Transportation: Today, I went to the mall with a couple of friends. While walking...

By Anonymous - 24/04/2009 04:38 - United States

Today, I went to the mall with a couple of friends. While walking through the parking lot, we saw a very dirty car. You couldn't even see the inside of the car through the windows. I thought it would be funny to trace on the window, "Wash Me." After doing so, the driver got out of the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 837

You deserved it 65 445

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By lanaoftherey - 02/06/2015 21:30 - United States

Today, I went to get my car washed at one of those places where you can watch through the glass. I watched in horror, face pressed against the glass, as my car went through with the window down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 062

You deserved it 15 981

By Anonymous - 03/05/2009 11:06 - United States

Today, I noticed that someone smeared "wash me" into the grime of my car. I decided to take it to get a wash. I pulled up, put my vehicle in neutral, and kicked back as it slowly started to move. You never realize how long it takes a sun roof to close until water is dumping on your head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 788

You deserved it 61 014

By WamBamSam - 21/11/2012 09:54 - United Kingdom - Kidderminster

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 092

You deserved it 2 356

By chicoallen - 31/08/2011 18:45 - United States

Today, after getting off work from a horrible 16 hour shift, I went out to my truck. My windows were completely covered in window chalk, to the point that I couldn't leave. I had to spend the next hour and a half washing it all off while my manager laughed about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 985

You deserved it 2 221

By Anonymous - 18/07/2012 17:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went to the beach with a friend. We'd forgotten to get our towels out of the SUV, so I rushed back to the parking lot. I opened the passenger-side door and climbed in to begin my search. After ten seconds or so, I realized I'd busted into someone else's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 594

You deserved it 6 925

Get off my hood

By Anonymous - 03/01/2016 23:00 - United States - Kennett Square

Today, I was at work, a grocery store, and my manager came up to me while I was on my lunch break. He told me that a customer said someone in the parking lot had been loitering around the cars. I went outside to investigate and saw a drunk man pooping on the front of a car. That car was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 464

You deserved it 1 271

By Anonymous - 24/04/2014 15:35 - United Kingdom - Montrose

Today, I got my car cleaned. As I drove home, the passenger of the van in front of me vomited out the window. The vomit sailed back and splattered all over the front of my car. A waste of £10 and a mental image that will never go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 234

You deserved it 3 417

By Anonymous - 20/12/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 643

You deserved it 39 066

Humblebrag?

By P…… - 31/01/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, I wanted to give my car a quick wash, to get the salt and road grime off. My girlfriend lodged herself up my ass and decided that we should deep-clean all four of our cars, then screamed at me when I didn't show enough enthusiasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 454

By Amanda - 11/08/2009 05:52 - United States

Today, I went to Safeway. Go in, get stuff, come out, and I have almost no room to get into my car because an SUV was parked in a compact spot next to me all crooked. Irritated, I got a pen and paper and wrote 'Nice parking you F*ing idiot' and stuck it on the windshield. Then I notice someone was in the SUV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 178

You deserved it 46 526

01100110 0

Friday 24 April 2009 13:13

YDI, don't touch other people's cars.

KeithHarris 0

Friday 24 April 2009 12:27

You could always tell him the car told you to do it.

Comments

nicelyjohnson 0

Friday 24 April 2009 21:49

#4, he couldn't check for passengers because of the dirty windows. Did you even read the whole thing?

FPsLife 5

Friday 24 April 2009 22:08

Believe it or not, some people have a bit too much to take care of, barely making ends meet to put cleaning their car as the number one priority. I'm sure they'd just love having to drive a car with "Wash Me' and whatever else manages to enter your mind written on it. You people need to grow up.

Allstarr23 1

Monday 6 December 2010 6:36

this happened at a mall. Malls aren't a necessity. And it is aFML. The slob couldn't take 5 minutes to run water over his car. Pull the stock out of your ass and relax a little

koda_fml 0

Friday 24 April 2009 22:34

lol he probably couldn't see you either anyway

Jel 0

Friday 24 April 2009 22:36

You should of wrote, "I wish my wife was this dirty"

nazooer 11

Friday 24 April 2009 22:39

Shut up #29, what are you a woman?

ThatsAli3 0

Friday 24 April 2009 22:43

#49 What are you a moron? I'm a woman and i don't have an issue with other people's dirty cars. Stop generalizing. K thanks. agree with #43

Kitty34_fml 0

Friday 24 April 2009 22:46

Doing that on your own car or your parents/friends car is funny. Doing it on a strangers car is weird.

zombi_fml 0

Friday 24 April 2009 22:47

#14: Yeah, because this humor is so edgy, you'd have to be a real square not to find this funny. Give me a break, writing "Wash Me" on a car was funny back in 3rd grade, but most of us have moved past that level by now. What #9 wrote was much funnier.