Miscellaneous: Today, my cousin is visiting from Oklahoma. He can't go a minute... - FML

By fuck YOLO - 03/04/2013 05:20 - United States - Ramona

Today, my cousin is visiting from Oklahoma. He can't go a minute without saying "YOLO" or "Swag". He's going to be here for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 339

You deserved it 3 927

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/09/2013 21:51 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, my 16-year-old cousin came to visit for the week. So far, she's said "raunchy", "cray-cray", "legit", and "like" an uncountable number of times. She's only been here for a half hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 872

You deserved it 3 753

By Braelynn - 26/01/2011 07:48

Today, my 4 year old cousin is staying overnight. Every time I fall asleep he wakes me up to tell me I fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 204

You deserved it 3 790

By kids are meh - 16/05/2016 21:47 - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, I told my cousin it would be okay if he stayed the weekend after a fight with his wife. He didn't tell me he was bringing his 4 kids. They've watched funny cat videos for hours and they laugh like maniacs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 131

You deserved it 1 356

Little shit

By Anonymous - 28/10/2010 04:44 - Canada

Today, my little cousin is going to be staying at our house for a year or so, because of financial problems. It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that every single night he creeps up on me while I'm sleeping, and shouts, "GO FUCK YOURSELF!" directly into my ear. Only another 11 months to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 589

You deserved it 3 505

By SomeDJ - 12/08/2009 03:34 - United States

Today, my cousin came over. I left my iPod on shuffle in the room we were in as I left to go to the bathroom. When I came back she was jamming out to "My Dick" by Mickey Avalon. She won't stop singing it and her mom is coming over to pick her up in an hour. She's 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 107

You deserved it 46 892

By Anonymous - 24/04/2012 04:44 - United States

Today, I yet again heard a friend say "YOLO" as if it's a word. It was so annoying that I had to restrain myself from punching him in the face and offering him the chance to suck on one of my turds, since apparently "YOLO." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 928

You deserved it 5 813

Slipped my mind

By PaulineB - 12/10/2024 16:00 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, I was complaining to my best friend about my weird cousin and how annoying he is whenever I see him (which isn't often, thankfully). She replied, “Isn’t that my boyfriend you're talking about?” Turns out, yes. Yes, he is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 177

You deserved it 371

By Anonymous - 28/05/2013 16:42 - United States

Today, after being told by her therapist to try to make her kids a bigger part of her life because we're so distant from her, my mom's new favorite thing to do is to constantly use the words "YOLO" and "swag" around us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 789

You deserved it 5 648

By soannoyed - 22/09/2013 21:21 - United States

Today, my brother decided it would be funny for almost every sentence out of his mouth to start with the word "hashtag". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 725

You deserved it 4 410

You what?

By daddyrobyn - 18/12/2018 13:30

Today, my aunt informed me that my cousin's only problem with his girlfriend is that she's not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 424

You deserved it 159

Next

Top comments

chrisp87 11

Wednesday 3 April 2013 12:03

I'm assuming your cousin is a teenager who probably plays Xbox and screams ( Come at me bro )

Bakarra 22

Wednesday 3 April 2013 12:19

Does he use hash tags unnecessarily too? #swag#yolo#420#FML #bouttogetburied

Comments

gimmicksz 9

Wednesday 3 April 2013 21:27

Ugh YOLO is one of the most annoying phrases ever, n when i think Oklahoma i think of farm kids lol not wannabe thugs...

xxEternalRain 13

Wednesday 3 April 2013 21:51

You obviously love oreos

sappel 4

Wednesday 3 April 2013 21:56

And this is why I hate Oklahoma..lol that's all I see around here..and hash tags and the stupid sunglasses with lines through them that aren't even sunglasses there just plastic glasses with lines and space wtf is wrong with people grow up ur not 12..

tommyfox 19

Wednesday 3 April 2013 21:57

He must be from Nompton.

viper8608 9

Wednesday 3 April 2013 22:02

punch him in the face. then be like ******* yolo

margojill 13

Wednesday 3 April 2013 23:24

Making Oklahoma look bad... At least you don't have to live here.

brightonman 4

Wednesday 3 April 2013 23:28

Everyone knows... It's SWERVE

Gunnarr 12

Wednesday 3 April 2013 23:38

Kill it. Kill it with fire..

oubaby29 3

Thursday 4 April 2013 0:10

I'm from Oklahoma. I'm a teenage girl. And I have never said either of those idiotic words. What's my prize?!?

Knightchaser27 25

Thursday 4 April 2013 0:11

I think to never use it is to use it correctly.

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The Top

Today, my roommate drew a giant red penis and scrotum on our refrigerator, using what he thought was a dry erase marker. It was a permanent marker. I just renewed my lease. I get to look at a red penis every day for the next year and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 223

You deserved it 5 150

Today, I’m 15 and my mother banned me from watching YouTube because it’s "distracting." What the f***? How? Now I have to pretend that I've watched the things my friends send me so they won’t know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 149

You deserved it 455

The Top

Today, I got back home from work and casually asked my dad, "What's up?" He casually replied, "Wishing I'd had a son instead." and stared glassy-eyed at me until I left the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 013

You deserved it 3 043

Today, while heartbroken, I reached out to an old friend who I hadn’t spoken to in a while. He responded to my, “Hello” with, “You need to lift the veil from your eyes. Q is leaving breadcrumbs so Donald can take down the zionist deep state that’s feeding us babies in our Big Macs.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 270

You deserved it 231

Today, my friend won’t pay me back the money I lent her. I stupidly lent her $1200. She’s calling me an “inconsiderate bitch” because I “have a good paying job, I’ll be alright.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 117

You deserved it 257

Today, I went outside to smoke a cigarette. I had my headphones in and was blasting my music. It was also cold so I had my hood up. I had my back turned to the house and wasn't paying attention. My brother thought I was a burglar and tackled me to the concrete. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 902

You deserved it 30 728

Today, to impress my date with dinner, I spent hours prepping and cooking. Just as I was about to serve her, I realized I'd left the stove on and my kitchen was on fire. As the fire trucks arrived and my date looked on in horror, I couldn't help but think, "My cooking is so hot it literally set the house on fire." FML

I agree, your life sucks 686

You deserved it 461

Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 800

You deserved it 5 956