Geek: Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and...

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By dwhite032 - 06/06/2011 07:06 - United States

Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 494

You deserved it 6 850

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Same thing different taste

By fuckMYlife94321 - 26/04/2009 16:21 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 876

You deserved it 13 760

By pillowless - 13/10/2011 14:41 - United States

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. The items stolen were my PS3, cell phone, laptop, tablets, and for some reason my deodorant and pillowcases as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 977

You deserved it 2 413

By wheatsnake - 08/10/2009 13:31 - Australia

Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 182

You deserved it 2 821

Thanks for all your help

By jruth7 - 15/05/2011 04:49 - United States

Today, after being in Europe for a month, I got home to find my door wide open and all my stuff gone. I called my dad who was supposed to be watching my house. He told me I should have had someone check on my place while I was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 031

You deserved it 3 700

Help yourself

By Anonymous - 22/11/2014 21:08 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I woke up, only to find my Xbox missing. Thankfully I have a security camera discreetly wired up in the tree on my lawn. Checking the tapes, I saw my brother park outside my house, let himself in with his spare key, then drive off with my missing equipment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 344

You deserved it 2 979

By BedazzledAlpaca - 08/12/2014 05:03 - United States - Englewood

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to find that I had slept through my house getting robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 863

You deserved it 4 311

By Anonymous - 18/01/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I arrived at my apartment to find the door kicked in. Inside, I found my TV, Xbox, stereo, CDs, and laptop had all been stolen. When my roommate got home, I told him about it, to which he replied, "Yeah, I left my keys inside this morning, so I kicked the door in to get them." He left with the door kicked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 471

You deserved it 2 564

By jccwell - 23/09/2011 16:50 - United States

Today, my dad called, saying he was in town and that he wanted to see me. I was excited, thinking he wanted to come see my new apartment. Turns out he just wanted to borrow my Xbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 096

You deserved it 2 381

By Danielle - 06/06/2011 19:00 - United States

Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 813

You deserved it 4 073

Impatience

By Anonymous - 15/05/2020 02:00

Today, my dad asked me to help him buy a laptop by searching online. He explicitly said, "When you have time." I decided to shower as I had just woken up. While showering, I was startled by loud banging and my dad angrily asking why I wasn't looking for his laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 763

You deserved it 149

Big_Red_138 3

Monday 6 June 2011 15:50

Get him back, steal his Viagra. Watch him freak out because of limp dick...just an idea.

lovinit5683 0

Monday 6 June 2011 15:47

Okay that is funny but wrong. You can always get him back though.

Comments

psycho456 0

Monday 6 June 2011 19:03

go PlayStation!

colgesuks 3

Monday 6 June 2011 19:13

thats legit, cool dad

lborgens 0

Monday 6 June 2011 19:14

I'm a dad. Thanks for the great idea...

djxtones 0

Monday 6 June 2011 19:57

ahahaha I hope he recorded it and put it on YouTube. If he didn't, he missed out on a viral moment and he's selfish for keeping it to himself! :P

GeneralMotors 23

Monday 6 June 2011 20:08

that is awesome! ur dad is sweet

jcingram 2

Monday 6 June 2011 20:48

At least its not actually stolen. Great prank, but fathers day is around the corner so you gotta get him back haha

TheresNoEffingwa 7

Monday 6 June 2011 20:54

best. dad. ever.

bitchslapped22 14

Monday 6 June 2011 20:56

YDI for having PS3

nananabatmannnn 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 12:33

You are ******* stupid and deserve to be devoured by rabid raccoons for saying that.

peasinacan 0

Monday 6 June 2011 21:00

at least it wasnt a real one

crazedguy 0

Monday 6 June 2011 21:31

troll dad strikes again!

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Today, I brought my best friend to my uncle's birthday party. We were having a great time until my grandmother walked up to us and said to me, "You sure have a nice looking boyfriend." My friend is a girl. She has cancer and lost all of her hair due to chemotherapy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 784

You deserved it 2 410

Today, I took my toddler to a petting zoo and warned her not to stick her fingers in the goat pen. Two minutes later, I stuck my finger in to pet one, and it bit me. She looked me dead in the eyes and said, “See? I told you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 61

You deserved it 562

The Top

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 007

You deserved it 3 080

Today, while helping at my grandma's church, the new Orthodox Priest encouraged me to come to confession because he was sure I would have "a lot of stories to tell" and finished by seductively winking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 648

You deserved it 344

Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 183

Today, I found a bell that had been tied into the tassel of my ski hat by my twin sister as part of a longstanding prank war between us. I'm deaf and have apparently been jingling like an elf for over a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 63

Today, I went to the DMV to get my license. I almost ran over my evaluator as he was walking to get in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 012

You deserved it 24 595

Today, I've been getting terrifying threats all day. Why? I broke up with my girlfriend and turned her in to the police after she and her friends shared their plan to firebomb a church during Sunday school. I didn't know I was dating a terrorist. I might need a new identity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 224

You deserved it 115

Same thing different taste

Thanks for all your help

Help yourself

Impatience

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