Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up naked, duck-taped to the wall, with no memory... - FML

By tapeissticky591 - 14/07/2012 05:49 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, I woke up naked, duck-taped to the wall, with no memory of last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 908

You deserved it 36 513

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 29/12/2009 18:52 - Canada

Today, my mom informed me that she saw me sleepwalking last night. I didn't think much of it, until I remembered that I went to bed without any clothes on last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 571

You deserved it 6 879

By adam - 03/02/2010 20:10 - France

Today, my mom woke me up and asked if I wanted breakfast. I had passed out naked on the kitchen floor after a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 085

You deserved it 40 677

By Anonymous - 28/05/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, I woke up fully clothed, trying to remember the night's events. I walk to the den to awkwardly ask my dad for a ride to my car and he points to the computer. A pic of me passed out on the bathroom floor is now our new wallpaper. My skirt was around my knees. He sent it to everyone we know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 000

You deserved it 25 913

By nekkiddrunk - 14/01/2010 02:04 - United States

Today, I locked myself, drunk and naked, out of my hotel room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 897

You deserved it 40 594

By Anonymous - 28/08/2019 00:01 - Australia - Darwin

Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 1 892

By anthony512 - 24/05/2013 16:08 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, after a sleepless night, I fell asleep at my work desk. When I awoke, I found my co-workers had duct taped me to my chair. I was yelling at them to untape me, when our boss came in, scolded me for fucking about on the job, and left without saying a word to my colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 033

You deserved it 12 765

By CK95 - 01/01/2015 23:02 - United States

Today, I woke up after a night of New Year's Eve partying. I remember the night going great. What I don't remember is laying naked in the shower while my girlfriend ran water over my body to make me feel better. I also made my own funeral plans because I was convinced I was going to die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 840

You deserved it 8 052

By be_so_slick_56 - 16/01/2010 17:51 - United States

Today, I found on the internet pictures of me sleeping. I sleep naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 176

You deserved it 7 834

By Anonymous - 28/02/2015 03:20 - United States - Auburn

Today, I fell in the shower and the doors jammed shut. I was stuck in there for hours, waiting for my parents to come home. They had to open the door for me while I was still naked inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 242

You deserved it 3 477

By mrmr - 07/02/2010 18:32 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower and the glass sliding door was jammed. I tugged it, and it shattered all over me. I was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 538

You deserved it 3 027

Next

Top comments

Climaxx 11

Saturday 14 July 2012 12:01

Oh don't worry, there is bound to be photos to help re-jog your memory!

scoobyfiend 0

Saturday 14 July 2012 12:07

Hey could be worse, it could have been duct tape.

Comments

kainpwnsu 19

Tuesday 17 July 2012 9:21

Wow. Duck taped to the wall, eh? You use duck tape often? You think duck tape is pretty useful? So, duck tape is what ducks use. Or, it could be DUCT TAPE, and that you're an idiot. Can't say im surprised by your story.

someguy314159265 15

Friday 27 July 2012 8:28

Just so you know, there is a brand of duct tape called Duck Tape. Also, refer to one of the comments above yours.

BoomerSpaulding 1

Tuesday 23 October 2012 21:13

When the going gets tough; you just have to hang in there.

SinfulEnd 20

Tuesday 19 March 2013 17:06

Cracks one hell of a drug ain't it?

zomgbies 17

Tuesday 18 June 2013 20:26

Its DUCT tape.

fantasyworld 37

Tuesday 17 June 2014 5:46

Seems like a fun night.

Therid 22

Monday 30 November 2015 16:01

Duck... tape... DUCK tape... Idiot.

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Relatable Mental health Work Awkward AITA Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Annoying Family Intimacy Sex Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Cute Sleep Animals Dogs Shopping My ex Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, I drove past a firehouse that had volunteer firemen taking collections. I take out a $20 and start to roll the window down when I remember my window was broken. I ended up driving by, holding the $20 against the window, staring at the fireman. Now the fireman thinks I was taunting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 842

You deserved it 17 114

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 772

You deserved it 3 931

The Top

Today, I quit my job because my company wouldn't give me the raise I've been asking for for 2 years. I just saw the ad on Craigslist for my replacement position. The starting salary is above what I was asking for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 037

You deserved it 4 916

Today, I left my empty shower running so I could pretend I didn't still live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 697

You deserved it 29 976

Today, I spent five hours sobbing in my room due to antidepressant withdrawal. My mother refused to come and talk to me, because I'm "a terrible, hateful child who only cares about herself." Last week, I spent two hours comforting her because my brother hadn't called in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 208

You deserved it 3 688

Today, I told my family I’m pregnant again. My boyfriend is now sat outside, crying and getting drunk. My oldest son is looking at apartments for rent because he doesn’t want to be around screaming babies again, and my younger two are crying because they don’t want another sibling either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 357

You deserved it 1 726

Today, I was feeling suicidal and needed to talk to someone about it, so I called up the only person in the world who cares about me: my mom. Or so I thought. Her immediate response was, “You should go ahead and end it.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 709

You deserved it 144

Today, I went to run outside, only to smack straight into our sliding glass door. Just a few hours beforehand, my mom put up a strip of colored tape to stop this from happening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 357

You deserved it 31 612