go home (he had driven, and I didn't have a car or any way to get home). He then asked if I wanted to go to the woods so he could "do things to me." I told him no, going home would be fine. He took me home and I called him and told him I never wanted to see him again. For half an hour, he tried to convince me to see him again, but I eventually just hung up. For a month or so he called me every day but I didn't answer. Finally, I grew tired of this and I answered the phone. I told him he was really scaring me and he needed to stop trying to contact me. He told me, "I was falling in love with you but they all laughed at me!" (Mind you, I do not know who "they" are. Nor do I wish to know). I told him I was very sorry, but he had to stop calling me or I would contact the police. He then said to me, "Where is the darkness??? Why do you paint me as a demon when I just want to show you the light???" I haven't spoken to him since.

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Comments

darkimmortal777 6

HAA HOLY SHIT THAT MADE MY DAY LMAO

oh wow. that actually made me laugh. xD

lol? wow, that woulda' been awkward. he's just joking?

LOL!!!! ahahahahahhahaha. total creep. what do you even say to that?

wow u r so prettyy haha that's weird but I had to say it

OMFG THIS IS SO FRICKIN HILARIOUS....i just have the most amazing picture in my head..this creeper guy suddenly getting really intense.."soon this will be plump with my seed"

LOL I think this is the most hilarious FML I have EVER read.

goodnesssss 0

this is defiantly my all time favorite FML.

LMAO I'm sorry, sweetie , but cut ALL TIES but thank you for sharing. Best FML since the one where the chick popped the pimple on her boyfriend's neck accidentally while making out! XD

twilax101 0

AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA. that made my day. did he have an accent?

liaaa_fml 0

#41- if he was, he's a genius, and it's still hilarious/ an FML, because someone would have to be pretty annoying for someone to be that creepy. and if he wasn't, it's still hilarious. but tears were streaming down my face. hahahaha, fyl indeed.