Animals: Today, my dad thought it would be funny to wake me up by sprinkling...

By Anonymous - 28/12/2013 00:05 - New Zealand - Christchurch

Today, my dad thought it would be funny to wake me up by sprinkling catnip over me then dropping my cat on top of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 209

You deserved it 3 812

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Same thing different taste

Asshole

By Anonymous - 21/06/2013 20:38 - Netherlands - Mierlo

Today, my drunk dad decided to wake me up by lobbing our cat directly into my now-mauled face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 144

You deserved it 3 234

By Anonymous - 27/04/2012 15:22 - United States - Pleasant Hill

Today, I woke up, got up, and felt something crunchy under my feet. My son thought it would be funny if he spread cat litter all around the house. Used cat litter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 319

You deserved it 2 576

By XxEmoWolfiexX - 24/05/2012 21:18 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, my cat woke me up, but not by kneading on me though. Instead, she woke me up by pouncing on the laser pointer my dad was shining on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 869

You deserved it 2 626

Obey, human

By Anonymous - 28/02/2023 12:00

Today, after struggling to fall asleep due to stress, my cat decided to wake me up by standing on me and meowing until I got up. Just for me to show him that my boyfriend had already put food in his dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 711

You deserved it 167

Welcome to the family!

By Sprtsgeek13 - 13/09/2012 12:37 - United States - Camden

Today, I had my girlfriend over to meet my parents. After dinner, we were in the living room talking. My dad thought it would be funny to grab our cat, stick it down his shirt, then pretend to give birth to it, with sound effects. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 440

You deserved it 2 534

Rise and shine

By Anonymous - 29/04/2020 08:00

Today, my cat woke me up at 3 a.m. by jumping from the shelf and landing on my nutsack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 549

You deserved it 282

Cats can do anything, but they have to want to

By Thankful I wear glasses - 29/06/2021 19:01 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, after encouraging my cat to try his new cat bed all day with no success, I attempted to gently place him in it. Instead, he managed to fear-spray me in the face. Like a skunk. I didn't even know cats could do that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 297

By littlespoon - 04/02/2010 08:40 - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be a funny idea to spray me with a hose while I was holding a kitten, showing her how cute we were. Needless to say, now I'm covered head to toe in cat scratches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 459

You deserved it 3 567

Nutshot

By Unwilling Target - 03/10/2022 09:00 - United States

Today, my dad decided to test if Nerf guns actually hurt by sneaking up on me and shooting me with one. He missed; however, when he shot at me again, he hit my cat on my lap, causing my poor cat to run away. After desperately trying to apologize to my cat, he then shot at me a THIRD time, nailing me in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 160

By Michelle - 20/02/2011 17:45 - United States

Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 108

You deserved it 4 973

pandabrr 12

Saturday 28 December 2013 5:06

Do the same when he's sleeping.

DocBastard 38

Saturday 28 December 2013 5:11

Your dad isn't the only one who thinks it's funny. *adds this to List Of Things To Do To My Children When They Become Teenagers And Piss Me Off*

Comments

evilplatypus 38

Saturday 28 December 2013 5:17

Please don't start a cat v. dog war. This FML is so hilarious; don't ruin it by causing fights in the comments!!!

BanAnnalee 12

Saturday 28 December 2013 5:21

You poor soul, I hope he didn't scar you up too bad.

N3766 20

Saturday 28 December 2013 5:21

stop acting like a good guy you evil platypus

Link/DD 13

Saturday 28 December 2013 5:42

Put some in his mouth when he's sleeping

zaise_chsa 19

Saturday 28 December 2013 5:59

Did the cat nip you?

daisyrose104 9

Saturday 28 December 2013 6:06

dat pussy... cat

cyttex 13

Saturday 28 December 2013 8:36

No cat fml is incomplete without the one person who makes a pussy joke.

dachayke 16

Saturday 28 December 2013 6:33

Empty the litter box on him while he's sleeping

JoeyJaws68 18

Saturday 28 December 2013 7:25

Your dad was correct

Kateyez_26 13

Saturday 28 December 2013 7:44

You should sprinkle some on his balls when he's sleeping

dachayke 16

Saturday 28 December 2013 15:43

You are an evil genius.

VampOfSavannah 31

Saturday 28 December 2013 8:02

Your dad sounds awesome.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

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You deserved it 1 831

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You deserved it 89

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You deserved it 3 785

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I agree, your life sucks 28 069

You deserved it 3 392

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I agree, your life sucks 28 485

You deserved it 5 317

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I agree, your life sucks 43 345

You deserved it 3 113

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You deserved it 188