Miscellaneous: Today, my balls were stepped on while I was taking a nap in the...

By dak-rod423 - 15/10/2011 04:33 - United States

Today, my balls were stepped on while I was taking a nap in the park. The man said he didn't see me lying there. I was wearing a neon orange jacket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 655

You deserved it 11 707

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Same thing different taste

By whoslade - 28/06/2012 17:36 - United States

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 921

You deserved it 4 590

Nature finds a way

By Anonymous - 13/04/2023 18:00 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, I decided to take a nap in the park. I found a nice shady spot and closed my eyes. When I woke up, I realized I had fallen asleep on an ant hill. My entire body was riddled with ants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 457

By Lizofsmeg - 26/10/2009 16:24 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking in the park when I was hit on the shin by a red ball. I was confused, until it was followed by an enormous German Shepherd dog going at top speed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 365

You deserved it 2 658

By bbbkingsey - 23/07/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 884

You deserved it 4 373

By Anonymous - 08/01/2011 07:56 - United States

Today, on the way to work, I was punched in the balls by a complete stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 085

You deserved it 4 265

By Bigfoot - 02/09/2017 01:30

Today, I participated in an obstacle course. As I was going over a set of monkey bars, my balls got crushed between the bar and my gut. I barely managed to get down before blacking out in the middle of the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 983

You deserved it 401

By wtf - 17/12/2012 19:38 - United States

Today, I was hit in the head by a golf ball. I wasn't near a golf course, and nobody was anywhere in sight. I'm still trying to figure out what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 835

You deserved it 3 878

By DarkDolly - 04/02/2012 16:39 - France

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 038

You deserved it 3 173

By Jac - 17/01/2010 19:59 - United States

Today, my friend decided to pants me in the middle of the mall. I wasn't wearing underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 783

You deserved it 32 833

ARE YOU ******* SORRY?

By Evelyn - 19/03/2012 20:18 - United States

Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 508

You deserved it 7 898

Mr_Alarm 12

Saturday 15 October 2011 12:17

Why were your balls taking a nap in the park?

Im2Handsom 1

Saturday 15 October 2011 12:20

Lucky that woke you up, instead of a man throwing you in his van.

Comments

hateevryone 14

Saturday 15 October 2011 16:38

You should have took a nap at home.

TheSmoothDude 10

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:02

Maybe he stepped on your balls because of the neon orange jacket...

The_Troller 14

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:04

Maybe OP fell asleep while planking

Danielique 15

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:08

YDI for wearing a neon orange jacket.

SilverBelle13 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:24

I feel sorry for you and all, but I have to ask why you were sleeping in a park?

Darklord53 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:25

He stepped on your balls because you're a douche that wears outdated clothing, not because he couldn't see you

Remzy27 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:29

Maybe he is color blind

modernbenoni 8

Saturday 15 October 2011 18:14

You are an idiot, you clearly don't understand how that works at all.

Poetaster 10

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:42

Personally, I never sleep face-up, spread eagle at The Helen Keller Park.

IchigoKoneko 6

Saturday 15 October 2011 17:52

Well you shouldn't go to sleep in a public park were douchebags can step on you :L

Jewdazking23 5

Saturday 15 October 2011 18:23

That was uncalled for but wat do u expect when u rock out with ur **** out. enough said

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The Top

Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204

You deserved it 474

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 41 023

The Top

Today, my thoughts that I'm going crazy were confirmed when I got into the shower with my socks on. The worst part is that I didn't realize it for a good five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 306

You deserved it 5 483

Today, unlike what you may have joked about with your friends, I actually did meet people who told me to "take a hit or we'll beat the shit out of you." I got picked up by my mom 20 minutes later like planned. When my mom noticed I was high, she grounded me for the "rest of high school." FML

I agree, your life sucks 159

You deserved it 403

Today, because I was the only manager scheduled, I went into work despite feeling sick to my stomach. While sitting down with a customer, I got the urge to throw up and tried to hold it back. Instead I vomited in my mouth, instinctively swallowed and started choking in front of the customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 796

You deserved it 3 392

Today, ten minutes into a blind date, my date said, "I don't mean to be rude, but... your face? It's the reason booze was invented." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 808

You deserved it 4 823

Today, I was in the kitchen with my mother putting up the dishes. I went to stand up from putting a pot in a lower cabinet and hit my head on the upper cabinet she left open by accident. Hello concussion number nine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 756

You deserved it 961

Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 864

You deserved it 7 313

Same thing different taste

Nature finds a way

ARE YOU ******* SORRY?

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