Love: Today, I went out to lunch with a couple of work buddies. Trying...

By Slayer - 09/10/2011 23:28 - Canada

Today, I went out to lunch with a couple of work buddies. Trying to be suave, I started hitting on our waitress. Not two seconds after saying, "Hey baby," I felt ice water on my balls. The guy next to me had spilled both our water glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 580

You deserved it 35 727

Back to school
Is that it, have we really enjoyed the holidays? It's time to find the best back-to-school struggles. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Hi-de-hi

By Droolgirl - 26/05/2009 01:25 - United States

Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 256

You deserved it 46 583

Business casual

By Anonymous - 08/04/2013 08:30

Today, I had a lunch meeting with important people from my company. While drinking from my wine glass someone cracked a joke, causing me to snort a fountain of wine all over my lap, splashing the people next to me. The horrified look on my boss's face sitting opposite me said everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 263

You deserved it 5 591

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 190

You deserved it 21 648

Klutz

By Sara - 27/05/2024 09:00 - United Kingdom - Blackpool

Today, I went on a date with someone I really like. Midway through dinner, I felt something stuck in my teeth and, trying to be discreet, attempted to remove it. In the process, I flicked a piece of food across the table and it landed in his drink. He looked at it, then at me, then sighed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 146

Maturity level

By Clairebear - 07/05/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 792

By Samipearl - 12/11/2010 14:06 - United States

Today, while at a restaurant with my boyfriend, a piece of ice got stuck in my throat. I couldn't get his attention until after it melted because he was busy checking in on foursquare. When he finally noticed my freaking out and I told him what had happened, he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 498

You deserved it 6 409

By Anonymous - 26/11/2009 03:28 - United States

Today, I was feeling confident enough to approach a guy by asking the bartender if I could buy him a refill of whatever he was drinking. He was drinking water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 900

You deserved it 5 758

By Anonymous - 06/06/2009 02:22 - United States

Today, I was on a double date at a restaurant with two friends of mine and a guy I really liked. Things started getting really quiet so I decided to start talking to make things a little bit less awkward even though I was eating. I ended up spitting a piece of chicken across the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 245

You deserved it 45 087

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 21/01/2010 05:30 - United States

Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. Then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him, giving me the evil eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 745

You deserved it 2 832

By pootythe5th - 30/08/2009 18:09 - United States

Today, I was at my favorite Mexican restaurant when I realized my really cute waiter, along with his buddies kept looking at me and smiling. Trying to be cool, I took a bite of my burrito, choked, and spilled ground beef down my new shirt and in my bra. They laughed the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 537

You deserved it 38 669

chosha_fml 26

Monday 10 October 2011 3:09

YDI for thinking 'hey baby' is suave.

glutgyoogle 6

Monday 10 October 2011 3:03

Well at least you were nice and CHILL

Comments

Toxic_Ninja 2

Friday 14 October 2011 1:03

Did your balls break the ice?

electrorawr 7

Sunday 16 October 2011 18:17

Ask her to dry them off.

DecemberSkye44 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 2:11

why do guys do that???? most of the time a girl at work is trying to focus on her Job. not some pig who thinks everyone wants him. YDI.

Allyrocks113000 0

Saturday 31 December 2011 22:38

Just keep flirting, if you get her in bed then at least you will be able to stay cool.... Wow, that was a horrible joke

frickme444 5

Friday 20 April 2012 3:57

CRY ABOUT IT

helpfulperson 9

Tuesday 16 April 2013 7:08

"Hey baby" makes it sound like you see her as a piece of ass rather than as a person. YDI

popslop 2

Tuesday 7 May 2013 11:26

Why would you even start with "hey baby"? That would be an immediate hell no

sammyjo06 14

Wednesday 26 February 2014 1:51

That's really unprofessional to do in front of people you work with...Maybe the guy next to you was used to you hitting on girls and purposely spilled the water.