Intimacy: Today, my best friend and I, after years of sexual tension, began...

By anonymous - 24/10/2014 01:25 - United States - West Babylon

Today, my best friend and I, after years of sexual tension, began to have sex for the first time. Things got heated and he decided to abruptly stand up with me around him. I got so nervous, spazzed out, and now have 37 staples in my head courtesy of his bookshelf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 389

You deserved it 7 204

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Same thing different taste

Sexy!

By troubleintoyland - 24/12/2010 03:03 - United States

Today, my fiancé and I attempted to have sex in my childhood bedroom. As we were falling onto the bed, I smacked my head on the wall, which caused a shelf of stuffed toys to fall onto the bed. Not only did it kill the mood, the shelf also hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 862

You deserved it 9 569

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 163

You deserved it 4 026

Anemic performance

By too dumb for sex - 16/03/2019 22:00

Today, we tried to have sex for the first time but I got so excited my blood pressure shot up and I got a nosebleed that didn't fully stop for nearly 30 minutes. Then when we tried again she accidentally headbutted me. The new bleeding still hasn't stopped and I'm feeling very lightheaded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 272

You deserved it 258

Oh yessss

By Anonymous - 29/07/2011 07:24 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 786

You deserved it 10 731

By Misc. - 13/03/2009 17:54 - United States

Today, me and my boyfriend were just about to have sex and I was so excited to do it just like the movies. He carried me up and just as he was about to lay me on the bed he sneezed, dropping me at the same time. I hit my head. Now I have 12 stitches where my eyebrow used to be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 058

You deserved it 8 207

By JoshuasGirl - 23/12/2013 19:13 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 098

You deserved it 6 453

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 22:00 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 960

You deserved it 6 539

Passionate

By Anonymous - 09/10/2020 02:00

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate in an alley. He pushed me up against a wall and started kissing me, but he pushed me so hard I cut open my head and needed 10 stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 137

You deserved it 477

Heartless swine

By Anonymous - 15/09/2015 05:56 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 023

You deserved it 4 391

By Darcy - 26/10/2011 06:58 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 570

You deserved it 4 582

LostMy_Marbles 24

Friday 24 October 2014 9:24

Rough sex, you're doing it wrong. Seriously though, hope you're ok!

junkman6 22

Friday 24 October 2014 9:27

37 staples!? Jesus! I went through a windshield and didn't even need 37 staples! Well at least that sex war wound is cooler than run of the mill rug burn.

Comments

ghetto_child 19

Friday 24 October 2014 9:56

Need to learn to relax because I heard that spazzing out can cause splitting headaches!

lexiieeex3 32

Friday 24 October 2014 9:56

Was the sex that good?

Aquila_Umbrae 26

Friday 24 October 2014 10:01

You guys must really like each other.

LennyComa 39

Friday 24 October 2014 10:43

What a nice story to tell the family

DreadedSamurai 17

Friday 24 October 2014 10:43

Well at least you got the tension out... XD

SweetasCandy0609 28

Friday 24 October 2014 10:44

Wow OP that's a lot of staples you must of banged your head pretty hard, I will pray for fast recovery for you, maybe when heal you guys can try again and maybe he will be more careful.