Love, Awkward, Religion and Grandparents: Today, my grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She...

By kdgirl - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She told me I'd better start praying for a husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 864

You deserved it 3 226

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

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Same thing different taste

Thanks, I feel better!

By anon - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 976

You deserved it 3 033

You must conform

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Germany - Titisee-neustadt

Today, I'm the only grandchild who regularly visits, calls, and runs errands for my grandparents, even though I live two hours away. I'm also their biggest disappointment because I'm not married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 543

You deserved it 1 708

Miracles

By smyp - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Lithuania

Today, my wife and I decided to celebrate Christmas Eve with her side of the family. When we arrived at her parents' house, I heard her mother say that Christmas miracles don't exist since my wife brought me along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 761

You deserved it 1 688

By in this day and age.... - 19/10/2023 16:25 - United States - Dallas

Today, the first words I heard from my "good, Christian" future mother-in-law included a salvo of curse words and a hushed rant about "them dirty Jews". I'm culturally Jewish. This bodes well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 194

You deserved it 1 826

You snooze, you lose

By propose_you_freakin_coward - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 922

You deserved it 6 856

Self defence

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 117

You deserved it 2 484

By oh why... - 20/12/2013 14:51 - United States

Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 454

You deserved it 4 490

Treat yourself

By birthday bash - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I'm that loser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 211

You deserved it 5 241

Hungover

By RedheadA - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 652

You deserved it 3 697

By kb - 18/11/2013 06:38 - United States

Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 680

You deserved it 4 045

bluecat_fml 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:12

grandma humor, never gets old :P

aardvarkish 16

Tuesday 21 September 2010 12:25

I think I would have said, "Don't worry. My boyfriend promised to leave his wife, stop selling drugs, and then marry me."

Comments

kruzito 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:02

idiot

nycy 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:08

third omg so close

bluecat_fml 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:12

grandma humor, never gets old :P

kayladance101 13

Tuesday 21 September 2010 12:29

ok i know im gonna get screamed at...butwhat are rosary beads? :/ (please dont yell)

pandemic_fml 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 13:01

Google it.

Mylees 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:13

gotta love grandmas and their craziness

SuicidalxDream 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:14

 win

raemermaid 2

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:16

grannies are so much fun lol

sammiller4 3

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:32

lmao old people crack me up

BeeHappy_fml 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:17

HAHAHA xD

goldendoodle95 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:24

grandmothers crack me up they're hilarious

Frenchtony 17

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:24

How mean :O

H8rSk8r 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:24

Or give her a Red Bull and tell her to start flying! Oh. Wait..

Keywords

Gross Poopoo peepee Cats Animals Awkward Smells Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Painful Health First Dates Work Christmas Grieving Social Media Music Anniversary Boredom Abuse Intimacy Ironic Alcohol Am I overreacting? Transportation Drunk AITA Kids Parents Gun control

The Top

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 974

You deserved it 3 568

Today, thanks to too many true crime podcasts and shows, my wife has lost her marbles. She now insists we use code names for our kids while out in public, so that no predators will hear their real names and follow us home to kidnap them. She’s completely serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 926

You deserved it 140

The Top

Today, someone tried to scam me by selling me a ticket to a Chris Cornell concert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 750

You deserved it 109

Today, at the job I've had for eight years, I finally got the raise I was supposed to get a year ago. One hour later I found out the store was closing and we were all out of a job in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 476

You deserved it 2 264

Today, my boyfriend of 8 months was having a really bad day at work. Thinking I would cheer him up a bit, I send him a picture of myself while I was changing. His response? He dumped me. He said it was unprofessional and immature of me to do that. He works in the middle of nowhere, by himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 619

You deserved it 167

Today, my boyfriend backed out on our date so he could help his best friend get ready for some kind of drag queen competition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 307

You deserved it 6 914

Today, after being a resident DJ at a local club for over 4 years, I got fired. Not because I'm bad at what I do, but because my boss thinks I'm not 'having fun like the other DJs'. And by 'having fun' he means that I don't drink enough. I got fired for not being an alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 692

You deserved it 2 145

Today, I had my daughter babysit her two-year-old brother while I went out with my husband. I told her not to let him out of her sight. She certainly did as I said; when I tuned into our internet-enabled baby monitor, I heard her and some guy having sex in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 884

You deserved it 2 984

Same thing different taste

Thanks, I feel better!

You must conform

Miracles

You snooze, you lose

Self defence

Treat yourself

Hungover

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