Miscellaneous: Today, my friend and I went to a club. She said I look hilarious... - FML

By Bad Dancer - 05/07/2015 01:48 - United States - Rock Hill

Today, my friend and I went to a club. She said I look hilarious when I dance drunk. I was completely sober. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 035

You deserved it 3 532

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Pour some more funny!

By Bruce - 12/03/2023 00:00

Today, my alcoholic friend, who is now sober, told me I was a lot more fun when he was drinking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 775

You deserved it 158

Chuds out on the town

By GeeThanks - 25/07/2013 02:33 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a drunk dude walked up to me and said, "You're ugly as fuck." His sober friend quickly apologized and explained that he was wasted, before looking me up and down and adding, "Well, not completely, I guess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 578

You deserved it 3 995

By Anonymous - 19/08/2009 22:31 - Canada

Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 122

You deserved it 4 709

Dancing With The Stares

By Travolta - 20/05/2019 02:13

Today, I was at a party and I danced. Judging by people's stares, I should never ever attempt it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 309

By lifesucks - 24/02/2009 19:21 - United States

Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 963

You deserved it 50 277

Party hard

By Jason the flasher - 15/09/2018 22:00

Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 3 262

By allennn - 14/03/2010 14:56 - France

Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 927

You deserved it 38 549

This is the rhythm of the night

By rikitsumiatsu - 10/04/2020 02:00

Today, my wife showed me a video she took of me last night. I was shit-faced, dancing half naked to '90s club music in the middle of the street at midnight. She won't stop laughing at me and replaying the video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 705

You deserved it 2 268

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 540

You deserved it 3 197

By the-yao - 24/01/2009 14:53 - United States

Today, someone told me they liked my personality when I'm drunk. I asked, "What about when I'm sober?". "No, only when you're drinking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 902

You deserved it 3 811

Next

Top comments

anonymuse_fml 31

Sunday 5 July 2015 19:36

Don't worry about it. The best thing about clubbing is that everyone always thinks you're drunk so it doesn't matter if you dance horribly.

ScratchCatPower 32

Sunday 5 July 2015 19:35

Don't dance too crazily, I guess? FYL.

Comments

ChristinePi 36

Sunday 5 July 2015 20:42

We can dance if we want to. We can leave your friends behind. 'Cause if your friends don't dance and if they don't dance, well they're no friends of mine.

SteveBassist 20

Sunday 5 July 2015 23:42

Safety dance!

IridianShadow 20

Sunday 5 July 2015 21:01

If they laugh too much, you should just become a comedian and start charging them.

Justincredible69 11

Sunday 5 July 2015 21:10

I always dance drunk. it's more fun.

amanda182 19

Sunday 5 July 2015 21:19

If you were having fun then who cares.

boultzboi 20

Sunday 5 July 2015 21:29

that can be our little secret lol

voodoochild01 7

Sunday 5 July 2015 21:31

You're friend was to drunk I guess fhl

worldclassrager 39

Sunday 5 July 2015 22:01

You better dance like no one is watching you... ~Inhale Exhale

newyorkerkyle 24

Sunday 5 July 2015 22:13

Lol I dance badly too

SirMrButters 28

Sunday 5 July 2015 22:52

Then get drunk maybe you'll dance like your sober

G00N3R 19

Sunday 5 July 2015 23:15

Take the hint

1
2
3
4
5

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident ADHD Medication Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, my jobless husband wants to buy the latest iPhone. His current phone is in good condition, except that he has a 1000 apps on it slowing it down. We're also in deeply crushing debt from all his bad financial decisions from his severely loss-making business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 170

You deserved it 182

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 006

You deserved it 3 398

The Top

Today, I was sleeping after having worked 76 hours over the last week on night shift, only to be woken up by a fire alarm in the hotel I'm staying in. I rushed to put on some clothes and head out, but couldn't hide my morning wood, which would not go away. People took pictures as we were waiting to be let back inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 217

You deserved it 138

Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's last will and testament. My parents, as well as my brothers and sister, all inherited a nice sum of money. I got 69 cents, because, "young Jack always was an immature little shit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 490

You deserved it 21 607

Today, I learned that not texting my girlfriend for two days is considered dumping her, and is ample reason to screw other men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 423

You deserved it 10 056

Today, in front of my 6 brothers, my mother told me I had the smallest penis at birth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 257

You deserved it 321

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he came. This was a good thing, except that when he did, he started bellowing the Imperial March theme from Star Wars. When I asked him about it, all he said was, "I thought you'd like it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 597

You deserved it 4 203

Today, after a full year of work getting my house decorated, it was finally finished. I stepped back from the last painted wall to admire it and my neighbour on the other side of the wall, who was doing some decorating of his own, drilled too far and punched his drill bit right through the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 131