Animals: Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him...

By honeybunny90 - 28/12/2013 08:23 - United States - Richmond

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 512

You deserved it 5 887

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Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Username - 02/08/2011 17:35 - United States

Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 475

You deserved it 5 305

By Z3R0G5 - 06/01/2014 23:00 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 177

You deserved it 19 258

By Cedar Buero - 05/03/2017 19:00 - United States - Cape Girardeau

Today, my dog thought it would be a good idea to use my phone as a chew toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 403

You deserved it 685

By WellThatSucks - 23/05/2016 09:15 - United States

Today, I discovered my dog pooped in my bed, under the covers, by rolling over onto it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 190

You deserved it 1 396

How shocking!

By Anonymous - 04/03/2018 01:30

Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to put his dog shock collar on me to wake me in lieu of my alarm. You know how those cartoon characters look when they're electrocuted? That's exactly how I woke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 454

You deserved it 386

Love is love

By Taylor505 - 07/10/2024 08:00 - United States - Ocala

Today, my dog carried on with his recent habit of trying to hump me. When I told my mom, she just joked that he's my new boyfriend. Now my whole family is just calling him my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 96

Who's a good boy?

By Hey buddy - 10/11/2022 10:00

Today, my dog celebrated my coming home by slapping me in the junk repeatedly with his tail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 611

You deserved it 184

By ballbreath - 16/07/2014 15:44 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I woke up to my dog jumping on my bed and licking me all over. It would've been fine, if I hadn't woken the first time a few minutes earlier to the sight of him going to town on his balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 840

You deserved it 5 182

It's Caturday, respect our feline leaders

By believekimber - 09/07/2022 16:00

Today, I was feeding my pets and playing with my puppy when I suddenly felt something behind me. My cat is on the arm of the couch steadily spanking my butt with his paw. I can't win! FML

I agree, your life sucks 607

You deserved it 270

By Pisser - 26/06/2014 04:57 - United States - Portland

Today, my sweet 7-month-old puppy ran up to a big fat dog at the park and did what she always does: roll over on her back to start to play. The big fat dog lifted his leg and peed all over my puppy's belly. After the shock, my soaking wet puppy jumped on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 187

You deserved it 5 723

alex_the_tiger 14

Saturday 28 December 2013 15:55

That's awesome

Tayleena97 11

Saturday 28 December 2013 15:57

That's shockingly adorable ^-^

Comments

whatever202 11

Saturday 28 December 2013 18:23

Smart dog...

JadeStonewolf 5

Saturday 28 December 2013 18:28

dude that's adorable!!

I_crosbourne 3

Saturday 28 December 2013 18:30

Your dog sounds awesome

sugarbear0727 19

Saturday 28 December 2013 18:32

lol. thats cute.

alankrita 1

Saturday 28 December 2013 18:34

must be an intelligent dog

dethtrain 5

Saturday 28 December 2013 18:48

thats adorabley awesome.

sxm 13

Saturday 28 December 2013 19:00

That's so sweet.

foreveralone7_fml 17

Saturday 28 December 2013 19:12

That is adorable. You have a really smart dog!

robclnt 1

Saturday 28 December 2013 19:16

at least you have a smart dog :) I'd do it back to him lol

mryoung702 7

Saturday 28 December 2013 19:23

on the other hand.. you have a really smart dog...

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my future sister-in-law, who hasn’t even been engaged a week, informed everyone that the wedding is on December 19th, which is the due date of my first child. My brother won’t change the date and is making my family choose between his wedding or being at the hospital with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 536

You deserved it 211

Today, I took my 8 year-old daughter to an airplane museum to show her the kinds of aircraft I’ve worked on during my 30+ year career. In the first 15 minutes, I had grease on my new shirt, bumped my head, spilled coffee and cut my hand. Sums up my career. Only 10 more years to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 472

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, I was escorted out of a grocery store for beating my boyfriend with a block of cheese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 612

You deserved it 73 612

Today, I figured out how serious my weight problem really is when my boyfriend had to lift a fat roll before he could enter me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 807

You deserved it 59 423

Today, I had to go cap in hand to my father-in-law to ask for a loan so I could pay the mortgage, so now he thinks I’m a useless bum who can’t support my family. The truth is it was his daughter the gambler who wasted all our savings, but I can’t bring myself to upset him by telling him the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 084

You deserved it 286

Today, my wife and I were born on the same day, married on our birthday date. Today is our birthday and anniversary, and today we are getting divorced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 028

You deserved it 1 630

Today, I was ready to get intimate with my husband 7 months after giving birth to our son. He always made excuses as to why he couldn’t. Our marriage was on the rocks because of this, so when I sat him down to talk he admitted that to save this marriage I need to get a “tummy tuck” and a “breast lift.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 092

You deserved it 244

Today, I got a ticket for driving without insurance. I gave the cop my insurance information, but he said it was invalid because it didn't show an expiration date. When I pointed out the information he was looking for, he ignored me and gave me a ticket anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 021

You deserved it 1 675