Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend told me that he doesn't know why I think...

By Anonymous - 13/10/2015 07:35 - United States - Davis

Today, my boyfriend told me that he doesn't know why I think deepthroating is so uncomfortable. To prove his point, he grabbed my dildo and effortlessly slid it down his throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 972

You deserved it 6 175

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Same thing different taste

The prick

By Anonymous - 07/10/2022 17:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend asked me to deep throat him and I had to tell him he isn’t long enough to reach my throat. It just about reaches the back of my tongue, but that’s it. He’s now sulking. I can’t change the length of his prick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 486

You deserved it 617

Double standard

By NoSexForMe - 13/07/2014 07:46 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 821

You deserved it 8 660

By soisblueballsdickhead - 26/10/2014 14:25 - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to give my boyfriend a blowjob. Barely 20 seconds in, he said: "I'll be honest, this is TERRIBLE." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 047

You deserved it 9 713

By sucks at sucking - 15/12/2012 00:27 - United Kingdom - Bournemouth

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 890

You deserved it 9 242

Preparation

By Anonymous - 18/08/2022 12:00

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 447

Hummmmm

By Anonymous - 28/08/2013 16:11 - United States - Spokane

Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 120

You deserved it 10 534

Chemistry

By Anonymous - 21/01/2023 10:00

Today, I got my boyfriend's pants down for the first time and turns out my thumb is bigger than his erect penis. I already know he has weak tongue technique, but this is an extra slap in the face I do not need. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 224

You deserved it 366

Man of mystery

By Anonymous - 22/02/2021 00:30

Today, I found a video of my fiance staring into the camera while deep-throating a dildo, and then putting it other places. I have no idea who/what it was for, or how to talk to him about this, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with his disinterest in me lately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 112

You deserved it 183

Can't be bothered

By Anonymous - 07/05/2024 20:00 - Germany

Today, I told my man that, in order to get me ready for sex within a minute whenever he wants, he only needs to relearn how to go down on me, which he used to do splendidly but has somehow forgotten. He apparently considers this too much effort and will rather keep groping me unsuccessfully. FML

I agree, your life sucks 712

You deserved it 179

By whyeventry? - 02/08/2013 04:39 - United States - Neenah

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 162

You deserved it 12 723

umerin 32

Wednesday 14 October 2015 1:37

That's talent.

Welshite 39

Wednesday 14 October 2015 1:40

He just proved "practice makes perfect."

Comments

hordriss 14

Wednesday 14 October 2015 10:31

He clearly has deepthroating experience!

bonermonkey 31

Wednesday 14 October 2015 11:37

at least he isn't one of those hypocritical assholes that expects you to do it when he wouldn't dream of it?

tylercoffman420 19

Wednesday 14 October 2015 11:45

i think op is jealous

tamesenicole 27

Wednesday 14 October 2015 12:40

He been practicing smh

bad_boyfriend 10

Wednesday 14 October 2015 16:07

Some people just don't have a gag reflex.

Doechi 3

Wednesday 14 October 2015 16:31

ugh, I know that feeling. I can get a few inches down my throat before gagging, but my SO apparently has no gag reflex. I want that talent ?

KingOfTheLosers 7

Wednesday 14 October 2015 17:34

please tell me how this is a fml, when both of them are ok with what happened?

KingOfTheLosers 7

Wednesday 14 October 2015 18:04

The moderators here certainly think every comment to a story is directed to them... And I meant no offense, but was simply wondering. Yes, I know you are going to moderate this one as well, so go ahead.

smidge1987 11

Wednesday 14 October 2015 19:44

This fml actually had me laughing. Impressed with the op's bf managing to pull that off firstly cos it's not an easy thing to do, and op's response is awesome too haha. I think he deserves some sexy fun time for that. As for all the folks saying check his sexuality, they are prob just jealous they can't pull that off :)