Geek: Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and...

FML for mobile
Free

By dwhite032 - 06/06/2011 07:06 - United States

Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 494

You deserved it 6 850

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By fuckMYlife94321 - 26/04/2009 16:21 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 876

You deserved it 13 760

By pillowless - 13/10/2011 14:41 - United States

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. The items stolen were my PS3, cell phone, laptop, tablets, and for some reason my deodorant and pillowcases as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 977

You deserved it 2 413

By wheatsnake - 08/10/2009 13:31 - Australia

Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 182

You deserved it 2 821

Thanks for all your help

By jruth7 - 15/05/2011 04:49 - United States

Today, after being in Europe for a month, I got home to find my door wide open and all my stuff gone. I called my dad who was supposed to be watching my house. He told me I should have had someone check on my place while I was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 031

You deserved it 3 700

Help yourself

By Anonymous - 22/11/2014 21:08 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I woke up, only to find my Xbox missing. Thankfully I have a security camera discreetly wired up in the tree on my lawn. Checking the tapes, I saw my brother park outside my house, let himself in with his spare key, then drive off with my missing equipment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 344

You deserved it 2 979

By BedazzledAlpaca - 08/12/2014 05:03 - United States - Englewood

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to find that I had slept through my house getting robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 863

You deserved it 4 311

By Anonymous - 18/01/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I arrived at my apartment to find the door kicked in. Inside, I found my TV, Xbox, stereo, CDs, and laptop had all been stolen. When my roommate got home, I told him about it, to which he replied, "Yeah, I left my keys inside this morning, so I kicked the door in to get them." He left with the door kicked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 471

You deserved it 2 564

By jccwell - 23/09/2011 16:50 - United States

Today, my dad called, saying he was in town and that he wanted to see me. I was excited, thinking he wanted to come see my new apartment. Turns out he just wanted to borrow my Xbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 096

You deserved it 2 381

By Danielle - 06/06/2011 19:00 - United States

Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 813

You deserved it 4 073

Impatience

By Anonymous - 15/05/2020 02:00

Today, my dad asked me to help him buy a laptop by searching online. He explicitly said, "When you have time." I decided to shower as I had just woken up. While showering, I was startled by loud banging and my dad angrily asking why I wasn't looking for his laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 763

You deserved it 149

Big_Red_138 3

Monday 6 June 2011 15:50

Get him back, steal his Viagra. Watch him freak out because of limp dick...just an idea.

lovinit5683 0

Monday 6 June 2011 15:47

Okay that is funny but wrong. You can always get him back though.

Comments

gsxxerr 4

Monday 6 June 2011 21:35

holy shit

xXCODGODXx 11

Monday 6 June 2011 21:45

haha ur a gullible human being

omg_a_BALLOON 0

Monday 6 June 2011 21:57

YDI for having a PS3

JokerJohn7 0

Monday 6 June 2011 22:29

awesome dad .

fatalblue06 0

Monday 6 June 2011 23:11

get him back one day!

kaldnsngdjs 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 0:19

thats hilarious

runepop 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 2:46

LOL

frescheina 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 4:07

HA!! your dad sounds cool as ****

funnyfmfl 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 4:36

omfg that wood suck

nananabatmannnn 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 8:48

I am significantly stupider for have reading that comment. **would

Dodgerfan_3 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 5:34

that's not funny........THAT'S HILARIOUS.

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Embarrassing Relatable Work Health Sports Scary Dentist Management Kids Parents Awkward Covid Exams Cops Cheating Love Break-ups Grandparents Cute Miscellaneous Neighbours Annoying Birthday Weird Intimacy Sex Movies Injury Friends Food

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 2 182

Today, my dad learned that it's possible to power a lightbulb with a potato. Since then, he's been going around the house removing all the plugs from the wall and plugging them into potatoes instead. He's absolutely baffled as to why it won't work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 588

You deserved it 2 738

The Top

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 743

You deserved it 8 144

Today, my girlfriend cornered me and asked if I'm gay. I said no and asked why she even had any doubts. Apparently me being depressed and crying over my grandmother's death is "faggish" and means I want to have sex with men. Who knew? FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 664

You deserved it 1 930

Today, I told my boyfriend the dentist said my blood pressure was high. He was more interested in the fact that the dentist took my blood pressure than my blood pressure being high. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 528

You deserved it 10 729

Today, I was walking to my professor's office. I've had an upset stomach all week, and I still felt a little gassy, so I politely decided to pass gass before entering the room. More than just gas came out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 645

You deserved it 7 521

Today, I'm so broke that I got buyer's remorse after buying a $2 bottle of pancake syrup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 682

You deserved it 2 739

Today, I slipped into an ATM vestibule quickly without a mask. The place smelled like the antiseptic at a doctor's office, so I figured, "What could go wrong?" Not more than 6 hours later, I found out that I’m sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 1 919

Same thing different taste

Thanks for all your help

Help yourself

Impatience

Top comments

Comments