Love: Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried...

By fuckyoutoo - 24/03/2013 23:47 - Canada - Armstrong

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried taking a chip from him. I made popcorn that night, and when he tried to take some, I said, "I'm sorry, I don't share food" to get him back. His response? "I can tell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 319

You deserved it 9 638

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Prince Charming

By muskogee - 20/09/2019 16:00

Today, my boyfriend wouldn’t stop smacking and slurping his food. I told him to at least chew with his mouth closed. He looked me dead in the eye, with a mouth full of chewed up pizza, and said, “No.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 387

You deserved it 354

By Anonymous - 04/03/2010 17:15 - Estonia

Today, I stole a bite of my boyfriend's hamburger. He threw a fit, saying I took too big a bite and I had to replace it with a new, more expensive one. Afterwards, he said how lucky I was he didn't break up with me then and there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 590

You deserved it 10 483

Polite

By mm - 12/11/2012 17:27 - United Kingdom - Warrington

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 874

You deserved it 8 979

By SMS123 - 25/06/2010 19:42 - United States

Today, I was eating lunch with my boyfriend when I started choking. My boyfriend took it as an opportunity to sneak food off my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 482

You deserved it 4 789

Nature calls

By anon - 27/07/2023 22:00

Today, my idiot boyfriend, who thinks he's an outdoorsman, made sauce from mushrooms he'd foraged. I refused to eat it. He got upset and had two helpings. He's now in bed, whining about how bad he feels. Stupid dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 875

You deserved it 181

He's trying to kill you!

By Mary - 21/10/2019 22:00 - United States

Today, while at a party, my boyfriend threw a temper tantrum. He screamed at me and then gave me the silent treatment. All because I said, "No thank you" to the crab dip he got for me. I'm allergic to shellfish, we've been dating for two years and it's come up before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 923

You deserved it 218

Food fight

By hss - 30/05/2011 01:59 - United States

Today, my fiancé and I had a fight because he wouldn't let me get what I wanted to eat, even though it was my money. He said, "It's way too many calories. I'm supposed to help you lose weight." When I pointed out that I had given up a month ago, he looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can tell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 888

You deserved it 49 755

By Anonymous - 23/09/2011 17:46 - United States

Today, I treated my boyfriend to an expensive dinner using the last of my paycheck. I had to excuse myself to the bathroom a few minutes in. I came back to find my plate empty. His excuse was, "I didn't want the food to get cold." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 983

You deserved it 4 377

By bertiebeth - 02/08/2014 05:35 - Australia - Padstow

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 773

You deserved it 4 031

By Anonymous - 12/05/2012 20:04 - Egypt - Cairo

Today, my boyfriend sat me down for a "confession". His confession consisted of him saying that "women are like a bag of chips," and that while you can love the smokey BBQ flavor, every once in a while you just have to go for some salt and vinegar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 832

You deserved it 2 434

curtyman11 9

Monday 25 March 2013 9:23

Joey doesn't share food!

Dracoboxer357 35

Monday 25 March 2013 9:39

Aaaaaand then I reread this fml, and realized I'm an idiot, as he started it, she retorted and he took it up a notch into ******** mode. :p Commence the thumb burial, please.

Comments

onorexveritas 23

Monday 25 March 2013 18:58

burn

OverBlossomed 21

Monday 25 March 2013 19:06

What is with all these FMLs about rude boyfriends and girlfriends? Suddenly, I'm very happy that I've never had a relationship and I think I may keep it that way.

MisssMia 9

Tuesday 26 March 2013 11:37

You ve never had a relationship? How old are you?

OverBlossomed 21

Sunday 21 June 2015 5:06

At the time of this, I was a month from turning 19.

michiganlost 2

Monday 25 March 2013 19:08

Why are you with him?

mokielove 10

Monday 25 March 2013 19:12

just when u thought you had him. burnnnn

otecasacid 22

Monday 25 March 2013 19:25

You have to determine who is the Alpha in the relationship, who is in charge and who gets to make decisions that encompass both of you. Generally the male is alpha, and the female submits to him, especially in matters of food. For instance, bought my girlfriend and I breakfast this morning, chose the place, let her choose her meal, and when she half finished it she gave it to me. Girls GENERALLY eat less than guys, fact of anatomy because in most relationships the guy is significantly larger. Guys love food, and guys don't take food jokes, its serious business.