Love: Today, I went with my girlfriend to her ex-boyfriend's house...

By Anonymous - 17/08/2009 17:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I went with my girlfriend to her ex-boyfriend's house party. She got incredibly drunk and I spent the whole night looking after her when she was throwing up. In the brief moment before she passed out she said "thanks Matt, you're a great boyfriend." Matt is her ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 468

You deserved it 6 040

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Inconnu - 18/06/2011 05:13 - France

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 584

You deserved it 3 860

By fuuuudge - 19/08/2009 05:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend took me out to meet his friends. It was going really well until I left to use the bathroom and two of the girls with us came in and started talking about how creepy Matt's new girlfriend is and that they're happy he's going to dump her. My boyfriend is Matt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 655

You deserved it 3 734

By Anonymous - 13/11/2009 00:05 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was throwing a birthday party and got very drunk. She needed help getting to the bathroom so I picked her up and walked her to the toilet. Assuming she needed to throw up, she instead takes a huge, monstrous crap right in front of me. I can't look at her the same ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 453

You deserved it 8 860

With friends like these…

By dreadedmafia86 - 12/03/2010 00:22 - United States

Today, I was upset after my boyfriend and I broke up. My best friend heard and told me she would be right over. Three hours of waiting later, she stumbles in wasted. She had been at the bar, with my ex, making sure he was okay. For me, I just got a list of all the drinks she had that night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 078

You deserved it 2 489

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 917

You deserved it 10 325

By Med - 13/11/2012 12:02 - Netherlands - Groningen

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 790

You deserved it 2 974

The ex from hell

By welpwelpwelp - 08/07/2015 17:45 - Australia - Canberra

Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 990

You deserved it 1 958

By allennn - 14/03/2010 14:56 - France

Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 926

You deserved it 38 549

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 787

You deserved it 297

By bubblegum92 - 29/06/2013 08:02 - Australia - Perth

Today, It was my fiancé's 21st birthday party. It ended with him too drunk to walk and wailing about how much he misses an ex girlfriend of his that he dumped 4 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 255

You deserved it 5 019

genius_man16 0

Monday 17 August 2009 23:16

God I hate that excuse. It is NOT a truth serum. It does leave you a little uninhibited and you can sometimes say truthful things, but if you take everything a drunk person says a "the whole truth" or whatever you are clearly a moron. Alcohol in my experience makes people mix things up more than it is a "truth serum." I would guess that she said "Matt" more because it was his party, and less because she still has feelings for him. Is there a possibility she does? Sure, but I wouldn't bet on it. /rant

kayceesaysfyl 0

Monday 17 August 2009 23:03

you shoulda left her then and there

Comments

purplepickle 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 3:58

Some people get drunk, he can accept that if he wants and she was drunk, she probably didn't even know what she was saying. Its sort of like when your parents get their kids names mixed up.

xokayyox115 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 4:54

sounds a little like my weekend except she threw up all over me and my tent. Then the next day blamed the ruined tent on me.

DomyDamsy 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 5:01

thats a fhl(f her life)

triplethreat13 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 5:16

she was terribly drunk, people say things they don't mean when they've had too much to drink. so she got your name mixed up, big deal. she was appreciative of you helping her. get over it.

shamwowman 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 5:51

why would you go to her ex-boyfriends party with her??? that's just a recipe for awkward moments.

ragsy 7

Tuesday 18 August 2009 6:33

Sounds like she was just trying to make her ex jealous by bringing you.

lologirl419 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 6:43

hmm... I see the FYL button, I see the YDI button, but I can't seem to find the SO-*******-WHAT? button. People say the wrong thing when they're drunk. You gotta get over it. All these FML's complaining about things drunk people say, they really piss me off. THEY'RE DRUNK. THEY SAID THE WRONG NAME. BOO HOO. GET A LIFE. *phew* sorry for my tirade.