Miscellaneous: Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant, where the chefs cook...

By KatrinaKitten - 16/07/2011 17:24 - United States

Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant, where the chefs cook the food right in front of you. Our chef tossed an egg in the air, but sadly didn't catch it. Don't worry though, my hair got it instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 080

You deserved it 3 553

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Same thing different taste

Food flight

By ashley_skillz06 - 24/01/2010 05:21 - France

Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant. While the chef was throwing food at us, I was getting ready for my turn. He tossed a piece of broccoli at me, I leaned back to catch it, completely falling off my chair. I knocked everything over and had the packed restaurant laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 360

You deserved it 7 403

By Anonymous - 07/02/2010 14:19 - United Arab Emirates

Today, I went out for dinner with some friends to a new restaurant. As I was finishing the soup, I noticed a small curly hair at the bottom of the soup. The chef is bald. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 169

You deserved it 2 551

By notmine - 20/04/2014 02:39 - India - New Delhi

Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food. The manager blamed me, even though I'm bald. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 723

You deserved it 3 546

By Tiana - 09/01/2012 01:51 - United States

Today, I asked a waiter at a restaurant if I could go in the kitchen to compliment the chef. She turned out to be really pretty, so trying to be cool, I leaned back onto what I thought was a table. It turned out to be a stove, and my shirt caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 005

You deserved it 36 908

The cliché is true

By Anonymous - 30/09/2009 21:22 - Canada

Today, I went to a restaurant for lunch. I began to eat when I noticed a blond hair in my food. When that happened, I went up to the counter and began complaining about their hygiene. When the manager insisted no one that works there had long blond hair, I realized that it was my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 573

You deserved it 64 897

I'm new to this, sorry

By Fifi - 01/09/2023 06:00

Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 435

Hair-raising

By what the fuck????? - 17/02/2022 16:01 - United States - Denver

Today, while at a restaurant, I watched in horror as my daughter picked a hair out of her food and continued eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 268

By Laura - 11/03/2011 05:20 - United States

Today, I was waiting for the pan to heat up so I could make myself scrambled eggs. Just then, my mom runs up to me, cracks an egg open on my head, and runs away laughing. I only had one other egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 569

You deserved it 4 607

The Blob

By Anonymous - 16/11/2020 17:02 - Germany

Today, I cracked an egg which turned out to have an extremely thin shell, so at first contact with the bowl, it came apart in my hand and the contents glooped right through my fingers, all the way down the kitchen cabinet, into a half-open drawer, as well as onto the floor and underneath the cabinet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 287

By Anonymous - 02/10/2018 05:00

Today, I found out you really can burn down a kitchen by boiling an egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 474

You deserved it 840

KatrinaKitten 16

Saturday 16 July 2011 23:17

Omg, my FML GOT POSTED! I'd like to thank all the moderators and all the wonderful people in the world!

CommonSenseKarma 17

Sunday 17 July 2011 0:41

I've posted 0 because my life is flawless. FML.

Comments

notsofriendly 17

Sunday 17 July 2011 4:46

lmao! what a great mental picture :D

Gigglebear 9

Sunday 17 July 2011 5:44

That's pretty typical for a Teppanyaki restaurant... and part of the fun. Get over it.

bananatruck 1

Sunday 17 July 2011 6:02

you supposed to catch the egg in your mouth

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

Sunday 17 July 2011 6:27

At least it's good for your hair!! =D

iloveWAR 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 7:23

I am just glad the egg didn't land on the floor. That would be such a mess to clean up.

elboon 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 7:50

Phew, I was worried for a second. /s

FMLxRandom 5

Sunday 17 July 2011 8:05

maybe it might make your hair shinny.

WhatsernameM 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 8:06

mine threw a shrimp and it landed in my eye. js

Lulblast 4

Sunday 17 July 2011 8:41

I bet he did it on purpose. If you haven't noticed Asians don't make mistakes .

ouch1990 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 8:49

Are we talking Kobe or Japanese village

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The Top

Today, I'm in the same city as my boyfriend for the first time in two months. My body apparently did not like the idea of me having sex again, as I promptly got a UTI and then the week-long breakthrough bleeding that antibiotics often cause me. The same thing happened the week before he had to move, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 371

You deserved it 184

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 152

You deserved it 60 774

The Top

Today, I was trying to flirt with someone in a small bar. I thought they'd smiled at me, so I smiled back. Turns out, they were smiling at their phone screen. I just awkwardly sat there, smiling into the void. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196

You deserved it 263

Today, I decided to be adventurous and try a new exotic fruit. I bought a dragon fruit, but no one warned me that it looks better on Instagram than it tastes. Now I have a fridge full of disappointment and a dragon fruit that's more like a dragon letdown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 639

Today, I took sexy pictures for my boyfriend while at my aunt's house. I uploaded the pictures and after successfully posting them in a message, I deleted them. I accidentally deleted the whole photo library. Now she's taking the computer to Apple tomorrow to recover the "lost" photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 441

You deserved it 58 295

Today, I got a letter from Yale law school saying I got a 4 year full scholarship. I called my dad crying and read the whole thing... even the bottom, which said, "April fools! Love mom and dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 292

You deserved it 6 527

Today, my dad got dressed up in formal clothes, and I asked what the occasion was. He said he had a hot date, which would've been fine if he hadn't told me what was "on the menu", namely "wining, dining, sixty-nining". Thanks for that image. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 768

You deserved it 2 192

Today, I yelled at a new employee for violating the company's makeup policy which is minimum coverage. She had red lipstick, very dark drawn eyebrows, and foundation that made her look like a ghost. She took out a makeup wipe and used it then showed me it, only to reveal she doesn't wear any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 924

You deserved it 15 130