Miscellaneous: Today, my family threw me a surprise party. I was so surprised...

By Em - 30/04/2009 16:45 - United States

Today, my family threw me a surprise party. I was so surprised I punched my mom in the face when she screamed SURPRISE! FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 60

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

kfrizzle2 4

Sunday 20 June 2010 4:36

Mom: SURPRISE!!! OP: *Punches* Mom: Whats wrong with you, it's me! OP: *Punches harder*

jrock94 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 23:39

Today, I decided to throw my son a surprise party. When I yelled surprise, he punched me in the face. FML

Comments

casscontagious 0

Friday 1 May 2009 4:34

ahaha. #48 has a good point :P when im surprised i just shriek for too long.

Sakeyaki 0

Friday 1 May 2009 4:34

...Wow. On a side note--this just made me think of Andy Samberg.

kfrizzle2 4

Monday 21 June 2010 7:11

Lol from the SNL video? Me too!! That was sooo funny. Bon Jovi punch! Full Recovery! Ahaha

bdogg 0

Friday 1 May 2009 4:57

Whatever, she probably deserved it

shaPOW 0

Friday 1 May 2009 5:13

why does everyone on this website punch people when they're startled?

superunknown 0

Friday 1 May 2009 5:24

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..i'm sorry

Loe_307 0

Friday 1 May 2009 5:38

Hey sometimes you gotta punch mom in the face like daddy does.

uptown_girl 0

Friday 1 May 2009 5:46

Haha... Well, was she okay at least?

leftie 0

Friday 1 May 2009 12:05

this is awesome

KnOcOuT 0

Friday 1 May 2009 12:23

What you should have done was drop to the ground and get in the cradle positon. That would have gone over real well. =)

SweetHostage74 0

Friday 1 May 2009 15:07

LMAO That's hilarious!

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 658

You deserved it 3 777

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 052

You deserved it 409

The Top

Today, a fight broke out in a bar between several people, over some talk about one of their moms being somewhat inclined towards intercourse with her pets. I managed to slip out quietly with just a scratch from flying chair debris, despite having started the rumor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 236

You deserved it 69 701

Today, my husband of 3 years, who I have a 1 year old daughter with, told me he wants a divorce, but who knows, maybe in the future we can "date." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 964

You deserved it 3 452

Today, my date made me pay him for picking me up, and taking me back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 368

You deserved it 3 747

Today, I said thanks to a man who got up for me in the bus. He angrily said "no, not you!". The old lady who sat down is now staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 199

You deserved it 7 985

Today, it's been a month since I silently moved on from my online boyfriend. I met him in a chatroom after a break-up. I thought he was my "forever after." He told me he'd lost his feelings for me and told me to wait. I waited, only for him to reveal that he was going on a date by asking me if a shirt was good for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 296

You deserved it 188

Today, my girlfriend's parents asked if I could move their car. I started the engine and began to accelerate, not noticing that the automatic transmission was on R. I drove right into a wall behind me, shattering the rear lights. Now I owe them $150 for repairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 304

You deserved it 3 226