Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat...

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 13:38 - United States - Hudson Falls

Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat and thinking it was absolutely hysterical. This isn't the first time and he just moved in with me for the next six weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 638

You deserved it 2 244

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 15/09/2016 00:35 - United States - Nottingham

Today, while visiting my grandparents, I was afraid that one of their many cats would pee on me. I was peed on all right, by my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 160

You deserved it 808

The future

By omen - 02/09/2020 10:01 - Indonesia - Majalengka

Today, I have to take care of my abusive grandpa. He's smearing poop all over the wall and peeing on the bed again. It's still morning and I'm bracing myself for doing this five times a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 124

By lvegadelgado_6 - 10/08/2015 14:32 - United States - Deerfield

Today, while I was doing my hair, my grandpa walked in, dropped his pants, and started taking a crap in the toilet right next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 556

You deserved it 2 141

Asshole

By Anonymous - 21/06/2013 20:38 - Netherlands - Mierlo

Today, my drunk dad decided to wake me up by lobbing our cat directly into my now-mauled face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 144

You deserved it 3 234

How dare you

By pissed off - 01/07/2012 01:00

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 501

You deserved it 2 628

By jenA - 21/08/2012 13:04 - United States - Russellville

Today, I realized the fastest way to wake up isn't from an alarm clock. It's from the warm, wet sensation of your old and senile cat peeing on you and your bed. I swear he was smiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 861

You deserved it 2 992

By MyS3lf - 19/04/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, I woke up to a strange sound that sounded like a lot of water being poured into a sink. It was actually my father in law using the bathtub as a toilet. He's staying with us, and is showing no signs of leaving any time soon. He thinks this is acceptable behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 127

You deserved it 3 331

Party animal

By Anonymous - 16/09/2020 02:04

Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 281

You deserved it 193

By Username - 02/08/2011 06:46 - United States

Today, I found out that the crazy old man that sleep walks naked around my neighborhood every night is my grandpa. And he's not sleepwalking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 876

You deserved it 2 874

Eye bleach

By Anonymous - 06/05/2009 01:39 - United States

Today, my grandparents are in town for the weekend and are staying in our guest bedroom. This morning I went upstairs to get a drink of water, only to see my 75 year-old grandfather standing stark naked with the fridge door open. He then asked me if we had any coffee creamer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 498

You deserved it 2 904

chick92282 15

Thursday 5 July 2012 18:55

That poor cat! Sounds like it's time to hide the booze.

DogsPaw 16

Thursday 5 July 2012 18:55

Hide the kitty!

Comments

olpally 32

Thursday 5 July 2012 19:53

This just reminds me of Alan from the hangover pissing in mike tyson's pool... hilarious, but like what the ****? Lol

crablegs 2

Thursday 5 July 2012 19:56

that sounds like a good time!

perdix 29

Thursday 5 July 2012 19:57

Back off! It's the last chance the old guy is going to have to aim his penis at pussy. He'll be dead soon enough, probably from a terminal case of Cat Scratch Fever.

noisebox 1

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:26

Funny and you're right

TheMysticSilas 0

Thursday 5 July 2012 22:09

good jokes!:D

KrayKrayGurl117 7

Thursday 5 July 2012 19:57

I bet the cat like attacked his penis...

moikristine 11

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:02

Hide yo booze, hide yo cats

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:08

They peein' on ev'rbody out here.

gantoman 13

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:12

Cause they drinkin' n' pissing on erey cat out here!

iloveweed69 7

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:14

Poor kitty

noisebox 1

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:23

The old bastard is off his rocker....

JaysonYMCMB 1

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:26

how is he able to do dat ive nevr had a great grandparent cuz dey all died nd half of my grandparents dead nd da ones alive can barely move nd dis person is atleast 2 my age prob cuz im 15

everydayFML2121 5

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:35

Yea dood I no wut ur tlkin bout dis fml is cray dood n dis gramps is pissn on catz n stuf

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:47

*bite* *scratch* *maul* This is an official notice that you have been attacked by a rabid chipmunk. For further information, see my profile. GET YOUR ASS BACK TO SUMMER SCHOOL AND LEARN ABOUT GRAMMAR AND SPELLING, FOOL.

TheJester12 15

Thursday 5 July 2012 20:47

your grandfather sounds like loads of fun. take him to him to a retirement home and watch the magic man turn it into a strip club.he will be out of your hands and will die a happy man.