Intimacy: Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find a very gorgeous...

By feelthelove - 02/11/2009 18:08 - United States

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find a very gorgeous girl in my bed. Her only words to me were "did anything happen?" When I replied yes she began to cry. Nice to know I was someone's rock bottom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 610

You deserved it 5 615

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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By drinkdrankdrunk - 27/09/2013 07:33 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 264

You deserved it 17 921

By ak. - 02/03/2009 21:26 - United States

Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 701

You deserved it 11 368

By Anonymous - 15/05/2013 20:21 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 672

You deserved it 4 572

By Madmanmorton - 16/06/2011 18:34 - United States

Today, after a long night of drinking and partying, I woke up in my bed next to a beast of a woman. At least I know I made it home safely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 147

You deserved it 47 304

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 917

You deserved it 10 325

By depressed - 22/02/2010 07:23 - United States

Today, a girl I have been wanting for years told me she was drunk and needed me to take her home. On the way home she was very frisky and flirty, and I kept telling her to wait till we got to her place. When we finally arrived, she passed out on me and I was stuck there watching her sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 823

You deserved it 26 498

Do I know you?

By goblue - 21/12/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, I was sleeping in my room when I awoke to an unfamiliar female voice in my apartment, followed by a thud. I walked out to find a drunk girl I've never met collapsed in my doorway. After puking all over the place, she had me call her father, who picked her up 10 minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 468

You deserved it 3 174

By Clader - 10/12/2008 03:09 - France

Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 621

You deserved it 2 890

By Matt - 13/07/2012 19:06 - United States

Today, I woke up in a daze after a long night drinking. I felt a subtle nudge on my shoulder. I was at my ex-girlfriend's house, passed out on top of her, with no pants on. Her dad was, in so many words, informing me that I had to leave immediately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 346

You deserved it 57 819

By geniusdrunk - 09/08/2019 02:00

Today, after a month of sobriety, I woke up in my ex-girlfriend's house with absolutely no recollection as to how I got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 414

You deserved it 712

polico_wolf 0

Monday 2 November 2009 23:16

she probably has a boyfriend and is crying that she accidently cheated on him or maybe she's a virgin and she didnt want to lost her viginaty to a complete stranger of maybe she didnt want to have sex with a complete stranger it has nothing to do with you.

LemonadePink 0

Monday 2 November 2009 23:17

Dude, that's just the way most girls are. Guys think it's awesome to hook up with random hot girls. Girls...actually give a **** about sleeping with random guys, well girls that aren't ****** care anyway. She just ****** up, drank too much and had a random hook up. It has nothing to do with YOU, just herself. Get over yourself.

Comments

Brittface 6

Monday 2 November 2009 23:47

Haha #7 Best joke ever! it's also bot rape if you yell HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Anyway, she couldve been crying about something else. Like maybe she has a boyfriend or she just was scared and sad she slept with a random person.

shining_star 0

Tuesday 3 November 2009 0:02

Jesus not everything has to be about you, if i woke up next to a guy after a drunk night i would cry too...God don't be such a d.ick

txgirl09 5

Tuesday 3 November 2009 0:18

Maybe you didn't sleep together. If you had would she not have felt it(being sore, ect) the next morning?

LolitaGirl_fml 0

Tuesday 3 November 2009 0:24

she might have been a virgin, or have a boyfriend/fiance. Maybe that's why she's crying.

kristidgranger 3

Tuesday 3 November 2009 0:35

u have to understand though. if I went out got drunk and wokeup next to a guy I would want to cry too. even if it's my fault bc I would be upset I acted like a ****. it doesn't matter how cute, rich or nice he would be. so font take it ofensively. it just looks bad!

RedBaron 0

Tuesday 3 November 2009 0:54

"You know when girls go, I was so drunk last night I shouldn't have slept ei that guy?" you were that mistake!

ijrnelson 0

Tuesday 3 November 2009 1:06

Christian maybe. **** HER life more than yours tho - your confidence can't b hit too badly by this after all

omghehehe 0

Tuesday 3 November 2009 5:06

hahahhaha good one! :D op: dont know if u realized how drunk she was and what she did to u before sex. u shouldve waited. BUT, the way u worded that 1st sentence, doesnt sound like u remember much too. r u sure anything happened??!