By clodius - 20/11/2013 18:25 - United Kingdom - Airdrie

Spicy
Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks 65 222
You deserved it 23 287

clodius_fml tells us more.

clodius_fml 6

Hi, OP here. I genuinely didn't think this would be published but here we go. Yes on that night I was extremely drunk and she was drinking heavily too, and I mean heavily. I didn't notice the huge bump because 1) I was shitfaced 2) She hid it extremely well. Anyway after talking to a few people it seems that this woman has been going around for the past 7 months sleeping with people and saying they are the dad. I have nothing wrong with people having sex when they aren't in a relationship but don't try and pin point your baby's dad on some bloke. It is wrong on so many levels.

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Top comments

linyah 11

boy..i feel sorry for the child she has if she got shit faced while with child..

467 3
thrifting 18

If she had been drinking heavily, I feel bad for that baby. Fetal alcohol syndrome is serious, not to mention she's probably been shitfaced every other time she's slept around and tried to pull that trick. :/

399 2

Comments

MJFehr 3

Plot twist; you're actually suffering from amnesia and it is your kid

20 5
Mackay92 14

you're going to be on Jeremy Kyle soon

5 2
Coeliacchic93 21

151 have you seen Jerry Springer the musical?

0 0
StompinOnCrayons 15

And the next time you grab a beer you will have a kid screaming "papi !"

9 1
amisenho 11

I'd take that as an insult. She was really hoping you'd be dumb enough to believe her. Then again, it was drunken sex.

5 0
Ghost308 11

Haha that's a special kind of desperate!!!

10 0
PunkCupcake 12

Why is it that when I read this it reminded me of My Name Is Earl?

7 0
notsofriendly 17

Maybe she's right... you must have been pretty damn drunk to not have noticed her giant belly! xD

4 1
limitedition 25

I'd take this as a sign you need to drink less. That's a special level of hammered to not notice she was heavily pregnant

13 0
nandybear 19

How drunk were you to miss the giant baby bump?

7 0
clh3031 6

My guess would be one of the following, shitfaced, blackout, sloshed, three sheets to the wind.

7 0