Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd...

By :( - 27/01/2014 22:31 - Algeria

Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 269

You deserved it 62 389

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Same thing different taste

Completely wet

By Anonymous - 27/02/2020 20:00

Today, I was drinking too much and I have to pee constantly, so I went to bed without my girlfriend. Hours later she woke me up wanting sex, but she realized that I pissed the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 2 035

How romantic

By SmokedSalmon - 13/02/2009 00:54 - United States

Today, I woke up next to a slumbering girl I had just met the night before. She had all the covers on top of her and I was cold. Not only was I cold, but the sheets were really cold. So I got up and realized she'd peed a drunken night's worth of beer all over my sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 246

You deserved it 43 582

Hangover time

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 30 377

By Embarassed - 10/09/2009 05:32 - Canada

Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 597

You deserved it 8 129

By Anonymous - 29/01/2019 16:00

Today, I am now sleeping on the floor because my friend got super drunk at a small party then peed herself in her sleep. I was sleeping beside her and my clothes smell like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 157

You deserved it 238

By eggnoodles - 13/12/2009 05:44 - United States

Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 007

You deserved it 53 185

Put the booze down

By Anonymous - 13/08/2020 14:01

Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 2 081

By Anonymous - 28/08/2019 00:01 - Australia - Darwin

Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 1 892

By Anonymousse - 13/11/2015 12:34 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 780

You deserved it 1 559

By Med - 13/11/2012 12:02 - Netherlands - Groningen

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 792

You deserved it 2 974

Welshite 39

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:05

You're a jerk. Next time own up to your own messes.

Carpenter_C 14

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:05

You must've really been pissed.

Comments

mysweetinsanity 3

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:10

Better to be pissed off than pissed on :/

Zelphoric 25

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:42

I'm glad you used "than" instead of "then" I've seen that used in this case before :p

thatnucca 36

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:10

And she's still with you why?! Smfh

TXFernwoods 26

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:10

Hopefully she's not mad at you for being a dumbass

derpina15 26

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:11

Because admitting to what you've done has way more consequences than rolling your girlfriend into a puddle of your piss...

julia2750 11

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:14

"Today, I wet the bed when I was asleep. I woke up to the disgusted face of my boyfriend. FML"

brookenicolee29 27

Tuesday 28 January 2014 2:17

I think the OP is a girl. Her gender sign says so anyways..

Welshite 39

Tuesday 28 January 2014 2:21

#44: Uh...no.

brookenicolee29 27

Tuesday 28 January 2014 2:24

**** nevermind. Wrong symbol.

junkman6 22

Tuesday 28 January 2014 3:40

Really rough week ey 44? :P

brookenicolee29 27

Tuesday 28 January 2014 5:17

You could say that.

weveallbeenthere 30

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:14

a real man wouldn't have done that. Asshole.

xtna 9

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:16

dick

well_hi_there 7

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:18

your an asshole

dachayke 16

Tuesday 28 January 2014 2:21

It's time for another episode of "The Grammar Nazi"! Ahem. *you're. Thank you for watching "The Grammar Nazi"! Stay tuned next time to see the Nazi correct the "then and than error". Now for the weather...

buttcramp 21

Tuesday 28 January 2014 8:18

This was the most clever way to call someone out for their improper grammar! Normally, I sort of groan to myself when the grammar police comment but this made me crack a smile! Thanks for being original and not a total ass lol

Chellybelly92 14

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:20

More like **** her life for being with a man that can't own up to something that small.

BrittNic0le 9

Tuesday 28 January 2014 1:28

Lying about it and blaming your girlfriend makes you a butt munch, where simply peeing the bed makes you human. I wonder how she'll react when she notices that after supposedly having an accident her pants are somehow magically dry.