Health: Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house...

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 071

You deserved it 5 417

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Same thing different taste

It was an accident!

By innocent - 06/01/2014 21:32 - Australia

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 015

You deserved it 7 503

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 22:50 - France

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a black eye by running into a door. To avoid being teased about her clumsiness, she's telling everyone that I hit her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 104

You deserved it 3 664

By DHarman - 25/05/2010 23:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend actually walked into a door and gave herself a black eye. She's too embarrassed to admit it, so she's telling everyone I beat her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 640

You deserved it 4 070

The best part of breaking up…

By Anonymous - 19/10/2009 23:51 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 045

You deserved it 8 843

By hero to zero - 04/07/2011 16:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 133

You deserved it 15 186

By Anonymous - 15/04/2011 00:53 - Canada

Today, during a major argument with my girlfriend, I shoved a door open, which then rebounded and hit me in the face. I'm not sure which is more pathetic: that I was savaged by a door, or that I made up a story about kicking a mugger's ass to explain the huge black eye to my coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 620

You deserved it 36 077

By filipinoclari808 - 16/04/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 794

You deserved it 81 433

By xxx - 03/09/2017 04:29

Today, at a meeting, I had a heated argument with the only female employee at the office. A little later, I managed to hit her in the face with a door, giving her a bruise. Nobody believes it was an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 671

You deserved it 531

By Anonymous - 17/07/2011 08:43 - United States

Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 374

You deserved it 22 631

By Anonymous - 01/01/2013 10:30 - United States - Wichita

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 918

You deserved it 15 162

every1luvsboners 11

Wednesday 25 July 2012 0:53

That means now you can play the sympathy card to get a couple BJ's. Stretch that shit out for as long as you can.

Falassalond 16

Wednesday 25 July 2012 0:54

Sounds like you guys need a vacation. Have a nice trip!

Comments

kofeinisti 6

Wednesday 25 July 2012 7:05

If I were OP's girlfriend I'd be mortified if everyone thought I'd hit him. Violence is never cool or funny.

Hockeyboy4280 18

Wednesday 25 July 2012 7:07

At least it looks like she beat you, rather than the alternative...

lexiieeex3 32

Wednesday 25 July 2012 7:08

What a bitch.

imahistorylover 4

Wednesday 25 July 2012 7:14

don't argue with women it never ends well

tooney_fml 8

Wednesday 25 July 2012 7:16

Sad part is if it were her who tripped and fell you would have been called a woman beater

imahistorylover 4

Wednesday 25 July 2012 7:20

wow

aj510 5

Wednesday 25 July 2012 7:50

Well mabye if you werent such an ass-less dick-**** that wouldnt have happend

blink182AAR 6

Wednesday 25 July 2012 8:22

Why is it that when a girl beats a guy, it's funny and they get made fun of for it. But when a guy beats a girl, it's a horrible thing and they get in loads of shit for it?

DedaGrotesque187 0

Wednesday 25 July 2012 9:21

Because most people think that women are weak and men are strong. WRONG! Same crime should come with the same charges. Because I've seen some women out here in the country that could beat down a few men at once. lol

blink182AAR 6

Thursday 26 July 2012 14:19

you're exactly right.

tobedd 13

Wednesday 25 July 2012 8:35

Sorry, if you're having public fights then it's time to move on, you will not be good for each other in the long run.

sweetheart4410 1

Wednesday 25 July 2012 9:37

I have to agree :) it can become a toxic relationship for both

sweetheart4410 1

Wednesday 25 July 2012 9:40

I don't think abuse is a funny joke . Men should be real men and walk away with out laying a hand on her , as well a lady should never hit a man or provoke it either . The laws should be equal abuse is abuse .