Love: Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over the phone, after having...

By Anonymous - 28/07/2015 15:18 - United States - Milford

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over the phone, after having left me to look after her dog while she went on a 2-week vacation with her family. Now I have to choose between paying for a kennel for her damn dog or taking care of it every day until she gets back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 167

You deserved it 2 448

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Same thing different taste

By Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 773

You deserved it 2 890

Used

By Anonymous - 06/07/2009 20:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend came over to talk. She just got back from a small vacation, and she'd asked me to feed her dogs while she was gone, so I did. I even stayed with them at times so they wouldn't get lonely. My girlfriend had come over to break up with me. She didn't do so earlier because she needed her dogs fed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 012

You deserved it 3 233

By CRWMEN - 22/12/2009 05:57 - United States

Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 403

You deserved it 3 286

By Anonymous - 04/01/2011 14:49 - United States

Today, my girlfriend whom I'm crazy about broke up with me out of the blue. After pleading with her unsuccessfully, I called my mom for comfort and advice. She informed me that my dog had died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 701

You deserved it 3 179

By Anonymous - 30/05/2012 05:25 - United States - Astoria

Today, my fiancé and I broke up, and he won't answer my calls or texts. I don't want him back; he has my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 198

You deserved it 3 494

By really? - 23/09/2013 02:24 - United States

Today, I texted my girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out because my dog died this morning and we were burying him. She replied that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog. She then broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 078

You deserved it 4 407

Adopt, don't shop

By Dognapped - 20/03/2022 04:00

Today, I went to pick up my dog from a friend's place since she agreed to watch him while I went out of state for Spring Break. I arrived at her apartment. She’s gone and the apartment was vacated. She won’t answer her phone or texts, and vanished from all social media. I’m still making payments on the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 598

You deserved it 308

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 17:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because her mom said she would buy her a pug if she did. I got dumped for a dog, and an ugly one for that matter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 668

You deserved it 6 984

By nottrustworthy - 18/11/2010 06:44 - United States

Today, my wife of seven years told me that she doesn't trust me with dog-sitting her dog while she leaves to spend Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's with her family. She ended up calling someone she "trusts" to take care of her dog while I spend the holidays by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 474

You deserved it 4 584

By syn1734 - 16/10/2009 17:33 - United States

Today, my girlfriend called me and told me "she has a surprise for me when I got home" in a sexy voice. So, I hurried home only to find a note saying she left me and took my dog. Deeply depressed, I went into the living room. She took my TV also. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 147

You deserved it 3 443

cutycat136 28

Wednesday 29 July 2015 1:45

Just take it to one of her closest relatives and tell them they'll have to take care of it until she's back because you're leaving.

sandraw1 22

Wednesday 29 July 2015 2:14

Not stealing - taking care of it for an indefinite periode of time :)

Comments

rec_chem 22

Friday 31 July 2015 1:19

Leave it there and let it shit all over the house.

yellowzinnias 20

Friday 31 July 2015 1:21

The fact that those are the two choices you're debating between speaks volumes for you as a person, OP. You are a great human being. Screw her.

ashtonjk 6

Friday 31 July 2015 5:38

Keep the damn dog man

JimmyVZ 4

Friday 31 July 2015 8:05

Make her pay ransom for the dog

Ben12345_fml 18

Friday 31 July 2015 9:20

Take care of it. It's not fair to the dog if you treat it like shit just because of something she did

raysmith121 10

Friday 31 July 2015 9:37

Eat the dog

mayhemily 7

Friday 31 July 2015 14:49

Looks like you own a new dog

sybe112 14

Friday 31 July 2015 19:09

bring it to one of her friends. or just put it in a box and drop it on their doorstep, ring and run.

Freewingradical 4

Saturday 1 August 2015 9:21

Look after the dog till she comes back. When she picks up her dog, say "" i'll miss you ( dogs name)" then close the door.

petergozinya37 8

Saturday 1 August 2015 11:44

Kennel. Makes a nice statement to her. She'll have to pay for the dog before she gets the dog back.

Keywords

Cute Family Love My ex Awkward Embarrassing Weird Work Miscellaneous Ironic Cancer Relatable Party Proposal Bosses Empathy Dogs Animals Furniture Zoom Cats Phone calls Amazon Delivery Babysitter Kids Birds Mysterious Scary Stuck

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a quickie in the car. We had left a window open so it wasn't too hot, and I was holding onto the edge of the window, fingers hanging over. In the midst of it all, my boyfriend managed to close the window by hitting the button. My finger is broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 169

You deserved it 12 517

Today, and for the past 2 years, my aunt has owed me money. She just admitted that she fell for a scam, and gave the scammer more than double the amount I'd loaned her. I felt bad for her… until I realized something. When I asked how she had it to give to them, but not to pay me back, she got mad and hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 74

The Top

Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 979

You deserved it 3 262

Today, in an attempt to face my phobia of public speaking, I accepted an offer to read to a group of elementary school students. It went well, until I reached a rather funny part in the book and completely lost my composure with uncontrollable laughter. I don't think I'll be asked to come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 152

Today, to save money, I tried following a YouTube tutorial to trim my beard myself. Halfway through, the clippers slipped, and now I have a huge chunk missing in the middle of my chin. I tried to even it out, but it just got worse. Now I look like I lost a fight with a Flymo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 336

Today, I had a horrible stomach flu and was well into my second hour of dry heaving when I heard my husband knock on the bathroom door. I was touched that he was worried about me, until I heard, "Honey, what did you make for dinner?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 724

You deserved it 4 100

Today, while looking through my wedding photos, I realised my wife had done a duck face in every single one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 032

You deserved it 6 540

Today, I had a job interview. I was feeling upbeat and confident I was gonna get the position, until I saw that my main qualification on my resume was being a "real n**ga" and "getting bitches and hoes 24/7." My brother had changed it as a prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 267

You deserved it 241

Same thing different taste

Used

Adopt, don't shop

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