Miscellaneous: Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed...

By Anonymous - 11/06/2013 03:23 - United States - Cleveland

Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 782

You deserved it 17 569

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By iliketoastalot - 09/08/2011 17:38 - United States

Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 645

You deserved it 5 909

By Bec - 25/07/2011 14:10 - Australia

Today, the police were canvassing my neighbourhood about a recent robbery. When I answered the door, my brother saw badges, panicked, and jumped out our apartment's third-storey window in an attempt to escape. He thought they were after him for using a bong two weeks ago. I'm related to this twit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 433

You deserved it 3 605

By doneanddone - 28/02/2009 17:33 - United States

Today, I was over at a friend's place until very late. He had stolen my keys as a joke at some point, but by the time I noticed, he was too drunk to remember where he'd hidden them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 779

You deserved it 8 746

By Anonymous - 24/07/2016 03:18 - United States

Today, I found out the friend I signed a lease with is actually a wanted drug dealer. I only found this out after the police kicked in the door at 5am and raided our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 246

You deserved it 1 434

Born to run

By Ipickthegoodones - 26/06/2009 06:43 - United States

Today, I had three sheriffs come to my door, turns out my boyfriend of three years went on a robbing spree last week and brought the stolen merchandise back to my apartment. The best part: He used my car while committing the robberies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 226

You deserved it 6 636

Classic sting

By Anonymous - 25/01/2021 23:01 - Canada

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to prank my friend. When he came to pick me up in his car, I pulled up my mask, put on my toque, got in the back seat and yelled "This is a robbery! Don't talk! Drive now!" I'd hopped in the back of the wrong car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 1 691

By SenescentSouthernBoy - 17/08/2009 08:42 - United States

Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 482

You deserved it 60 802

By wreckdit - 12/10/2016 23:55 - United States

Today, I discovered that my roommate is a drug dealer and has been keeping her product in our flat. I discovered this when several police officers broke down my bathroom door and arrested me while I was in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 803

You deserved it 726

By Anonymous - 02/03/2011 11:20 - United States

Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 577

You deserved it 6 347

Sneaky

By TasedAndDazed - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 619

You deserved it 43 664

Fluffydemise 18

Tuesday 11 June 2013 11:28

You are not an accomplice, and the police will surely figure that out. What you most definitely are, however, is a bad judge of character!

EngageZoo5 8

Tuesday 11 June 2013 11:22

The jig is up. The news is out. They finally found you.

Comments

accousticjett 3

Tuesday 11 June 2013 20:35

I am now in jail and I thought "man, you know what I should do? Fml it."

amy6703 6

Tuesday 11 June 2013 20:38

I call bs, if that was true, op would still be in jail waiting on a judge to set bond.

jonha21 11

Tuesday 11 June 2013 20:38

WUHAHAHAAH #FYL

rickyblair 16

Tuesday 11 June 2013 21:49

His tone must've been awfully light for you not to think twice about it lol I admire his nonchalance.

queerdragon 20

Tuesday 11 June 2013 22:08

Yeah, if someone says they rob a band you don't usually let them into your apartment.

voidsoul22 3

Tuesday 11 June 2013 23:17

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I present the final piece of evidence in my client's defense. Please observed this posting on fmylife.com, in which he freely declares ignorance of his friend's activities. Why would he post on the site unless his L was truly F'ed? He is clearly innocent of the charges. I rest my case."

TogeBara 12

Wednesday 12 June 2013 1:27

The suckish part is, that unless your friend stands up for you and says that you were NOT part of this and that you did just think he was joking, you will most likely be charged, as you have no proof that you were not part of it. Get a good lawyer and hope the judge is very understanding my friend. You'll need it.