Love: Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss,...

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 912

You deserved it 38 049

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Same thing different taste

Halitosis

By Anonymous - 13/10/2021 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 288

By disgustedgf - 28/06/2011 07:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he stopped brushing his teeth two days after we started dating. Tomorrow is our 2 year anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 937

You deserved it 8 752

By TwiceDaily,Kids - 06/04/2012 00:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 931

You deserved it 5 124

Clean

By gag! - 10/12/2022 00:00

Today, my boyfriend complained that I "treat him like a child" by asking him if he’s brushed his teeth before we kiss. Gee maybe if he brushed regularly like a fucking adult, I wouldn’t HAVE to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 216

By Amelia - 23/06/2019 00:16

Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 236

By nicole - 22/09/2011 10:31 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 399

You deserved it 5 428

Fresh mints

By Julian - 22/12/2008 07:45 - France

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 200

You deserved it 44 960

Seduction technique

By BlueBirdWings - 06/03/2012 07:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 789

You deserved it 6 804

And they say romance is dead…

By BaconBreathBlonde - 30/10/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 043

You deserved it 7 731

By PookaKay02 - 20/09/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 036

You deserved it 8 630

Mischief109 11

Monday 18 June 2012 18:59

What I'm wondering is why did you make out without brushing your teeth first?!

EvilTwerp 12

Monday 18 June 2012 18:59

Maybe you should brush your teeth. Not everyone likes to be disgusting.

Comments

Californian_Boy 6

Monday 18 June 2012 19:45

Something I would say ad well. I've said it before to an EX

MissMae93 23

Monday 18 June 2012 19:47

If he can FEEL that you need to brush, imagine how bad your breath must smell and how gross you must taste. Seriously, twice a day isn't that hard.

BunBunBabe 8

Monday 18 June 2012 19:52

Gross, if he really thought that why would he run his tongue against them all like he wanted to lick them clean

thatonename 7

Monday 18 June 2012 20:20

Because he wanted to lick them clean, obviously.

Hiimhaileypotter 52

Monday 18 June 2012 19:53

Ew :/ I'm sorry but YDI! No one likes kissing someone who hasn't brushed their teeth unless they're disgusting as well!

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Monday 18 June 2012 19:56

He kind of just ate whatever was between your teeth...

ghnatliker 0

Monday 18 June 2012 19:59

Grosss, lol

Pandacupcakelove 26

Monday 18 June 2012 20:01

O.e Brush your teeth, hun....

mckaylanicole59 4

Monday 18 June 2012 20:03

ha. probably wasnt in the modd for hat ever youve eaten.

MissMae93 23

Monday 18 June 2012 20:38

Uh... What did you just say?

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Monday 18 June 2012 22:50

I think they said he probably wasn't in the mood for whatever you have eaten.

retyi43 14

Monday 18 June 2012 20:06

this FML made me go brush my teeth.

yumcupcakes 2

Monday 18 June 2012 20:17

I don't know what's more disgusting.. You not brushing your teeth or the fact that he LICKED your teeth.

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I agree, your life sucks 560

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Today, I took a very expensive flight to New York City for a job interview. I waited in my hotel room all day for the phone call to go to my once in a lifetime interview. By noon, I was nervous; eight, I was pissed. Around ten, I realized my phone was still in airplane mode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 555

You deserved it 23 502

The Top

Today, I tried to impress a group of friends by jumping a set of stairs on my skateboard. I didn't realize the ceiling dropped down towards the bottom of the stairs and knocked myself out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 678

You deserved it 8 820

Today, I got locked out of my house while wearing pyjamas. I didn’t have my phone, so I had to ask my neighbour to call a locksmith. She insisted on chatting at me for an hour about her love life, while I sat there waiting desperately for the locksmith in my dinosaur-print pyjamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 345

You deserved it 177

Today, I almost got hit by a car because the kid in the back who was wearing headphones was paying more attention to the road than the driver. He only just stopped her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 472

You deserved it 785

Today, my workplace's new policy requires me to ask employees why they're calling out sick. I had to listen to the answer, "When it comes out of your bum, like a bullet from a gun…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 721

You deserved it 140

Today, the bus came to pick up my daughter to take her to kindergarten. When it honked, I opened the door for her to let her run out to it. Halfway there, she tripped and started crying. I couldn't run out because I was still in my underwear. Now her bus thinks I'm the worst mom ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 172

You deserved it 43 781

Today, I was chatting with a coworker when he said he was a "Sigma male." I laughed, thinking he was joking. He then got mad when I explained how the whole alpha/beta thing was actually debunked by its own creator. Sigma balls, dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 155