Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up to my roommate's friend rustling in the attic...

By Anonymous - 11/01/2016 21:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up to my roommate's friend rustling in the attic without permission to be there. When I asked how he got in with all doors and windows locked, he simply said, "It's a secret." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 038

You deserved it 1 407

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Roommates from hell

By why me? - 11/03/2014 07:21 - United States - Huntington Park

Today, I came home from a long day from work, only to find a strange woman in my apartment. She explained that my roommate told her it was OK to spend a few days here. I guess he forgot that the room was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 738

You deserved it 3 368

Hush hush

By Louis - 02/09/2024 09:00 - Australia

Today, I went to sneakily grab a snack without waking up my roommate. I was being extra quiet, tiptoeing like a ninja. I opened the fridge door slowly, but managed to knock over a stack of Tupperware boxes. The crash was so loud it could’ve woken the dead. My roommate appeared in the doorway, not amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 224

By sociallyanxiousroomie - 19/04/2016 10:22 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my roommates had a party while I stayed in my room, and that was fine by me. What was not fine was when a stranger broke into my room, asked to lay next to me, and then just went ahead and did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 554

You deserved it 1 630

By leez - 01/02/2009 10:43 - United States

Today, my roommate has gone home for the weekend. She forgot to turn her alarm clock off. Her door is locked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 076

You deserved it 1 840

By breeeeeh - 21/06/2013 22:18 - France - Brou-sur-chantereine

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 681

You deserved it 69 958

Non confrontational

By Anonymous - 04/05/2023 03:00

Today, I snuck into my aunt's house while she was working to raid her pantry, like I do most days. Excited for a snack cake, I went to the pantry. Apparently she'd found out, because there was a lock on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 2 021

By Anonymous - 01/08/2019 06:00

Today, my boyfriend sneaked into my room, not knowing I wasn't home. It would have been great, except my dad went in my room to put laundry away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 253

You deserved it 433

By Devon - 03/09/2010 04:35 - United States

Today, I found out that there is literally a giant hole in my son's bedroom because my son wanted to build a "secret entrance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 070

You deserved it 5 043

By e - 02/12/2010 09:24 - United States

Today, I couldn't find my key so I sat against the wall to wait for my roommate to get home. I fell asleep. When I woke up a few hours later, I could hear her inside. She chose not to wake me up and let me in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 455

You deserved it 4 336

By Anonymous - 21/06/2013 14:28 - United States

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 257

You deserved it 11 322

kimsimwolf 8

Tuesday 12 January 2016 8:55

A secret he can explain to the police after you call them.

slingerslasher 24

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:00

Good thing he didn't pull the secret string, revealing the secret compartment of my secret box!

Comments

kimsimwolf 8

Tuesday 12 January 2016 8:55

A secret he can explain to the police after you call them.

CaptMacLeod 45

Tuesday 12 January 2016 8:59

"Why are the police here?" "It's a secret, too."

friedpwnadge 25

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:57

Time to change the locks.

SixthSinEnvy 39

Tuesday 12 January 2016 22:33

Change the locks? Time to change addresses.

Noelletakumi 36

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:00

That's terrifying, I would call the police. Unless he just spent the night with your roommate and is messing with you. But, still not cool.

slingerslasher 24

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:00

Good thing he didn't pull the secret string, revealing the secret compartment of my secret box!

rjc490 29

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:44

Mischief managed....

slingerslasher 24

Tuesday 12 January 2016 11:19

AN EMBARRASSING SNAPSHOT OF SPONGEBOB AT THE CHRISTMAS PARTY

Myo_fml 20

Tuesday 12 January 2016 12:51

I really love the internet. if you Google it, so many artists have depicted what they think that photo looks like. Search it, search it now.

Feklfekl2222 32

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:01

Well at least he's your roommates friend not a stranger, so they're more likely to investigate him during the murder investigation

MrSarary 26

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:08

Maybe you're roommate let them in? I mean they are friends. On the other hand maybe there really is a secret passage way into you attic?

badassmf1234 22

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:20

That's not creepy at all

LPac5295 27

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:33

This will be a fun story for the police!

ronnixoxo 18

Tuesday 12 January 2016 9:50

damn tweakers.

8Dirty1 24

Tuesday 12 January 2016 10:45

would you prefer your attic was haunted instead?

laden_swallow09 34

Tuesday 12 January 2016 14:51

Yes. Because ghosts can't kill me in my sleep even if they wanted. Just like mediums and exorcists, I can call up the police to remove a troublesome trespasser, if not more easily.