Love: Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss,... - FML

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 912

You deserved it 38 049

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Halitosis

By Anonymous - 13/10/2021 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 288

By disgustedgf - 28/06/2011 07:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he stopped brushing his teeth two days after we started dating. Tomorrow is our 2 year anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 937

You deserved it 8 752

By TwiceDaily,Kids - 06/04/2012 00:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 931

You deserved it 5 124

Clean

By gag! - 10/12/2022 00:00

Today, my boyfriend complained that I "treat him like a child" by asking him if he’s brushed his teeth before we kiss. Gee maybe if he brushed regularly like a fucking adult, I wouldn’t HAVE to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 216

By Amelia - 23/06/2019 00:16

Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 236

By nicole - 22/09/2011 10:31 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 399

You deserved it 5 428

Fresh mints

By Julian - 22/12/2008 07:45 - France

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 200

You deserved it 44 960

Seduction technique

By BlueBirdWings - 06/03/2012 07:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 789

You deserved it 6 804

And they say romance is dead…

By BaconBreathBlonde - 30/10/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 043

You deserved it 7 731

By PookaKay02 - 20/09/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 036

You deserved it 8 630

Next

Top comments

Mischief109 11

Monday 18 June 2012 18:59

What I'm wondering is why did you make out without brushing your teeth first?!

EvilTwerp 12

Monday 18 June 2012 18:59

Maybe you should brush your teeth. Not everyone likes to be disgusting.

Comments

little_one 20

Monday 18 June 2012 19:18

You don't have a toothbrush in your hand every second of the day usually make out sessions are spontaneous. Carry gum or mints to avoid that awkward situation again.

jjames7543 13

Monday 18 June 2012 19:23

I love how everyone is paying attention to OP not brushing her teeth, but no one is pointing out the major problem: what possessed him to drag his tongue over all her teeth? Edit: even for a French kiss, that's still gross

DiruKitty18 8

Monday 18 June 2012 19:52

I was thinking the same thing, I don't know about anyone else but when im French Kissing someone I try to stay away from their teeth xD

hatesfate 6

Monday 18 June 2012 20:32

^snookie is that you?

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Monday 18 June 2012 22:48

She...looks NOTHING like Snooki.

False_Stupidity 41

Tuesday 19 June 2012 2:41

Well I happen to like exploring my fiancées mouth when kissing, cheeks, tongue and yes her teeth too.

DiruKitty18 8

Tuesday 19 June 2012 14:35

Im glad I have someone to back me up because im pretty sure I look nothing like SnookiXD

forevermaddie 0

Monday 18 June 2012 19:26

WTF if I was you I'll probably be embarrassed. XD

forevermaddie 0

Tuesday 19 June 2012 3:27

Ha yeah. But still that is just disgusting

ZBonner 3

Monday 18 June 2012 19:27

Brush then. (;

Bonzer 2

Tuesday 19 June 2012 1:57

*Than

jjames7543 13

Tuesday 19 June 2012 6:41

@132: no, once again, it's then...

jjames7543 13

Tuesday 19 June 2012 8:31

@159: No, you don't judge when to use them by how the sentence sounds (although when you know the difference very well, one will sound very wrong when used incorrectly) Than is a comparative word, then is used for expressing time or a sequence

Leslier_fml 4

Monday 18 June 2012 19:32

Yeah, thats a turn off, brush them.

Kbearlove23 0

Monday 18 June 2012 19:37

Scope and those mini tooth brushes to go(:

lilysmiles143 0

Monday 18 June 2012 19:40

ewww maybe you really should so you wont be even more emabarrassed

lilysmiles143 0

Monday 18 June 2012 19:43

why halfway through the kiss though?

NIRVANA1990s 1

Monday 18 June 2012 19:43

did you actually brush them and do a terrible job or what?

bmkc4 1

Monday 18 June 2012 19:45

You should have done the same thing back to him lol

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Holidays Lonely Relatable Capitalism Work Bosses You're fired Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, my brother and sister-in-law come over ONLY to use up the resources at our house - like food, TV subscriptions, and other items. They claim to love my kids and come over for them. If only they would look up from their phone and spend actual time with the kids. Is there a way to block toxic relatives? FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 108

Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, at a very important company function where lots of the big bosses were, including the CEO of the company, I absentmindedly introduced the executive director whose name is Whitney as “Whitney Houston.” On stage. In front of ALL of them. I’ll never live this down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 408

Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 047

You deserved it 3 276

Today, I had to call the cops on my batshit crazy neighbor, who’s repeatedly threatened to steal my dog. I finally got her ass on camera. She swears that my dog is being abused because it prefers to sleep outside instead of being in the house. Imagine that, an animal that likes being outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 140

Today, I bought lunch for my grandparents, aunts, and uncles. My uncle apparently felt uncomfortable at the restaurant, because he got up and flipped the table over before leaving. The bill tripled because of the broken glass, and my uncle called me up later for a ride. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 328

You deserved it 1 440

Today, I was working at the library. Some punks thought it would be funny to shit in a book, close it and return it in the drop box. The fact that it was sitting outside in the ninety degree heat for a couple hours did not help the stench; it was everywhere and I had to clean the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 221

You deserved it 2 949

Today, I got home from a long, stressful day at class to hear my grandma screaming from inside the barn. I quickly dropped all my things and ran in to see what was going on. Did something fall on her? Was there an animal attacking the horses? No. A pigeon had gotten into the barn. I had to chase it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 233

You deserved it 308