Love: Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss,...

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 912

You deserved it 38 049

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Same thing different taste

Halitosis

By Anonymous - 13/10/2021 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 288

By disgustedgf - 28/06/2011 07:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he stopped brushing his teeth two days after we started dating. Tomorrow is our 2 year anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 937

You deserved it 8 752

By TwiceDaily,Kids - 06/04/2012 00:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 931

You deserved it 5 124

Clean

By gag! - 10/12/2022 00:00

Today, my boyfriend complained that I "treat him like a child" by asking him if he’s brushed his teeth before we kiss. Gee maybe if he brushed regularly like a fucking adult, I wouldn’t HAVE to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 216

By Amelia - 23/06/2019 00:16

Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 236

By nicole - 22/09/2011 10:31 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 399

You deserved it 5 428

Fresh mints

By Julian - 22/12/2008 07:45 - France

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 200

You deserved it 44 960

Seduction technique

By BlueBirdWings - 06/03/2012 07:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 789

You deserved it 6 804

And they say romance is dead…

By BaconBreathBlonde - 30/10/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 043

You deserved it 7 731

By PookaKay02 - 20/09/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 036

You deserved it 8 630

Mischief109 11

Monday 18 June 2012 18:59

What I'm wondering is why did you make out without brushing your teeth first?!

EvilTwerp 12

Monday 18 June 2012 18:59

Maybe you should brush your teeth. Not everyone likes to be disgusting.

Comments

beastmode661 4

Monday 18 June 2012 21:31

He was making out with your teeth?

martinv19 6

Monday 18 June 2012 22:08

Sounds to me like he was already brushing ur teeth!

bdathorne 6

Monday 18 June 2012 22:16

Take a hint OP

Mauskau 35

Monday 18 June 2012 22:35

Op could just have a crappy toothbrush? :p

KiddNYC1O 20

Monday 18 June 2012 23:18

With the right technique it can be done well.

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Monday 18 June 2012 22:53

No comment? Then why'd you comment?

lucianaamelia 21

Monday 18 June 2012 23:14

That's just lazy

evie779 5

Monday 18 June 2012 23:17

I would be so embarrass if I didnt brush my teeth and if I was the guy I would be disguested and never kiss again

Ima_NeRD6213 4

Monday 18 June 2012 23:32

"How's it taste muthafucka!?" -Samuel Jackson

jmedalene 2

Monday 18 June 2012 23:38

Why weren't your teeth brushed

powershock 4

Monday 18 June 2012 23:50

Awe, that's so considerate. I wan't my boyfriend to be my toothbrush, too :(

LizzJizz 16

Sunday 24 June 2012 19:23

Hhhah ha roflmao

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The Top

Today, my parents told me that unless I think about my behaviour and make some real changes, people are going to think I’m weird or suspicious, and I’ll never make friends. This is because I choose to attend church on Sundays instead of watching TV and getting drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 274

Today, my old boss is such an arsehole that not only did he fire me last week, he completely forgot about firing me and when he saw me in the shop as a customer, he yelled at me for being late and out of uniform. I swear his mother didn’t birth him, she shat him out the other hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 82

The Top

Today, while wedding planning, my future MIL complained that the archway was too small for three people. Seeing my confused look, she explained, “Didn’t he tell you? I’m going to be at the altar with you two during the entire ceremony!” He even bought her a ring so she doesn’t feel “left out”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 698

You deserved it 172

Today, while celebrating my 10 years home from Iraq, my brother told us about his new affiliation with Scientology. Apparently, all those roadside bombs I keep dreaming about are just alien ghosts that need to be purged. What's worse is how well it fuses with his new brand of politics: YouTube QAnon channels! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 141

Today, I reassured everyone at work that the mark on my lip was just a pimple, not a cold sore. It's actually neither. I, a 21-year-old young woman, slipped while shaving my moustache and sliced off part of my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 910

You deserved it 636

Today, I was eating a hot fudge sundae and said that the fudge was at the very bottom and I couldn't reach it with my spoon. My husband muttered, "Fat girl problems." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 075

You deserved it 13 171

Today, we finally got paperwork saying we were approved for a loan to buy a house! The only problem? It's not eligible for the county we live in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 079

You deserved it 937

Today, after finding out that I'd slept with our married neighbor, I found out my husband had slept with him too as revenge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 1 018