Work: Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing...

By Anonymous - 17/03/2016 15:34 - United States - Pomona

Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 203

You deserved it 2 575

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 21:15 - Sweden - Uppsala

Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook my client's emotional outbursts in the courtroom, promising that he'd be on his best behavior from now on. An hour later, he screamed "FUCK YOU!" at the judge for telling him to quiet down. I hate my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 533

You deserved it 4 239

Contempt

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 21:59 - United States - Richmond

Today, as a public defender, my client was actually innocent for once. I intended to utterly destroy the prosecution's case and demonstrate his good character. That plan went straight to hell when he showed up heavily intoxicated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 426

You deserved it 1 585

By A Henderson - 25/04/2012 20:50 - United States

Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 192

You deserved it 2 254

By harrington61 - 19/05/2013 21:27 - United States - Midland

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 305

You deserved it 3 920

By zl5 - 04/07/2014 23:17 - New Zealand - Masterton

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 124

You deserved it 4 843

Crimefighters

By Anonymous - 03/07/2009 19:56 - Canada

Today, I was at the park with a friend when I said, "Gotta go, sorry. I've got court in an hour." The lady on the bench next to us then loudly complained how disgusting I was for being a criminal and threw her bird seed at me, dirtying my suit. I'm a lawyer with a case in an hour, not a criminal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 400

You deserved it 3 875

By Anonymous - 23/05/2013 01:57 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 367

You deserved it 4 762

By mustanggt - 10/07/2012 15:39 - United States - La Porte

Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 853

You deserved it 31 224

Cars can **** right off

By Anonymous - 31/07/2022 18:00

Today, I hate the legal profession with a passion, as I just walked out of court where a lawyer, spouting incomprehensible bollocks in Latin, convinced a judge to let a developer bulldoze a children's playground and part of a forest, to build a second multi-storey car park for the shopping centre across the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 982

You deserved it 168

By apav - 11/06/2009 11:52 - Australia

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 904

You deserved it 24 410

jamesderp 15

Friday 18 March 2016 0:10

It's never too late to switch careers...

totallynotemily 25

Friday 18 March 2016 0:13

He needs to learn when to use his "freedom of speech"

Comments

igg125 30

Friday 18 March 2016 0:35

Look at the bright side you're an attorney and make lots of money.

Shade1982 20

Friday 18 March 2016 11:25

Public defenders usually don't really make all that much money...

catherinecas 30

Friday 18 March 2016 20:19

Yeah the median income for attorneys in the US is right above poverty level. It's also a skewed result because of the dudes who make 6 figures practicing law.

goodread2200 10

Friday 18 March 2016 0:40

Even nut jobs need help. In fact it's the nut jobs that need the most help. Keep up the good work but if your heart really isn't in it maybe try something else.

Ms_ValS 27

Friday 18 March 2016 5:15

Not exactly. Sure there are those who are facing a legtimate psychological issue. Then there are people who are just self-entitled assholes. OP'S client sounds like the latter.

Shay_Shay97 23

Friday 18 March 2016 0:47

Well, looks like you'd better call Saul Goodman in on this one. I heard he's really good at defending shitty clients.

Redmond64 16

Friday 18 March 2016 1:22

Switch sides and prosecute him?

Laphog 17

Friday 18 March 2016 1:25

If you think that's bad, try defending clients who have been charged with having sex with a severed head .

catherinecas 30

Friday 18 March 2016 2:38

Is this a reference to something? Because it's incredibly specific.

Laphog 17

Friday 18 March 2016 2:47

Better call Saul

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Friday 18 March 2016 1:50

I don't see what the problem is. Your job as a public defender is to give your client the best defence you can. It's not to get them out of going to jail regardless of whether or not they were guilty. This guy sounds like he deserved jail time and got it. So yay! The system worked. Sure it's annoying to lose but as a public defender your job is to be there for the innocents who caught up in the system. Just do your best and if your client decides to undermine you, well perhaps you weren't meant to get them out of jail time anyway.

Shade1982 20

Friday 18 March 2016 11:24

Actually, the original purpose of lawyers (both public defenders and private law firms) was to protect the rights of the defendant, not to actually get their client out of jail...